OHIO: Demetrios, I Hate You

On one corner Demetrios P. Diakandru ran the 79th Street Restaurant. On the other Tom Petropulos ran the Old Transfer Restaurant.

For 22 years each stared across the street at his rival’s window signs, his rival’s customers, the cash-register figures. Finally they decided they hated each other. On the sly, cunning Mr. Petropulos leased Mr. Diakandru’s building. On the quiet, crafty Mr. Diakandru bought Mr. Petropulos’ building. Grinning slyly, Mr. Petropulos served an eviction notice. Grinning right back, Mr. Diakandru gave his foe an eviction notice, too.

The case went to Cleveland Municipal Court nine times, to the Court of Appeals five times, even got to the Ohio Supreme Court. Last week the rivals emerged with a draw. Thereupon Mr. Petropulos promptly evicted Mr. Diakandru. In jig-time, Mr. Diakandru evicted Mr. Petropulos. All afternoon they trudged heavily across the street, toting pots & pans, stoves, stools, counters, ice cream, beer bottles. Suddenly a lawyer appeared with a new court order: the evictions were all off; the rivals must move right back into their own cafés.

Across the street again, to status quo, went the pots & pans, the stoves and the beer. Said dizzy Mr. Diakandru: “What happened you wouldn’t have expected. This is awful. . . .” For once, Mr. Petropulos was silent. He couldn’t think of a thing to do.