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If Bernie Sanders’ Staff Took Over Trump’s Twitter Feed…

3 minute read

Sarah Miller writes for The New Yorker, The Hairpin and other publications

After Bernie Sanders endorsed Hillary Clinton for president, his campaign’s social media managers found themselves looking for meaningful work. As it happened, one man was still running for president. After weeks of being implored to bolster his tiny staff and consider changing his tone, that man relented, and the Bernie staffers began tweeting a new revolution.

@realDonaldTrump: I would never use the Star of David to signal white supremacists but if I did it would be to alert them to the plight of the Jewish people.

@realDonaldTrump: Incrementalism does not serve the working people in this country. We must all start calling Elizabeth Warren Pocahontas today.

@realDonaldTrump: Fracking is threatening our water supply—which is why when I am president all water supplies will have guns.

@realDonaldTrump: To blame an entire nation for one’s person’s crime is nothing less than bigotry and I will take nothing less.

@realDonaldTrump: All working people conducting polls favorable to me deserve healthcare. Ha! But if anyone did=them.

@realDonaldTrump: Join me in my revolution in which I know the facts and truth and everyone who disagrees is a loser who is also fired.

@realDonaldTrump: America has way too many homeless kids who could be working in casinos or yelling at Puerto Ricans who need to get jobs, pronto.

@realDonaldTrump: This isn’t about me. This is about us. But only after it’s about me first.

@realDonaldTrump: It is wrong when we do not treat undocumented workers with the same dignity and respect afforded all Americans but who cares.

@realDonaldTrump: We cannot succumb to bigotry in the face of these attacks because succumb is a word for Washington idiots.

@realDonaldTrump: Today the 20 wealthiest people own more wealth than the bottom 150 million. When I’m president, everyone will be one of those people.

@realDonaldTrump: In many inner cities, kids now stand a greater chance of ending up in jail than ending up with a college degree. Losers!

@realDonaldTrump: We should be outraged at how many people in this country go to bed hungry every night, but they should be more outraged at themselves for not having jobs.

@realDonaldTrump: It is wrong that women are paid less than men for doing the same work, especially if they are hot.

@realDonaldTrump: This movement is sending a message to the billionaire class: our delusional worship of you will never end.

@realDonaldTrump: It’s embarrassing that so many leaders don’t recognize that climate change is a problem. Luckily I can’t feel embarrassment.

@realDonaldTrump: Change happens from the bottom up. That’s why I always pay attention to women’s bottoms.

@realDonaldTrump: No American is free until all Americans are free to not see what is right before their own eyes.

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