Miley Cyrus Says Playing Hannah Montana Caused Body Dysmorphia

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Playing a teen superstar who lived a double life wasn’t all that for Miley Cyrus.

The pop star told Marie Claire that her years of working on the Disney Channel show Hannah Montana gave her a false sense of what a young woman is supposed to look like.

“I was made to look like someone that I wasn’t, which probably caused some body dysmorphia because I had been made pretty every day for so long, and then when I wasn’t on that show, it was like, Who the f— am I?” she told the magazine.

Cyrus also recalled the requisite uniform she’d have to don to play the popular character from 2006 to 2011. “From the time I was 11, it was, ‘You’re a pop star! That means you have to be blonde, and you have to have long hair, and you have to put on some glittery tight thing.’ Meanwhile, I’m this fragile little girl playing a 16-year-old in a wig and a ton of makeup. It was like Toddlers & Tiaras. I had f—ing flippers.”

The hours on the show were so long and grueling that Cyrus’ mom considered whether to bring in lights to help treat her daughter’s seasonal affective disorder, the magazine reports. “Every morning, I was getting coffee jammed down my throat to wake me up,” said Cyrus, 22. “I just had to keep going, be tough, be strong. Everything happened to me on that set.”

The Cyrus cover story for Marie Claire hits newstands Aug. 18.

This article originally appeared on EW.com

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