Pop Chart

SHOCKING

Pushing the “celebrity”-memoir threshold even further, KATHY GRIFFIN sells hers for a rumored $2 million

NICKY HILTON makes a citizen’s arrest–at an IHOP. The recession has hit us all

BEYONCE’S Oscar performance of “At Last” threatens to reignite feud with ETTA JAMES

Third lowest ever rated Oscars declared success

TOM HANKS to switch on Hadron Collider. We always knew Forrest Gump was smarter than he looked

ANDY RICHTER to reunite with CONAN as Tonight Show announcer

Old, sucky BATTLESTAR GALACTICA might beat new, awesome Battlestar Galactica to big screen

TRACY MORGAN in fish-tank-fire incident. 30 Rock writes itself

PREDICTABLE

The late TAMMY FAYE and PAMELA ANDERSON: Separated at birth?

THE LOVE GURU wins worst-picture-of-the-year prize. M. Night Shyamalan loses last chance to win award of any kind

Change has not come to America. TROPICANA does an about-face on new OJ packaging

Third TWILIGHT film to be released in 2010, exactly six weeks after eventual death of vampire craze

NICOLE RICHIE realizes that getting pregnant is the only way she can gain weight

JENNA JAMESON’S perfume line: lilac, orange blossom and crippling regret

KIM KARDASHIAN regrets renting that chimp after all

SLUMDOG kids live it up at Disneyland

SHOCKINGLY PREDICTABLE