--- title: Gwyneth Paltrow Talks Incredibly Painful Divorce description: Find out what Gwyneth Paltrow told the Edit about her painful divorce from Chris Martin and her response to criticism about her brand, Goop. canonical: https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/ author: TIME article:opinion: false article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2017-06-01T14:08:59.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-04-13T09:05:41.833Z og:title: Gwyneth Paltrow Calls Divorce the ‘Most Difficult Thing I’ve Ever Done' og:description: ‘I wanted to turn my divorce into a positive' og:url: https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltee6f7fe81657ab76/6988cfb897cdff5b226b0f67/gwyneth-paltrow-divorce.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: Fast Company With Gwyneth Paltrow And Goop At FC/LA: A Meeting Of The Most Creative Minds og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Gwyneth Paltrow Calls Divorce the ‘Most Difficult Thing I’ve Ever Done' twitter:description: ‘I wanted to turn my divorce into a positive' twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltee6f7fe81657ab76/6988cfb897cdff5b226b0f67/gwyneth-paltrow-divorce.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # Gwyneth Paltrow Calls Divorce the ‘Most Difficult Thing I’ve Ever Done' by [Mike Miller / People](https://time.com/author/people/) ## Mike Miller / People Contributor Jun 1, 2017 2:08 PM UTC  SANTA MONICA, CA - MAY 16: Gwyneth Paltrow speaks at Fast Company with Gwyneth Paltrow and Goop at FC/LA: A Meeting Of The Most Creative Minds on May 16, 2017 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Vivien Killilea/Getty Images for Fast Company) SANTA MONICA, CA - MAY 16: Gwyneth Paltrow speaks at Fast Company with Gwyneth Paltrow and Goop at FC/LA: A Meeting Of The Most Creative Minds on May 16, 2017 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Vivien Killilea/Getty Images for Fast Company)Vivien Killilea—Getty Images for Fast Company by [Mike Miller / People](https://time.com/author/people/) ## Mike Miller / People Contributor Jun 1, 2017 2:08 PM UTC [Gwyneth Paltrow](http://people.com/tag/gwyneth-paltrow/) made divorce look easy when she [consciously uncoupled](http://people.com/movies/gwyneth-paltrow-opens-up-about-chris-martin-divorce/) from [Chris Martin](http://people.com/tag/chris-martin/) three years ago, but now the actress says the experience was one of the hardest in her life. “I wanted to turn my divorce into a positive,” Paltrow, 44, tells [_The EDIT_](http://www.net-a-porter.com/magazine/404/12). “What if I didn’t blame the other person for anything, and held myself 100% accountable? What if I checked my own s— at the door and put my children first? And reminded myself about the things about my ex-husband that I love, and fostered the friendship?” Maintaining that positive attitude, Paltrow admits, was the hard part. “What I put myself through to get there was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done in my life,” she explains. If she has any regrets from the breakup, coining the much-derided phase [“conscious uncoupling”](http://people.com/celebrity/gwyneth-paltrow-explains-conscious-uncoupling/) is not one of them. “People are coming around. I know it’s a dorky term, but it’s very worthwhile,” she says. “I’m always the person who gets s— at first, but then later people say, ‘Hey, maybe that’s a good idea.’ I don’t mind.” For Paltrow, the criticism over the phrase was just another example of the blowback she feels she has received since rebranding herself as a lifestyle guru with her website Goop. “It’s got a few layers to it,” she says of the backlash. “People were fine with me as an actress, but with Goop it was like, ‘Stay in your lane.’ Women in general get a lot of pushback, especially if you’re successful and attractive … I’m not saying I’m attractive. I mean when you’re considered attractive.” Ultimately she sees the divorce, like other major turning points in her life, as an opportunity for growth. “I’ve had an extraordinary life, where things have happened in a huge way – huge success, huge joy, huge pain, huge loss,” she says. “And the reason I feel happy today is because I’ve milked the f—– out of every opportunity. I haven’t made one mistake that I haven’t used as a stepping stone to get somewhere else. I’m ruthless when it comes to using the hard things.” As for her kids with Martin, Apple, 13, and Moses, 11, Paltrow says both have adjusted well to life in the spotlight. “They passed laws a couple of years ago about \[paparazzi\] not harassing children, so I take them everywhere with me like a shield – they’re good for something!” she joked. “My kids can handle \[fame\]. They know their lives are extraordinary,” she added. “And girls today are allowed to be anything; they’re self-possessed, confident, they like themselves. In Apple’s peer group, I don’t see the insecurity I saw at that age.” ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/"},"headline":"Gwyneth Paltrow Calls Divorce the ‘Most Difficult Thing I’ve Ever Done'","datePublished":"2017-06-01T14:08:59.000Z","dateModified":"2026-04-13T09:05:41.833Z","description":"‘I wanted to turn my divorce into a positive'","url":"https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/","keywords":["motto","Divorce","relationships","Gwyneth Paltrow"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltee6f7fe81657ab76/6988cfb897cdff5b226b0f67/gwyneth-paltrow-divorce.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Mike Miller / People"}],"articleSection":"","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltee6f7fe81657ab76/6988cfb897cdff5b226b0f67/gwyneth-paltrow-divorce.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"Fast Company With Gwyneth Paltrow And Goop At FC/LA: A Meeting Of The Most Creative Minds","caption":"Fast Company With Gwyneth Paltrow And Goop At FC/LA: A Meeting Of The Most Creative Minds","creditText":"Vivien Killilea—Getty Images for Fast Company","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/tag/motto/","name":"motto"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/4801165/gwyneth-paltrow-calls-divorce-the-most-difficult-thing-ive-ever-done/","name":"Gwyneth Paltrow Calls Divorce the ‘Most Difficult Thing I’ve Ever Done'"}}]}] ```