Business & Finance: Juneau Joke

As everyone knows, stockmarketeers in Manhattan’s Wall Street are traditionally tense. But it would be a mistake to suppose they never joke or jest. A typical Wall Street joke:

First Trader: Do you know anything good?

Second Trader: Get in on Alaska Juneau.

If the First Trader winks appreciatively, slaps his thighs, it is a Knowing Joke. But if, new to his business, he smiles gratefully and proceeds to buy Alaska Juneau, it becomes a Practical Joke. In either case, it is a huge success.

For of all the stocks on the Big Board, Alaska Juneau Gold Mining Co. has been the dullest and dreariest. Back in 1919, it cost $2.85 a share; in 1923, one could buy it for 25¢. But for the most part, it hovered around $1. And there, for a jest, three potent stockmarketeers bought it in large blocks as the wittiest of all possible Christmas gifts to their wives.

Last week, three wives of three potent stockmarketeers debated whether or not to sell their holdings of Alaska Juneau. They knew, of course, that the stock had appreciated in value just 1,000% since its purchase, had hit a high of $10 a share. But might it not go still higher? Amused, they looked at income reports, noted that 1927 deficits ranged from $3,500 to $43,000 monthly, while monthly earnings in 1928 exceeded $50,000, occasionally hit $100,000.

Thus stockmarketeers wives savored the cream of Wall Street’s typical, traditional jest.