--- title: What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider description: The discombobulation of a deal to someone whose identity was caught between two countries canonical: https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/ author: Saïd Sayrafiezadeh article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2015-07-16T15:37:20.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-02-22T09:17:37.998Z article:section: Ideas og:title: What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider og:description: The discombobulation of a deal to someone who was caught between two countries og:url: https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltd713f46849f21bd8/69885b233c1639df5c458dad/iran-us.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 5080 og:image:height: 2858 og:image:alt: A staff member removes the Iranian flag from the stage after a group picture with foreign ministers and representatives during the Iran nuclear talks at the Vienna International Center in Vienna og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider twitter:description: The discombobulation of a deal to someone who was caught between two countries twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltd713f46849f21bd8/69885b233c1639df5c458dad/iran-us.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider > Sponsored content. 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A paid TIME subscription is separate and available at time.com/subscribe-agent. by [Saïd Sayrafiezadeh](https://time.com/author/said-sayrafiezadeh/) ## Saïd Sayrafiezadeh Jul 16, 2015 3:37 PM UTC  A staff member removes the Iranian flag from the stage after a group picture with foreign ministers and representatives of Unites States, Iran, China, Russia, Britain, Germany, France and the European Union during the Iran nuclear talks at the Vienna International Center in Vienna on July 14, 2015. A staff member removes the Iranian flag from the stage after a group picture with foreign ministers and representatives of Unites States, Iran, China, Russia, Britain, Germany, France and the European Union during the Iran nuclear talks at the Vienna International Center in Vienna on July 14, 2015. Carlos Barria—Reuters by [Saïd Sayrafiezadeh](https://time.com/author/said-sayrafiezadeh/) ## Saïd Sayrafiezadeh Jul 16, 2015 3:37 PM UTC What is a pariah supposed to suddenly make of compromise and reconciliation? Until this week’s nuclear agreement, there’s hardly been any precedent for me. My primary emotion regarding Iran, at least since 1979, has been embarrassment—followed closely by shame. If there was ever a sense of pride it was minimal and impossible to sustain, especially growing up in Pittsburgh where Iranians were few, and where there was no escaping the glaring reality of my name, which marked me as a permanent and identifiable foreigner—and also a spokesman for a country that I barely knew anything about. The ideal spokesman and instiller of pride would have been my Iranian father, but he had left home when I was a baby (and later ran for president of Iran in 1980). My country was the United States, where I was born and raised by my Jewish-American mother, and where, for obvious reasons, I frequently felt like I didn’t belong. One of the great lessons of my upbringing is that one does not have complete autonomy when forging their own identity. Instead, it is cobbled together by various elements, including the way one is seen by others—the final result for me was the identity of the outsider, which I eventually embraced. But of all the psychological problems with which an outsider must contend—loneliness, humiliation, rage, etc.—the greatest difficulty might very well be the invitation one morning to be welcomed as an insider. Thus my discombobulation with the shocking development of an accord, with smiles all around. My familiar home of enmity appears to have been taken away—or at least restructured. All that remains now, of course, is a reckoning of the last 36 years. _Saïd Sayrafiezadeh was born in Brooklyn and raised in Pittsburgh. He is the author of the story collection,_ Brief Encounters With the Enemy_, a finalist for the_ [_2014 PEN/Robert W. Bingham Fiction Prize_](http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/06/18/pen-announces-shortlists-for-2014-book-prizes/)_, and the critically acclaimed memoir,When Skateboards Will Be Free, selected as one of the ten best books of the year by Dwight Garner of_ [_The New York Times_](http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/01/books/01garn.html)_._ ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"OpinionNewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/"},"headline":"What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider","datePublished":"2015-07-16T15:37:20.000Z","dateModified":"2026-02-22T09:17:37.998Z","description":"The discombobulation of a deal to someone whose identity was caught between two countries","url":"https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/","keywords":[],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltd713f46849f21bd8/69885b233c1639df5c458dad/iran-us.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Saïd Sayrafiezadeh","jobTitle":null,"url":"https://time.com/author/said-sayrafiezadeh/"}],"articleSection":"Ideas","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltd713f46849f21bd8/69885b233c1639df5c458dad/iran-us.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"A staff member removes the Iranian flag from the stage after a group picture with foreign ministers and representatives during the Iran nuclear talks at the Vienna International Center in Vienna","caption":"A staff member removes the Iranian flag from the stage after a group picture with foreign ministers and representatives during the Iran nuclear talks at the Vienna International Center in Vienna","creditText":"Carlos Barria—Reuters","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/section/ideas/","name":"Ideas"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/3960064/iranian-identity-outsider-insider/","name":"What Iranian Identity Means to an Outsider"}}]}] ```