--- description: She didn't care if she was for everybody--and that made her great. title: Remembering Joan Rivers: She Didn't Care If You Liked It image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt01accb029bbd98e6/6986a218361760392290db82/nup_152039_0001.jpg?branch=production&width=1920&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  * [Entertainment](/section/entertainment/) ## Entertainment Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close * [remembrance](/tag/remembrance/) ## remembrance Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close # Joan Rivers, RIP: Because Love Is Better Than Like by [James Poniewozik](/author/james-poniewozik/) ## James Poniewozik Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Sep 4, 2014 8:33 PM CUT  Kimora Lee Simmons, Kelly Osbourne, Joan Rivers and George Kotsioupoulos on an episode of Fashion Police Kimora Lee Simmons, Kelly Osbourne, Joan Rivers and George Kotsioupoulos on an episode of Fashion PoliceE! by [James Poniewozik](/author/james-poniewozik/) ## James Poniewozik Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Sep 4, 2014 8:33 PM CUT Joan Rivers was not for everybody. This is not speaking disrespectfully of the dead. Not in this case, anyway, when the subject–Rivers, [who died Sept. 4 ](http://time.com/3212274/joan-rivers-dead-81-remembrance/ "undefined")after complications from throat surgery–was so masterful at speaking disrespectfully while alive. Most remembrances of Rivers will probably involve stories of people with cause to dislike her: Johnny Carson, the mentor who cut her off after she started a rival talk show; the celebrities she filleted on her Fashion Police segments; the endless targets of her poison zingers. (She stepped in controversy nearly up to the end, as in July when she [referred to Michelle Obama](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hoxlqhukLxw "undefined") as “a transgender.”) And that’s why we remember her. Rivers didn’t need everybody to like her. Scratch that: Rivers needed not everyone to like her. She wasn’t about being fair or being a pleaser, and if she had an internal censor, it was a rubber stamp that said, “GO FOR IT!” She was a hoot and–as her documentary called her–[a piece of work](http://www.joanriversapieceofwork.com/ "undefined"), but she was about being authentic. (Even if, as concerned her much-joked-about plastic surgery, it was authentically owning inauthenticity: “When I die, [they will donate my body to Tupperware](http://www.vulture.com/2014/09/50-best-joan-rivers-jokes.html "undefined").”) She recalled Bill Cosby–responsible for her first _Tonight Show_ booking–[telling her](http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/06/18/joan-rivers-talks-about-plastic-surgery-hecklers-and-her-new-documentary-joan-rivers-a-piece-of-work/ "undefined"), “If you make 1% of the entire world laugh, you’ll fill stadiums.” That was a way of life for her, a way of comedy, even a kind of political statement. My colleage Eliana Dockterman wrote about [Rivers as a feminist icon](http://time.com/3267709/joan-rivers-dead-feminism-comedy/ "undefined"), and indeed she was the old-school embodiment of that new-school mantra for outspoken women attributed to Amy Poehler (via Tina Fey’s _Bossypants_): [“I don’t f-cking care if you like it.”](http://www.newrepublic.com/article/118735/problem-esquires-praise-42-year-old-women-amy-poehler "undefined") She was a glass ceiling-smasher and she knew it, but there is something in her approach to her work that speaks, in general, to any entertainer, any person passionate about anything, any person living in the world. In any line of work, in any life, there are pressures to make people happy, to be unobjectionable, to be for everybody. Listen to those voices too much, and you’ll lose your own. Not Rivers. She was 200% voice. There are already a million well-earned tributes out there to Rivers, her standup, her TV hosting, her commentary. But the example she set with her tongue-lashing career goes beyond those. Rivers’ lesson is not to be nasty, necessarily; not all of us have the gift to get away with insult comedy. Not to be rude, if that’s not your thing. But to be specific. To be you. There was plenty not to like about Joan Rivers. In the end, that was what there was to love about her. RIP. ### Joan Rivers: A Life of Laughter in Pictures  Joan Rivers, pictured here in 1965, was born Joan Alexandra Molinsky in Brooklyn N.Y. on June 8, 1933. Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images  Rivers got her big break on "The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson" in 1965. Dan Grossi—AP  Comedienne Joan Rivers making faces in a mirror on the street in New York City on March 1, 1966. Truman Moore—The TIME & LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images  Comedienne Joan Rivers wearing black mesh dress and heels, while talking on the phone in a bathtub in New York City on March 1, 1966. Truman Moore—The TIME & LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images  Joan Rivers lights a cigar for her husband Edgar Rosenberg after giving birth to baby Melissa Frida, 6lb 13.5 oz, in New York City on Jan. 20, 1968. New York Daily News/Getty Images  Joan Rivers, Dick Cavett, and Liza Minnelli on This Morning, Feb. 12, 1968. ABC Photo Archives/Getty Images  Ed McMahon and host Joan Rivers on Kraft Music Hall on Aug. 21, 1968. NBC/Getty Images  Comedian Rodney Dangerfield (L) and actress Joan Rivers wrapping up Dick Cavett (C) in a scene from the Portnoy's Complaint, Jan. 1, 1969. Arthur Schatz—The TIME & LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images  Joan Rivers with daughter Melissa at home in New York City in Nov., 1970. I C Rapoport/Getty Images  Producer Edgar Rosenberg and wife comedian Joan Rivers during the Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson 10th Anniversary party on September 30, 1972 in New York City. NBC/Getty Images  Actress Joan Rivers guest stars on "The Carol Bunett Show" on Dec. 13, 1975 in Los Angeles. CBS Photo Archive/Getty Images  One of the many accolades that Rivers received during her life was being named "Woman of the Year" by Hasty Pudding Theatricals, the Harvard University drama group in 1984\. She celebrated by riding a parade float through Harvard Square. Ted Gartland—AP  Rivers' celebrity gave her the opportunity to meet prominent figures in show business and politics, including Nancy Reagan in 1984. Bettmann/Corbis  Rivers, pictured in 1985 with star wrestler Hulk Hogan, became a regular guest host of the Tonight Show in the early 1980s and published "The Life and Hard Times of Heidi Abramowitz," a best-seller, in 1984. AP  Oprah Winfrey was one of the many that Rivers interviewed during her guest-hosting stints on "The Tonight Show" in 1986. NBC/Getty Images  By 1986, Rivers had been cut out of Carson's circle, having signed on to host "The Late Show Starring Joan Rivers" on Fox. Elton John, Cher and Pee Wee Herman joined Rivers for her first episode. Bob Galbraith—AP  Rivers remained on "The Late Show " for less than a year before leaving Fox in 1987 and starting her work on "The Joan Rivers Talk Show" in 1989. Nick Ut—AP  Joan Rivers is honored with a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on July 26, 1989, at Hollywood Boulevard in Hollywood Ron Galella—WireImage/Getty Images  Rivers, pictured with RuPaul in 1993, won a Daytime Emmy Award for hosting the eponymous "Joan Rivers Show" in 1990. Jim Cooper—AP  Rivers, pictured with Kelly Osbourne and daughter Melissa in 2012, became best-known to younger generations for hosting E!'s red carpet pre-awards show for the Oscars. A. Ariani—Splash News/Corbis  Pictured here at the Sundance Film Festival in 2010, Rivers remained active up to her death, hosting internet talk show with her daughter Melissa, "In Bed with Joan." Andrea Collins—WireImage/Getty Images ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/3270707/joan-rivers-dead-remembrance/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/3270707/joan-rivers-dead-remembrance/"},"headline":"Joan Rivers, RIP: Because Love Is Better Than Like","datePublished":"2014-09-04T20:33:04.000Z","dateModified":"2026-05-11T05:07:47.608Z","description":"She didn't care if she was for everybody--and that made her great.","url":"https://time.com/3270707/joan-rivers-dead-remembrance/","keywords":["remembrance","Television","Media","TV","joan rivers"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt01accb029bbd98e6/6986a218361760392290db82/nup_152039_0001.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"James Poniewozik","jobTitle":null,"url":"https://time.com/author/james-poniewozik/"}],"articleSection":"Entertainment","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt01accb029bbd98e6/6986a218361760392290db82/nup_152039_0001.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"Fashion Police - Season 2012","caption":"Fashion Police - Season 2012","creditText":"E!","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/section/entertainment/","name":"Entertainment"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"/tag/remembrance/","name":"remembrance"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/3270707/joan-rivers-dead-remembrance/","name":"Joan Rivers, RIP: Because Love Is Better Than Like"}}]}] ```