Briefing

THE WEEK

CANTOR COULDN’T WIN

GOOD WEEK

Derek Fisher

The five-time NBA champ was hired as the next coach of the New York Knicks

BAD WEEK

Dan Bylsma

The Pittsburgh Penguins coach was fired after six seasons and a Stanley Cup title

‘Thanks, Mom and Dad up in heaven, for disobeying doctors’ orders and not medicating their hyperactive girl.’

AUDRA MCDONALD, suggesting that ADHD meds would have stifled her creativity, while accepting the Best Dramatic Actress Award at the Tonys

$1,000

Tip a North Carolina Waffle House waitress had to return because it was too big to be charged to a credit card, per company policy; the tipper later gave the waitress a check

57,000

U.S. military veterans who have been waiting 90 days or more for their initial VA medical appointments, according to a new audit

‘I don’t want revenge… I want peace.’

PETRO POROSHENKO, Ukrainian President, after being sworn in; he has promised to quickly end the fighting with pro-Russian separatists in eastern Ukraine

‘We came out of the White House not only dead broke but in debt.’

HILLARY CLINTON, to ABC’s Diane Sawyer, on her family’s financial status following Bill Clinton’s presidency; after taking heat for her comments, she later said she “fully appreciate[s] how hard life is for so many Americans today”

‘SELF-DRIVING CARS AND TRUCKS ARE A MORAL IMPERATIVE.’

MARC ANDREESSEN, prominent Silicon Valley investor, in the wake of the car accident that injured Tracy Morgan and killed comedian James McNair

2,000

Estimated number of people who gathered in Kathmandu to set a Guinness World Record for simultaneous tree hugs, besting the 936 who did it in Portland, Ore., last year

‘[I’m] very ashamed of myself.’

STEVE COBURN, co-owner of California Chrome–the horse that was on track to win the Triple Crown before losing the Belmont Stakes–after ranting that other competitors were “cheaters”

Sources: ESPN, Fox News, CNN, AP, ABC News (2), Twitter, NPR, Yahoo