TIME Soccer

Cristiano Ronaldo Statue Stands at Attention in Portugal

Cristiano Ronaldo Statue
Portuguese soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo from Real Madrid poses during the unveiling ceremony of a statue of himself in his hometown of Funchal, Madeira Island on Dec. 21 2014. Jose Sena Goulao—EPA

It made a big impression

After Cristiano Ronaldo won the Club World Cup with his team Real Madrid, the Portuguese soccer star traveled back to his hometown, Madeira, to unveil Sunday a new bronze statue of himself — but the statue’s overside fold on his shorts, combined with the lighting, created a suggestive illusion.

TIME Food & Drink

Hotel Apologizes for ‘Apartheid’ Cocktail

Icelandair says an employee did not understand what the word meant

Words: sometimes they’re just so hard. A Reykjavik hotel owned by Icelandair has apologized for offering a cocktail called “Apartheid” on its bar menu, saying an employee was “unaware of its meaning.”

To make matters worse, when someone shared an image of the Hotel Reykjavik Marina’s menu on Twitter, Icelandair at first responded, “Simply scrumptious, enjoy! Happy Holidays.”

The company later apologized and explained the mix-up: “[The staffer] thought the word just meant separation and did not understand the connotation and historical significance.”

For the record, “separation” apparently tastes like vodka, stout liqueur, cream and roasted hazelnuts.

TIME animals

This Ad Featuring Pets Eating With Human Hands Is Terrifying

Isn’t it every pet’s dream to be able to eat at the dining room table alongside humans? This ad for pet food company Freshpet replaces the heads of 14 humans sitting around the dining room table with the heads of 13 dogs and one cat. The animals use their human hands to do what many humans do at dinner, play with their iPhones at the table or sneak a sip of booze from a flask underneath the table. The one thing they do not do is talk. Frankly, people watching this spot who have to have dinner with chatty relatives over the holidays might envy that part.

TIME movies

Here’s Where to Watch Your Favorite Christmas Movies

From Bad Santa to White Christmas

One of the easiest ways to get in the Christmas spirit is to turn on a classic holiday movie. To encourage premium winter sloth, we made the process one step easier by compiling a list of where you can stream your favorite holiday films. Get on the nostalgia train with one of these Christmas classics.

  • Bad Santa

    This movie will make parents think twice before letting their kids sit on Santa’s lap. Billy Bob Thornton’s interpretation of a boozing, bawdy, con-artist mall Santa — he’s only in it so he can case stores for a planned heist with his elf sidekick — is pitch perfect in this dark comedy.

    Watch on Netflix or Amazon

  • Ernest Saves Christmas

    Jim Varney plays a bumbling Florida cab driver who transports a retirement-ready Santa around town as he hunts for his successor.

    Watch on Netflix

  • Love Actually

    This 2003 classic comprises at least 10 different romantic comedies tied up in a nice Christmas bow. Hugh Grant, Colin Firth, Keira Knightley, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson and a handful of other big name British actors will make you laugh, cry and burst out singing Mariah Carey songs.

    Watch on Netflix

  • Scrooged

    While putting on a live broadcast of A Christmas Carol, curmudgeonly TV execeutive Bill Murray finds himself living through Ebenezer Scrooge’s journey through Christmas past, present and future.

    Watch on Netflix

  • Miracle on 34th Street

    This 1947 classic is the quintessential Christmas movie. When a Macy’s department store Santa is institutionalized after claiming he is the real Kris Kringle, a lawyer has to prove that he’s the real deal. The film also features a young, skeptical Natalie Wood.

    Watch on Amazon

  • The Muppet Christmas Carol

    Michael Caine teams up with Kermit, Miss Piggy and the rest of the Muppets gang to take on Charles Dickens’ classic in this 1993 flick.

    Watch on Netflix

  • The Nightmare Before Christmas

    In case you’re still nostalgic for Halloween, this animated Tim Burton masterpiece is two holiday movies in one. When Halloween Town’s Jack Skeleton accidentally finds a portal to a significantly merrier Christmas Town, he tries to bring the holiday over to his resistant neighbors.

    Watch on Netflix

  • While You Were Sleeping

    This rom-com isn’t as flashy as Love Actually, but it’ll definitely make you feel all warm and fuzzy. Sandra Bullock plays a Chicago Transit Authority worker who saves a regular commuter she has a crush on from an oncoming train after he’s pushed on the tracks by thieves. After she’s mistaken for the now-comatose Peter Gallagher’s fiancé, Bullock plays the part when she is taken in by his boisterous family. Chaos ensues.

