--- title: ADHD: My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace description: "When my friend shared a single Facebook post on ADHD, it changed my life. I realized that I wasn't any of those negative labels." canonical: https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/ author: Caitlin Liebenberg article:opinion: false article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2016-07-12T14:57:38.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-04-13T09:02:54.993Z og:title: My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace og:description: Knowing you’re not alone can be the key to survival og:url: https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt60cd1901686ad90d/69887b49524fc05e9fdf6859/confusion-mental-health-self-betterment.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: confusion-mental-health-self-betterment-motto-stock og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace twitter:description: Knowing you’re not alone can be the key to survival twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt60cd1901686ad90d/69887b49524fc05e9fdf6859/confusion-mental-health-self-betterment.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace by [Caitlin Liebenberg](https://time.com/author/caitlin-liebenberg/) ## Caitlin Liebenberg Jul 12, 2016 2:57 PM UTC  Peechaya Burroughs for TIME by [Caitlin Liebenberg](https://time.com/author/caitlin-liebenberg/) ## Caitlin Liebenberg Jul 12, 2016 2:57 PM UTC After years of suffering from mental health problems, it only took 4 months for my life to completely change. I’d been depressed, anxious and addicted to anything that made me feel less. For 8 years, my life became more and more rancid. I lived through many cycles of trying so hard to be better, to be the me I wanted to be, followed by bouts of extreme lows and almost deaths. But a switch went off when I started pursuing a diagnosis — ADHD and borderline personality disorder with medical professionals — at 24\. But I have also come to realize this is not the end of the world – it’s not even close. My diagnosis became a saving grace. Before I knew that my brain is wired in a different way, I would beat myself up and assume I was “incapable,” “wrong” or “useless.” But when my friend shared a single Facebook post on ADHD, it changed my life. I realized that I wasn’t any of those negative labels or identities. The diagnosis wasn’t an immediate relief: It was heart-wrenching, especially at the beginning – how had I suffered for so long without knowing what was really going on inside of me? But I pushed past this frustration and [challenged myself to be healthier in all aspects of my life](http://motto.time.com/4279644/boost-mental-strength/). That became all the more do-able when I realized I was supported by an incredible network of friends and professionals who don’t judge me just for being me. I got to a point where I felt like I could keep on going. But now, looking back, I wonder how I let my mental health get to such a bad point. Why did I end up tethered to tubes in intensive care at 23 if all it took to start turning my life around was intense management skills, support and therapy? I realize, in hindsight, that[ it’s because I was ashamed](http://motto.time.com/4352130/kristen-bell-frozen-depression-anxiety/). I didn’t realize that I wasn’t alone in struggling with thoughts of emptiness, feelings of lethargy and apathy. In today’s society, the pursuit of happiness and perfection have become a toxic denial of personal struggles and of pain. And that’s why talking about [mental health is so important](http://motto.time.com/4151791/bad-habits-mental-health/). Maybe if I had known that I wasn’t alone, things would have been different. Maybe if I hadn’t felt that unless I was perfect I was worthless, I wouldn’t have tried to throw myself away at the smallest mistake. Now I speak about my mental health issues with everyone. Because hearing about it saved my life. The hardest thing I’ve done is tell people I love when and if I’m not OK. And yes, I have lost some people along the way. The reactions differ. Those who understand say thank you and offer support. Those who don’t look a bit worried and offer support. The ones who frustrate me most are the people who say, “Everyone’s different in their own way,” as it belittles the struggles I face on a day to day basis sometimes just to hold it together. **_Read more:_**[_Read Prince William’s Touching Message About Mental Health_](http://motto.time.com/4376324/read-prince-williams-touching-message-about-mental-health/) But I realized that when I was truly being me, there were still many people who could truly love that person. I still go through ups, downs, arounds and inside outs, and that’s OK. I can’t help it. I’m not ‘mentally ill’ when I’m me, I’m mentally ill when I don’t allow myself to be me, and when I look after myself, I can manage it. Because I’m not alone. And neither are you. _Caitlin Liebenberg is a South African storyteller and experience designer living in London._ _Follow her on Facebook at_ [_Powered By Crazy_](https://m.facebook.com/PoweredByCrazy/)_._ ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/"},"headline":"My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace","datePublished":"2016-07-12T14:57:38.000Z","dateModified":"2026-04-13T09:02:54.993Z","description":"Knowing you’re not alone can be the key to survival","url":"https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/","keywords":["motto","ADHD","Mental Illness"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt60cd1901686ad90d/69887b49524fc05e9fdf6859/confusion-mental-health-self-betterment.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Caitlin Liebenberg","jobTitle":null,"url":"https://time.com/author/caitlin-liebenberg/"}],"articleSection":"","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt60cd1901686ad90d/69887b49524fc05e9fdf6859/confusion-mental-health-self-betterment.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"confusion-mental-health-self-betterment-motto-stock","caption":"confusion mental health self betterment motto stock","creditText":"Peechaya Burroughs for TIME","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/tag/motto/","name":"motto"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/4401509/mental-illness-adhd-depression-anxiety/","name":"My Mental Illness Diagnosis Was a Saving Grace"}}]}] ```