--- title: Why Women Should Stop Striving for Work-Life Balance description: Listen to Ruth Soukup discuss why women should strop striving for balance in their lives on her Do It Scared podcast. canonical: https://time.com/5311593/work-life-balance-women/ author: Ruth Soukup article:opinion: false article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2018-06-14T15:49:58.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:44:49.860Z og:title: Why It's Time to Stop Striving for Balance and Just Embrace Reality og:description: Ruth Soukup's podcast, Do It Scared, breaks down why we should all go easier on ourselves og:url: https://time.com/5311593/work-life-balance-women/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt7da711c8f7c1a0e8/698933107cdbac1843d5d273/women-work-life-balance.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 5119 og:image:height: 2879 og:image:alt: Work-Life Balance, Do It Scared Podcast og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Why It's Time to Stop Striving for Balance and Just Embrace Reality twitter:description: Ruth Soukup's podcast, Do It Scared, breaks down why we should all go easier on ourselves twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt7da711c8f7c1a0e8/698933107cdbac1843d5d273/women-work-life-balance.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # Why It's Time to Stop Striving for Balance and Just Embrace Reality > Sponsored content. 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Worth Your Time is TIME's culture recommendation newsletter, edited by culture editor Eliza Berman. Each week it surfaces the books, shows, films and ideas TIME's editors think are worth your attention, and explains why. It is free at time.com/newsletters. #### Does TIME have a culture newsletter? Yes. Worth Your Time is TIME's culture newsletter, published weekly. #### Who writes TIME's culture recommendations? Culture editor Eliza Berman writes Worth Your Time, drawing on TIME's critics and culture desk. #### Is Worth Your Time free? Yes. It is a free newsletter available at time.com/newsletters. ### Sources * TIME Newsletters: [time.com/newsletters](/c/time-nl-worth-2026q3/newsletters?i=361b4d10-6f2c-4f3e-b96c-e4d0fad937ab&cr=time-nl-worth-2026q3-v1) ## Video: 4 Tips for Achieving Work-Life Balance [Watch (HLS stream): 4 Tips for Achieving Work-Life Balance](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/MMt5sX1N.m3u8) (1:34)  _Published 2015-12-08. Financial blogger Catherine Alford discusses how parents can effectively balance work and home life._ by [Ruth Soukup](https://time.com/author/ruth-soukup/) ## Ruth Soukup Jun 14, 2018 3:49 PM UTC  Striking the perfect balance in your life might be an unreasonable expectation. Striking the perfect balance in your life might be an unreasonable expectation. JGI—Getty Images/Blend Images by [Ruth Soukup](https://time.com/author/ruth-soukup/) ## Ruth Soukup Jun 14, 2018 3:49 PM UTC Ever feel like you are completely failing at this whole [balance thing](http://time.com/43808/how-to-achieve-work-life-balance-in-5-steps/)? Yep, me too. In fact, most of the time, I feel like just making it to the end of the day with my sanity still intact is a major accomplishment. As a [working mom with a demanding job](http://time.com/money/5272659/working-moms-better-kids/), it sometimes feels utterly impossible to be everything to everyone, all the time. I constantly feel the pull in all directions, and the weight of the fact that every time I choose to focus my attention in one area of my life, I am by default not choosing someone or something else. And yet, as women, we seem to have this idea in our heads that we’re supposed to be completely balanced in all areas of our life at all times, whether it be in our career, as a parent, in our homes, with our [health and fitness](http://time.com/5296639/streaming-exercise-peloton-workout/) or with our hobbies and spiritual life. For whatever reason, we’re made to believe that if we somehow can’t juggle all of these balls successfully, we’ve fallen short. There’s even a name for this phenomenon: [mom guilt](http://time.com/4989068/motherhood-is-hard-to-get-wrong/). But even women who aren’t moms feel this way. Guilt, after all, isn’t unique to mothers. It can originate from that little voice inside all of our heads that’s constantly telling us that our lives are out of whack, and that we need to be doing more in order to feel fulfilled. And the voice is always there. All. The. Time. But what if balance doesn’t actually exist? What if that little voice is lying to us? And worse yet, what if all this striving for balance is actually what’s holding us back? Maybe our desire for balance is completely wrong. That’s why it’s time to silence that voice once and for all. It’s OK to become obsessive and [strive for perfection](http://content.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1733856,00.html) on the things that truly matter to us and are important, but we can’t be everywhere at once or everything to everyone. If you’ve ever felt as if you’re failing at striking the right balance in your life, this latest [Do It Scared podcast](https://doitscared.com/) sheds some light on why you should cut yourself some slack and learn to appreciate the value you bring to the table. ## Transcript [ MUSIC ] Instead of trying for a work- life balance, everyone always discusses like it should be compartmentalized. To me I think work- life balance is what you make of it, it's not as strict as work nine to five, have your family in the evenings. If you really want something, you wanna start a business, You can balance it and you know go back and forth throughout the day and still be able to pay attention to both things. The biggest thing is that you have to ask for help when you need it. For the longest time I insisted that I clean my house. I wanted to be like the good mom and have everything clean, and until I realized I could hire someone and I could make Double the amount I paid her to help me clean my house in the time she was cleaning it. And so I think learning to be smart about your decisions, outsource when you need it. I think is the best thing that any parent can do, who's trying to balance their work and their life. If a parent is at work and they want more flexibility, or they feel like they aren't seeing their families, they really need to seek out the jobs that will allow for that flexibility. You see them all the time in different In newspapers and different reports online of companies that are know for their work life balance, so. And you have to be bold enough to ask. I think there's always been this stigma that if you're a working parent you ask for time off, or you ask to get off early that you're seen as a lesser worker. But really when it comes to a workplace environment, as long as you're Superior and your boss is happy with what you're doing. They know you're working hard. And it doesn't really matter what anybody else thinks, as long as the people above you who are responsible for your job think that you're doing a great job. 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