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# Tips on How to Financially Support Your Adult Children

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## Video: Tips on How to Financially Support Your Adult Children

[Watch (HLS stream): Tips on How to Financially Support Your Adult Children](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/3zSyglL7.m3u8) (2:26)

![Tips on How to Financially Support Your Adult Children](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/v2/media/3zSyglL7/poster.jpg?width=720)

_Published 2016-07-12. Jill Schlesinger doesn't want you to hurt your retirement plan, so here's what she recommends._


---

Jul 27, 2023 8:23 PM UTC

---

## More From This Series

[All Videos](https://time.com/video/)

[Do It Yourself Financial Plans](/video/n1ZvR5Zh/)

### Do It Yourself Financial Plans

[Year-End Tax Tips with Jill Schlesinger](/video/IqlBe550/)

### Year-End Tax Tips with Jill Schlesinger

[Mannes on the Street: Supporting Adult Children](/video/J1Y5RDo3/)

### Mannes on the Street: Supporting Adult Children

---


## Transcript

The economy is well into the recovery phase, but nearly two thirds of Americans with adult children are still supporting them financially. Here to give us some advice about how to support them without enabling them is Jill Schlesinger, financial expert. Jill, thank you very much. Great to be here. This is one of my favorite topics. [ LAUGH ] So how can you minimize an adult child's dependence on you financially? It does start with having conversation. And I think the big problems that we see over time is that people don't really talk about the nature of how long is this going to last? How much am I really going to give you?

What do we want to do here? And then all of a sudden you're down the road and it's three years later and your kids have taken over your house, so Gotta have a conversation. Mm- hm. You're gonna talk about, what is the nature of the support I'm gonna provide to you. It's so much better if it's time- limited, right? Mm- hm. You say, okay. For the next six months, this is what we're going to do. And you then put it in writing and both sides agree to it. Now, are there different rules for if someone is just not making quite enough versus if it's a real emergency? I think emergencies are a whole different category, now.

What you define as an emergency and what your kids define as an emergency, may be some thing very different. So, obviously a job loss. A sudden job loss. I think a lot of people during the recession, stepped in, helped their adult children because they had a whole lifestyle they built up and then boom their job was gone. Then there's also a medical emergency. Of course you're gonna help your kids with that. But an emergency probably in your mind is not, my god, I had this trip scheduled and I really wanna keep it. That to me is where you need to draw the line. Now, all of this is assuming that the parents have ample funds to support.

But what if the parents really need to watch out for their own retirement, protect their own finances? Are there ways to balance that? Well, there are, and I think one of the most disturbing figures that we've seen recently is nearly half of the families that are giving support, the older generation says hey, my support of my child, my adult child. Child is hurting my own retirement. That is a terrible decision to make. I think in all of this, most important fact to remember is if I deplete all of my retirement assets, I'm gonna be a burden to my kids. They're gonna have to take care of me anyway.

And you remember, hey I'm not doing my kid any favors if I can't create a self sustaining, financially independent child. So set boundaries. [ UNKNOWN ] Boundaries, boundaries, and then more boundaries. Great. Jill, thank you so much. This is a great advice. Thank you. [ MUSIC ]

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