Chris Rock didn’t disappoint in his opening Oscars monologue. In fact, he spent most of his time onstage addressing the #OscarsSoWhite controversy head on.
Though some critics wanted the comedian to boycott the ceremonies after all 10 acting nominations were given to white actors for the second year in a row, Rock instead took the opportunity to skewer Hollywood racism and highlight the need for change. He also took shots at certain other actors and even the #AskHerMore campaign (led by Reese Witherspoon) that encourages red-carpet hosts to ask women about their roles and work, not just the dresses they are wearing.
Here are the 10 most blistering jokes he made at the beginning of the ceremony.
“If they nominated hosts, I wouldn’t get this job right now. You’d be watching Neil Patrick Harris right now.”
“People told me to quit [the Oscars] … the last thing I need is to lose another job to Kevin Hart … porno stars don’t make movies that fast.”
“We didn’t protest because we had real things to protest at the time. We were too busy being raped and lynched to care about who won best cinematographer.”
“Jada [Pinkett Smith] boycotting the Oscars is like me boycotting Rihanna’s panties. I wasn’t invited.”
“I understand Jada’s mad her man Will [Smith] was not nominated for Concussion … It’s also not fair that Will [Smith] was paid $20 million for Wild Wild West.”
“This year thing’s are going to be a little different … This year in the in-memoriam package, it’s just going to be black people that were shot by the cops on their way to the movies.”
“Hollywood is sorority-racist. ‘We like you, Rhonda, but you’re not Kappa.’”
“But things are changing. We got a black Rocky this year … that’s a big statement because Rocky takes place in a world where white athletes are as good as black athletes. So Rocky is a science-fiction movie.
“Jamie Foxx was so good in Ray that they went to the hospital and unplugged the real Ray Charles. It’s like, ‘We don’t need two of these.’”
“You’re not allowed to ask women what they’re wearing anymore. It’s a whole thing: you have to ‘ask her more.’ Everything’s not sexism. Everything’s not racism. They ask the men more because the men are all wearing the same outfits…If George Clooney showed up with a lime green tux on and a swan coming out his ass, someone would ask, ‘What are you wearing, George?’”
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