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# Ze Frank on Diplomacy (and Winking)

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## Video: Ze Frank on Diplomacy (and Winking)

[Watch (HLS stream): Ze Frank on Diplomacy (and Winking)](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/ruGDd8Od.m3u8) (3:29)

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_Published 2009-10-01. Why is Ze Frank winking? He's practicing the subtle art of diplomacy_


---

Jul 27, 2023 1:14 PM UTC

---

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---


## Transcript

>> So, the last couple of weeks we're all about diplomacy. Let's just recap for a second. We don't have much time. So, Obama scraps the long- range missile defense program and replaces it with a program designed to protect Europe and the Middle East from short- to medium- range missiles from Iran 'cause they're so scary. Critics say he just caved in to Russia, which didn't want more missiles in Poland. They're like, what do we get out of the deal? All right, shelf that for a moment. Last week, Libyan leader Gaddafi shows up at the U. N ., delivers this crazy long offensive speech and everybody focuses on what a crazy long offensive speech it was and forgets that he's actually the poster child for a rogue nation giving up their nuclear ambitions.

It turns out that the U. S. actually asked Gaddafi to talk to North Korea and Iran about doing the same thing and both those countries came back to him and said, well, what did you get out of the deal? So, shelf that. Last week, Iran disclosed the location of a secret nuclear facility with the International Anatomic Energy Association, but it turns out they disclosed it because they found out that we already knew about it. And then on Friday at the G- 20, which is like the real U. N ., Obama stands up and he says, " Aha, we caught you" even though he knew about it already and all the western leaders stand up and they say, " Aha, we caught you" even though they knew about it already.

But then from the corner of the room, Russia is like, " Aha, we caught you" and everybody is like, " Woah, Russia's on board ?" And they turn to Obama and they're like, " Is that what why you scrap the missile defense program ?" Meanwhile, back in Iran, their nuclear chief says that Obama's speech at the G- 20 was part of a plot designed to unite the whole world against them. And for once, an Iranian conspiracy theory is correct. And then as if they're reading from a deck of cue cards entitled, How to Screw Up More, they test fire a whole bunch of short- to medium- range missiles and all of this just days before they have to sit down and negotiate their nuclear program.

Now, I don't know how much of that is actual diplomacy 'cause everyone keeps on denying everything. But I do know that a lot people are suspicious about diplomacy with Iran and would rather opt for good old smashy smashy. I have to admit it is a little hard to figure out what diplomacy actually is like what they actually do. I sort of have this fantasy of diplomats being some kind of a cross between James Bond and Tim Gunn and there's Martinis and a lot of winking. And then in some back room, Obama is sitting down with [ unk ] and he's like, " You know, I have some republicans think I'm the anti- Christ.

Well, I am ." Not really. It's like a game but the rules are all weird and recently Obama got chastised for saying that the diplomatic efforts with Iran wasn't even about winning.

>> You know, this isn't a football game. So, I'm not interested in victory. I'm interested in resolving the problem.

>> But in a way, what I imagine Obama really meant was I am not interested in victory. Diplomacy isn't like football. Instead of just trying to win, you also have to try to convince the other side that they won. Or in the words of the Italia diplomat Daniele Vare, diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way. It might be hard for some people to stomach the thought of Iran even thinking that they won something, whatever that ends up being, but the alternatives don't look that great. Old school sanctions like depriving leaders of luxury goods don't really work on an Islamic theocracy.

They're just not that into caviar. Big crippling sanctions end up crippling ordinary Iranian people. And after the recent protest, those ordinary Iranian people have plenty of worldwide sympathy. And although we like to talk about military options and how we keep them on tables, we're running out of quarters for the [ unk ]. Even Secretary of Defense Robert Gate said that the best that a military strike will do is just buy us time. Personally, I think Americans love diplomacy. We like to watch it on television. That's what most of the reality shows are about. We like to settle our friends' arguments, but we like to be part of it.

We know how to support our troops, but we don't really know how to support or diplomats. Maybe little care packages with cologne and guides to small talk. So, right now, I'd like to say good luck and I hope that in this case you find a way to let Iran win.

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