“Funny obituary” may seem like an oxymoron, but the one that ran for Raymond Alan “Big Al” Brownley in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette after his September 21 passing is the latest humorous write-up to go viral on Legacy.com.
Here are the five best lines:
• “He despised canned cranberry sauce, wearing shorts, cigarette butts in his driveway, oatmeal, loud-mouth know-it-alls, Tabasco sauce, reality TV shows, and anything to do with the Kardashians.”
• “He was highly proficient at cursing. He liked four-letter words just about as much as four-wheel drive pick-up trucks.”
• “Big Al was known for his timeless words of wisdom, including ‘Life is hard; but it’s harder if you’re stupid’ and ‘Don’t be a jackass.'”
• “His famous holiday eggnog had enough whiskey to grow hair on your chest.”
• “He had a life-long ménage a trois with his homemade chili and Gas-X.”
And you can check out a roundup of some of the other hilarious viral obituaries here.
More Must-Reads from TIME
- Welcome to the Noah Lyles Olympics
- Melinda French Gates Is Going It Alone
- What to Do if You Can’t Afford Your Medications
- How to Buy Groceries Without Breaking the Bank
- Sienna Miller Is the Reason to Watch Horizon
- Why So Many Bitcoin Mining Companies Are Pivoting to AI
- The 15 Best Movies to Watch on a Plane
- Want Weekly Recs on What to Watch, Read, and More? Sign Up for Worth Your Time
Write to Tessa Berenson Rogers at tessa.Rogers@time.com