DEPARTMENT
“This week the Israeli government began moving thousands of Jewish settlers from the Gaza Strip. Officials say once the area is cleared of all Jews, the land will be renamed Utah.” –CONAN O’BRIEN
“According to a poll in USA Today, 40% of Mexicans say they would move to the U.S. if they had the chance. The other 60% are already here.”
–JAY LENO
“A recent checkup showed [President Bush] is arguably the healthiest Chief Executive ever. His secret? Daily exercise and a near total disengagement with reality.”
–JON STEWART
For more political humor, visit time.com/cartoons
More Must-Reads from TIME
- Breaking Down the 2024 Election Calendar
- How Nayib Bukele’s ‘Iron Fist’ Has Transformed El Salvador
- What if Ultra-Processed Foods Aren’t as Bad as You Think?
- How Ukraine Beat Russia in the Battle of the Black Sea
- Long COVID Looks Different in Kids
- How Project 2025 Would Jeopardize Americans’ Health
- What a $129 Frying Pan Says About America’s Eating Habits
- The 32 Most Anticipated Books of Fall 2024
Contact us at letters@time.com