Breaking Up With Kermit Made Me Wonder

Question Everything Monogamy Miss Piggy
Getty Images; Photo Illustration by Mia Tramz for TIME

I refuse to give up on love

Question Everything Icon

I know why you’re asking moi this question. It’s because Kermit and I recently ended our fabulous, torrid, world famous romance—the longest-running interspecies love affair in the history of Hollywood. You naturally assume that I will say monogamy is obsolete. That when a frog breaks your heart and stomps on your dreams, you stop believing a committed relationship is possible. That in an era of “hook-ups” where even non-famous people can have fabulous, torrid romances via apparently unsecured internet computer services, monogamy is passé, over, done, kaput…pffft!

It’s true; if you had asked me this question right after you-know-who and I broke up, I might have agreed with you. But I’m a strong woman with a ridiculously successful career and a hit primetime television series, so I never give up on my dreams. And my dream is to once again be part of a monogamous relationship with a strong, handsome, supportive and preferably wealthy man. And I will pursue that dream no matter how many strong, handsome, supportive and preferably wealthy men I have to date in the meantime. If you qualify, I’m available; contact my agent for details.

Miss Piggy is an international celebrity, best-selling author, and fashion icon. Miss Piggy’s remarks were provided by The Muppets Studio

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