She thought it was a pirate. That’s what she told 911 when she called for help, that a pirate was attacking her car with a sword. As it turns out, it was a “high elf”.
The woman, who chose to remain anonymous, was driving in the southeast section of Portland, Oregon, when a man wearing a helmet and shield and carrying a sword and staff ran into traffic and started attacking her BMW. As is the recommended course of action in such circumstances, she called 911 and explained the situation. Police responded to the call, and when they arrived on the scene, they found Konrad Bass dressed in chain mail, holding a sword. The woman’s car had several puncture marks.
Bass told officers that he wasn’t a pirate, but was a “high-elf engaged in battle with the evil Morgoth.” He also told officers that he had taken LSD, which may be the reason he believed a BMW was an instrument of Morgoth, the evil villain from J.R.R. Tolkein’s “Lord of the Rings” prequel, “The Silmarillion”.
He was taken to the hospital and cited for criminal mischief, but was not booked into jail.
[Via KATU]
MORE: Police: Naked Man Doing Push Ups in the Street Hit and Killed by Car
MORE: Naked Guy High On Embalming Fluid Shouts ‘SURFBORT’ in Beyoncé Voice
More Must-Reads from TIME
- Donald Trump Is TIME's 2024 Person of the Year
- Why We Chose Trump as Person of the Year
- Is Intermittent Fasting Good or Bad for You?
- The 100 Must-Read Books of 2024
- The 20 Best Christmas TV Episodes
- Column: If Optimism Feels Ridiculous Now, Try Hope
- The Future of Climate Action Is Trade Policy
- Merle Bombardieri Is Helping People Make the Baby Decision
Contact us at letters@time.com