On Wednesday, Burger King reached out to its rival McDonald’s, proposing that the two chains come together to create a hybrid of their signature burgers, the Whopper and the Big Mac. McDonald’s declined Burger King’s proposal to make the so-called McWhopper, which was publicized in full-page ads in the New York Times and Chicago Tribune.
We’re not too upset about McDonald’s rejection, though, because really, the McWhopper just isn’t that exciting. We’ve got a few ideas for way more outrageous (yet totally marketable) unions between fast food chains.
Starbucks + Chipotle = Pumpkin Spice Guacamole. Sometimes a busy young woman just doesn’t have time to visit both Starbucks and Chipotle, especially in autumn when she’s got an apple-picking date to get to. That’s why we need to combine both chain’s signature flavors.
Subway + Einstein’s = Footlong Bagel. Sometimes bagels are just too small. This is America, so if you want a bagel that measures 12 inches across, it’s your right. (Ideally, this would come with a small bucket of cream cheese in your choice of three flavors.)
McDonald’s + Bojangles = American Poutine. For an American twist on a classic Canadian dish, combine McDonald’s iconic fries with Bojangles’ gravy and mac and cheese.
Auntie Anne’s + Panda Express = Soft Pretzel Chopsticks. You should get a reward for using chopsticks to eat your fried rice or beef and broccoli, and that reward should obviously be that the chopsticks are made out of soft pretzels.
Pizza Hut + IHOP = Pancake Pizza. This is pretty simple: it’s a pizza, but where you’d normally find pizza dough, you instead find a pancake. This could work well as a breakfast item (think pizza with ham or bacon and a fried egg on it) or an anytime item.
Arby’s + Taco Bell = Meat Tornado. This could also be known as the Ron Swanson Special. It would combine Arby’s Meat Mountain with Taco Bell’s meatiest burrito.
Crumbs + Jamba Juice = Cupcake Smoothie. Finally, a totally healthy way to enjoy a cupcake. You just blend it up with some fruit. Done!
Domino’s + Krispy Kreme = Pepperoni Pizza Doughnuts. Pizza bagels are simply too healthy, so let’s make pizza doughnuts instead.
Chik-fil-a + KFC = Chicken Sandwich on Fried Chicken Buns. KFC offers the Double Down sandwich, which consists of bacon and cheese wedged between two chicken fillets, which serve as buns. Why not bring Chik-fil-a’s beloved chicken sandwiches into the mix to offer a chicken sandwich on chicken buns? Everyone loves chicken. Super marketable.
QUIZ: Should You Eat This or That?
Which is better for you: Half cup of ice cream or 3 scoops of sorbet?Getty Images (4)Answer: A half cup of ice cream
If you eat what you’re craving, you’re more likely to feel satisfied and eat less. And scoop for scoop sorbet contains twice the sugar with none of the filling dairy protein and fat.Getty Images (5); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: Real butter or spray on fake butter?Getty Images; Tara Johnson for TIMEAnswer: Butter
Serving size for spray butters (even low-calorie ones) are around a 1/3 second spray. What on earth does that mean? You're better off using a small amount of real butter as opposed to guessing how much you're using of the mystery melange of up to 20 ingredients.Getty Images (1); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: A turkey burger or a sirloin burger?Getty Images (2)Answer: Sirloin burger
Restaurant turkey burgers are often made with dark meat and the skin, so they’re not necessarily better for you (and for the record, they aren't low-fat). You can get a sirloin burger that’s 95% lean meat and gives you 20 g of protein. Just be careful with the toppings.Getty Images (1); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: Almonds or pretzels?Getty Images (2)Answer: Almonds
Almonds are high in protein, fiber and fat and will keep you feeling fuller longer. Give high-sodium pretzels about an hour and you'll feel hungry again thanks to the high-carb no-fat or protein content.Getty Images (1); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: Special K or eggs?AP; Getty ImagesAnswer: Eggs
In the morning, you want a meal that will fill you up. Eggs offer protein and fat for satiety, but Special K cereal really only offers carbs and, well, air. If you want carbs to kick off the day, you're better off pairing eggs with a slice of 100% whole grain toast. Getty Images (1); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: Fat free salad dressing or regular salad dressing?Tara Johnson for TIMEAnswer: Regular salad dressingTo absorb fat soluble vitamins like Vitamins E and K in vegetables you need to consume them with a fat to aid nutrient absorption. Fat-free dressing, meanwhile, is low-calorie but gets its flavor from added sugar and salt.Tara Johnson for TIME (5); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: A low fat cookie or dark chocolate?Getty Images (2)Answer: Dark chocolate “People believe fat free is calorie free,” says Keri Gans, a registered dietitian in New York City. “Go for the real thing.” Fat free cookies tend to be high in carbs, sugar and fake sugar. Try a nice piece of antioxidant-rich dark chocolate instead.Getty Images (2); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIMEWhich is better for you: Low fat Greek yogurt or 100 calorie Yoplait yogurt?Tara Johnson for TIMEAnswer: 2% Greek YogurtA little fat is good in the morning to keep you full—plus it has upwards of 17g of protein per container. Fat-free "fruit" yogurt is high in sugar—7 to 10 g per serving—and lower in protein.Tara Johnson for TIME (2); Gif by Mia Tramz for TIME
