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---
description: Embracing the emotional experience of failure can enrich your sense of happiness
title: We Need to Accept Our Failures
image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blta15fb3003ba7e231/69885d16cd684822cd0a1083/man-standing-silhouette.jpg?branch=production&amp;width=1080&amp;quality=75&amp;auto=webp&amp;crop=16:9
---

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# We Need to Accept Our Failures


by 

[Shane Parrish](/author/shane-parrish/)


## Shane Parrish


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Aug 3, 2015 11:00 AM CUT

![man-standing-silhouette](https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blta15fb3003ba7e231/69885d16cd684822cd0a1083/man-standing-silhouette.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=3:2)

Man standing on pier at sunset

Man standing on pier at sunsetGetty Images

by 

[Shane Parrish](/author/shane-parrish/)


## Shane Parrish


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Aug 3, 2015 11:00 AM CUT

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> “”

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If failure is so ubiquitous you would think that it would be treated as a more natural phenomenon; not exactly something to celebrate but not something that should be hidden away either. In the book [The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0865478015/ref=as%5Fli%5Fqf%5Fsp%5Fasin%5Fil%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0865478015&linkCode=as2&tag=farnamstreet-20&linkId=TMFHOWR6MT3PKFOL "undefined"), Oliver Burkeman visits a ‘Museum of Failed Products’ and comes away with quite a few insights into our reluctance to accept, or even acknowledge, our less successful ventures.

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> “”

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I’ve spoken about Burkeman’s book before. There is a great chapter on the [flaws related to goal setting](http://www.farnamstreetblog.com/2014/02/oliver-burkeman-uncertainty/ "undefined") and another on the [Stoic technique of negative visualisation](http://www.farnamstreetblog.com/2012/12/the-secret-to-happiness-the-power-of-negative-thinking/ "undefined") but they all come back to the concept of turning towards the possibility of failure.

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> “”

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So what does it all mean? If avoiding failure is as natural as failure itself, why should you embrace it (or even attempt [an Antifragile way of life](http://www.farnamstreetblog.com/2014/10/an-antifragile-way-of-life/ "undefined")).

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> “”

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It’s almost jarring how simple and sensical that is, considering our aversion to failure.

Accepting failure is becoming more conversational, even if we’re a ways from embracing it. ‘Learning from our mistakes’ has become the new business mantra, replacing ‘being innovative.’ Although, I can see this quickly losing its shine when the mistake is idiotic.

Burkeman notes, it’s just too easy to imagine how the Museum of Failed Products gets populated (it is also worth noting that [successful products have a lot to do with luck](https://www.farnamstreetblog.com/2015/03/five-techniques-improve-luck/ "undefined").)

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> “”

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[The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0865478015/ref=as%5Fli%5Fqf%5Fsp%5Fasin%5Fil%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0865478015&linkCode=as2&tag=farnamstreet-20&linkId=TMFHOWR6MT3PKFOL "undefined") is an eye-opening look at how the pursuit of happiness is causing us to be more unhappy than ever.

**_This piece originally appeared on_** [**_Farnam Street_**](https://www.farnamstreetblog.com/2015/07/turning-towards-failure/ "undefined")**_._**

**Join over 60,000 readers and get a free weekly update via email** [**here**](http://www.farnamstreetblog.com/newsletter/ "undefined")**.**

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