--- title: Happiness: How to Be Happier Without Really Trying description: Do not say “I should be at work right now” canonical: https://time.com/4017190/be-happy-without-trying/ author: Eric Barker article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2015-09-01T04:01:45.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-05-11T04:49:32.422Z article:section: Ideas og:title: How to Be Happier Without Really Trying og:description: Do not say “I should be at work right now” og:url: https://time.com/4017190/be-happy-without-trying/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltcd97c5359dfc60e7/698861a75f570f79b7b1d2d5/man-closed-eyes-content.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: man-closed-eyes-content og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: How to Be Happier Without Really Trying twitter:description: Do not say “I should be at work right now” twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltcd97c5359dfc60e7/698861a75f570f79b7b1d2d5/man-closed-eyes-content.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # How to Be Happier Without Really Trying ## Video: How to Maximize Happiness With Your Spending: An Economist Explains [Watch (HLS stream): How to Maximize Happiness With Your Spending: An Economist Explains](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/Ypg3UoAM.m3u8) (1:29)  _Published 2014-06-09. University of Michigan economist Justin Wolfers explains how best to spend your money to maximize happiness._ by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Sep 1, 2015 4:01 AM UTC  Germany, Bavaria, Munich, Mature man relaxing on sofa Germany, Bavaria, Munich, Mature man relaxing on sofaGetty Images by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Sep 1, 2015 4:01 AM UTC You are already a happiness expert. Seriously. You’re just a bit inconsistent. You already do a lot of things that researchers recommend for increased happiness. You just don’t realize it. And that’s the problem. If you did them more consistently those joyful times would be so much better and you’d be happier all around. They’re small, they’re silly, and you can do them without really trying. What the heck am I talking about? One of the key happiness principles is [savoring](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/02/happiest-people-in-the-world/). That’s a fancy term for really taking a second to appreciate those happy moments in your life. You often think that it’s the world that makes you happy but it’s really how you respond to the world. Those silly little things you do here and there in response to good moments; increasing those is the key to how to be happier without really trying. Happiness researchers [Fred B. Bryant and Joseph Veroff](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV) looked at what works when it comes to savoring and came up with 10 simple activities that really make people happier. Like I said, you’ve done all these things. You just don’t do them often enough. Let’s change that… ## 1) Tell Friends “The Greatest Thing Happened To Me!” Share the good moments with friends. If they’re with you when it happens, turn to them and say, “Isn’t this awesome?” If they’re not with you, recount the story for them later. It’s that simple. Too simple to make a difference? Wrong. Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- If you do nothing else on this list, do this one. Does it matter who you share it with? Any friend is good. But the researchers say you can get a bigger boost by telling “others who are exuberant and outwardly expressive in sharing their joy.” Target those upbeat extroverts. This method is so powerful you can even do it alone. Ever said to yourself, “She is not going to believe this when I tell her!” You just made yourself happier. Merely thinking about sharing good moments with others gives you a boost. (To learn what research says the happiest people do every day, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/06/happiest-people/).) Okay, this is the most powerful savoring activity you already do… how can you take it to 11? ## 2) Mentally Instagram It Those pictures in your head of the good times? They’re really powerful. How many times have you looked back on them fondly? Reminiscing and being nostalgic are [effective types of savoring](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/05/time-travel/). So at that great dinner with friends or that perfect relaxing vacation, take a second to mentally snap a picture you’ll remember. The researchers call it “Memory Building.” And one of the reasons this method is so effective is because it amplifies #1\. The better the picture in your head, the better you can recall good moments and share them with others. Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- So [Instagram](https://instagram.com/bakadesuyo/) in your phone is good. But Instagram in your head is even better. (To learn the secret to being happier and more successful, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/09/be-more-successful/).) Now doing a crazy touchdown celebration might get players in trouble with the NFL, but those guys know something about happiness. Here’s what they can teach you about savoring… ## 3) Do a Touchdown Dance Ever achieved something you were proud of and told yourself, “I have waited so long for this moment.” Bingo. You just made a happy moment even happier. “Self-Congratulation” is a great savoring booster. In fact, the Latin root of “congratulate” is _congratulari_ and that means “to wish joy.” Just don’t take it too far. As the researchers point out, bragging isn’t a good idea. Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- You earned it. Don’t be afraid to pat yourself on the back a little. (To learn the recipe for a happy marriage, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/10/recipe-for-a-happy-marriage-2/).) Ever been to an amazing concert? You’ve probably done something else that boosted your happiness. Here’s how to make it work for you anywhere. ## 4) Close Your Eyes at the Concert The music is great so you close your eyes and really appreciate it. That’s savoring, Bubba. The researchers call it “Sensory-Perceptual Sharpening.” (No, you don’t need to remember that and there will not be a quiz at the end.) Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- You don’t need to wear noise-canceling headphones at the art museum, but you get the point. When the pleasure is coming in through one of your senses, really make an effort to focus on that and block everything else out. (To learn how to have a happy family, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/10/how-to-have-a-happy-family/).) So you’re not at a concert. You’re on vacation and it feels so good to not deal with all that stress. What magic words have you said that you need to say more often? ## 5) Say “I’m Normally at Work Right Now” The researchers labeled it “Comparing” and it really makes you appreciate those great moments at the beach. Contrast these great times with the times that ain’t so good. Or, if this sunny getaway is better than you thought it would be, compare it to your low expectations. Sometimes it’s really good to be wrong. (To learn how you can be happier at work, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/02/love-what-you-do/).) I promised this would be effortless, right? Okay, time to make good on that. ## 6) Be Zen and Don’t Think Anything at all If you’re having a blast and are totally in the moment, for god’s sake, ignore my ramblings and just _be there_. The researchers call this “Absorption.” It’s that “[flow](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/11/secret-enjoying-work/)” state everyone always talks about. When you’re immersed in a game with friends, or a Netflix binge that is so engrossing the world stops, go full Buddhist and stay in the zone. Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- (For more on how to mindfulness can make you happier, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/05/how-to-stop-worrying/).) But sometimes the moment overtakes you and you have to say something… Go right ahead. ## 7) Shout “HOORAY!” Yeah, sounds corny. But it works. Their fancy term is “Behavioral Expression.” Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- Did you catch that last part? (Or do you skip the quoted material? Caught you.) It can be deliberate. So even if you don’t naturally act excited, doing it anyway can make you happier. Let those good feelings out. (To learn how the 10 steps to raising happy kids, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/02/happy-kids/).) This next one is tricky. It sounds sad but it’s not. Trust me… ## 8) Remember: This Will End Seeing friends for that last time before you leave town, watching your kid leave home for college… Yeah, your heart aches a little but you also remember those times so fondly later. Reminding yourself that this good moment will end and that you need to enjoy it while it lasts — the research shows this actually makes you happier. They call it “Temporal Awareness.” You and I call it bittersweet. Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- And you don’t have to wait around for these moments. Reminding yourself that good things only last so long and are worthy of savoring puts you in the right state of mind to appreciate the happy times when they do come along. (To learn more about how ancient philosophers used the seemingly bad to feel very good — and how you can too — click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/01/ancient-philosophers/).) So how do you tie in some more of the happiness research with no real effort? Just do something you’ve done before that just happens to be the most proven method for making you smile more often… ## 9) Say “I Am so Lucky To Have This in My Life” [Gratitude](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/05/happy-all-the-time/) is the tactical nuke of happiness. Writing down three things you’re grateful for before you go to bed is probably [the most proven way to increase happiness](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/09/how-to-live-a-happy-life/) and I’ve recommended it so much that if you read my stuff regularly you are either nodding or rolling your eyes right now. So when you’re in the midst of a happy moment just say, “I am so lucky to have this in my life.” Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- You’ve done some version of this in the past. Do it more often. (For more on how gratitude can make you happier, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/05/happy-all-the-time/).) Okay, those nine things you do can really make the good times roll. Let’s mix it up for number ten: what should you not do? ## 10) Do Not Say “I Should Be Working Right Now” The researchers came up with a good name for this one: “Kill-Joy Thinking.” Via [Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805851208/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0805851208&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=OLBBEKCODIILPZQV): --- > “” --- Thinking for just a second you can see how this is the opposite of many of the good nine. It’s comparing, but not in a positive way. You’re not being in the moment and in flow. You’re thinking about how the moment could be better instead of feeling gratitude for how good it already is. And you’ve probably done this one too. Cut it out. Don’t be a kill-joy. (To learn the 3 ways to train your brain to be happy, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/12/train-brain-happy/).) Nine tiny things you do that you should do more often — and one thing you shouldn’t. Let’s round them up. ## Sum Up The little things that make good moments better (and the one that doesn’t): * **Tell friends “The greatest thing happened to me!”** Share good moments with others. * **Mentally Instagram it.** Take a picture with your mind to better share the moment later. * **Do a touchdown dance.** Congratulate yourself on achievements. * **Close your eyes at the concert.** Focus on the sense that’s bringing you joy. * **Say “I’m normally at work right now.”** Compare to the times that aren’t as good. * **Be Zen and don’t think anything at all.** Be in the moment. * **Shout, “HOORAY!”** Express happy feelings. * **Remember “This will end.”** Bittersweet is good. * **Say “I am so lucky to have this in my life.”** Show gratitude. * **Do not say “I should be at work right now.”** Don’t be a kill-joy. You’re already a happiness expert. You unknowingly do a lot of what it takes to enjoy life. Just do those things more often. And if you forget everything else, remember numero uno: share good experiences with others. If reading this made you happier, share it with friends. And with just the push of a button — you’re already on your way. **_This piece originally appeared on_** [**_Barking Up the Wrong Tree_**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/08/how-to-be-happier/)**_._** **Join over 205,000 readers. Get a free weekly update via email** [**here**](http://eepurl.com/o6uAD)**.** Related posts: [How To Stop Being Lazy And Get More Done – 5 Expert Tips](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/08/how-to-stop-being-lazy/) [How To Get People To Like You: 7 Ways From An FBI Behavior Expert](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/10/how-to-get-people-to-like-you/) [New Harvard Research Reveals A Fun Way To Be More Successful](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/09/be-more-successful/) _Read next:_ [_What 11 Successful People Wish They Knew About Money in Their 20s_](http://time.com/4012508/successful-money-advice-20s/?iid=time%5Freadnext) [_Download TIME’s mobile app for iOS to have your world explained wherever you go_](https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/time-mobile/id328218429) ### 5 Horrible Habits You Need to Stop Right Now  Do Not Email First Thing in the Morning or Last Thing at Night “The former scrambles your priorities and all your plans for the day and the latter just gives you insomnia,” says Ferriss, who insists “email can wait until 10am” or after you check off at least one substantive to-do list item. Chris Pecoraro—Getty Images  Do Not Agree to Meetings or Calls With No Clear Agenda or End Time “If the desired outcome is defined clearly… and there’s an agenda listing topics–questions to cover–no meeting or call should last more than 30 minutes,” claims Ferriss, so “request them in advance so you can ‘best prepare and make good use of our time together.'” Sam Edwards—Getty Images/Caiaimage  Do Not Check Email Constantly Batch it and check it only periodically at set times (Ferriss goes for twice a day). Your inbox is analogous to a cocaine pellet dispenser, says Ferriss. Don’t be an addict. Tools like strategic use of the auto responder and Boomerang can help. Jetta Productions—Getty Images  Do Not Carry a Digital Leash 24/7 At least one day a week leave you smartphone somewhere where you can’t get easy access to it. If you’re gasping, you’re probably the type of person that most needs to do kick this particular habit. by nacoki ( MEDIA ARC )—Getty Images/Flickr RF  Do Not Let People Ramble Sounds harsh, but it’s necessary, Ferriss believes. “Small talk takes up big time,” he says, so when people start to tell you about their weekends, cut them off politely with something like “I’m in the middle of something, but what’s up?” But be aware, not everyone agrees with this one (and certainly not in every situation), and you may want to pay particularly close attention to norms around chit chat when traveling internationally. 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