    Watch on Netflix

  • White Christmas

    It doesn’t get more Christmassy than Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye singing Irving Berlin songs. This holiday 1954 holiday classic features Crosby and Kaye as two war buddies who, along with Rosemary Clooney and Vera-Ellen, entertain a group of soldiers by putting on a musical showcase.

    Watch on Netflix

TIME Music

Some Genius Mixed the Serial Theme With Notorious B.I.G.

Fill the Serial void with this mashup

There are certain indisputable facts that are too unpleasant to think about — the whole sitting-will-kill-you thing, the rise of antibiotic resistant superbugs, the knowledge that Benedict Cumberbatch is getting married and the fact that there are no more episodes of Serial‘s first season.

The highly addictive podcast’s season finale was released yesterday and while there are other books, television shows and podcasts to enjoy while waiting for the show’s TBD second season, the end of the podcast has left a void.

Luckily some genius felt our pain and decided to help fill that gaping void by mashing up the Serial theme music with the Notorious B.I.G.’s “Somebody’s Gotta Die,” a song choice that brings to mind this Clickhole article that claims a superfan has agreed to be murdered to ensure a second season of the podcast.

It’s the Notorious B.I.G., so be aware that the lyrics are NSFW and decidedly not PC:

[H/T Digg]

TIME

Here Are 10 Great Gifts Under $10

Need something cheap to stuff the stockings? We've got you covered

Maybe you just need a few more little somethings to keep the kids happy on Christmas morning. Maybe you need a trinket for an office Yankee swap. No matter the need, there are plenty of inexpensive options to fit the bill.

TIME viral

This Insane Jenga Move Is the Most Incredible Thing Any Of Us Will Ever See

No one will ever top this. Shut it down.

Watch carefully, because it all happens so fast. This eight-second video features a woman pulling off a very impressive Jenga move — and though it probably isn’t legal, rules-wise, it’s still really awesome.

Of course, there are some Jenga Truthers out there who think this could be a manufactured stunt. (Understandable, since this is the Internet, and a lot of things here are fake.) As BuzzFeed points out, some Redditors think the Jenga blocks could have been glued together to make the maneuver easier.

But when you hear the glee and wonder and pure amazement of the people watching this Jenga wizard, it’s hard not to believe in it. We all need something to believe in.

Read next: Minecraft Is Getting a Story Mode

TIME viral

Here’s What American Girl Dolls Would Talk About In Real Life

You wouldn't invite them to dinner

If you were a child of the nineties, chances are you’ve thrown a make believe dinner party with your American Girl Dolls.

But this comedic video by Lauren Ireland and Anni Weisband shows why you probably wouldn’t extend a dinner invite if your American Girl Dolls were real girls. Samantha wouldn’t stop talking about voting rights, Kirsten would try to wear the table’s floral centerpiece as a hat and Addy… “I used to be a slave,” she says in a hushed voice. “They didn’t really write much else for my character, I’m pretty one-dimensional.”

TIME Music

Jennifer Lawrence’s Hunger Games Song Gets the Dance Remix No One Asked For

"The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1" Party - The 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival
Jennifer Lawrence attends the "The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1" party at the 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival on May 17, 2014 in Cannes, France. Mike Marsland—WireImage

The surprise hit song takes on a new life

Jennifer Lawrence may hate “The Hanging Tree” — her song from The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part One, reportedly even breaking into tears the day she had to sing on camera — but the world can’t seem to get enough of it.

Not only did the single from Mockingjay land at No. 29 on the charts in the U.K., but now the song has gotten the remix treatment. The original track was a haunting, acoustic song with lyrics penned by The Lumineers and The Hunger Games author Suzanne Collins, but the remix is a club-ready jam that might even get some radio play.

Lawrence may think she sings like “a tone-deaf Amy Winehouse”, and claimed that singing in public is one of her biggest fears, but the remixed single isn’t all that bad. Not that she should give up her day job or anything.

[H/T Vulture]
TIME States

Florida Woman Slaps 72-Year-Old Who Denied Her Facebook Request

The alleged assailant has been charged with aggravated battery

Police arrested a Florida woman accused of slapping a 72-year-old woman who declined her friend request on Facebook.

Rachel Anne Hayes, 27, became upset when the 72-year-old said that her Facebook name was inappropriate and would only accept her friend request if she changed her name, according to the Tampa Bay Times. (What name she uses on the social media site has not been released by authorities.)

The two women began to argue over the matter, and Hayes eventually left the elderly woman’s home. But Hayes then returned, and when the two fought again outside her door, Hayes allegedly slapped the woman who turned down her friend request several times.

Police charged Hayes with aggravated battery on an elderly person, a felony.

[Tampa Bay Times]

Read next: Why a Facebook ‘Sympathize’ Button Is a Terrible Idea

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