• U.S.

Miscellany, Oct. 5, 1942

2 minute read

Once a Trouper. In South Bend, unthinking Harry Holubiak pastured his work horse, an oldtime circus performer, near a field where Navy recruits drilled to band music. Later a vet treated the horse for exhaustion.

Cops & Robbers. In Manhattan, tired burglar went to sleep in Central Park with his swag, woke to find it gone complained to a cop, got arrested for burglary. In Indianapolis, a burglar got out of a building by calling out boldly: “Hey let me out of here!” The watchman obliged. In Kansas City, a young man who stole a truck explained to police that he had to, because the tires he had stolen a few minutes before were too heavy to carry. In Topeka, somebody stole all the buttons off Frank Coffman’s closetful of clothes. In Seattle, William B. Morris admitted he had been stealing jewelry and decorating trees with it.

I Love You, I Love You, I Love You. In Camden, N.J., nervous Mrs. Nellie Worth sued for divorce, complained that her husband hid her clothes, hid her false teeth, put itching powder in her bed, and strung a rope across the stairway.

Dolorosa. In Forest Hills, L.I., 19-year-old Dolores White, arrested for turning in a false fire alarm, offered the best explanation she had: she was despondent because her boy friend was in the Army.

1,260 Lollipops Later. In Camden, N.J., Bernard Skain, convicted of nonsupport, was sentenced to spend every night in jail for six months and to buy ice cream lollipops every day for each of his seven children.

Helpers. In Washington, D.C., when a streetcar conductor got off briefly to inspect a switch, playful passengers kept him off, took turns playing conductor along the route for 45 minutes before the motorman found out.

Utopia. In Truro, Mass., the town selectmen lost David Francis, the one-man police department, to the Coast Guard, decided he had been a luxury, decided not to replace him.

The Spirit, The Flesh. In Topeka, Kans., Patrolmen David Hummer and William Miller searched a woman prisoner, found in her purse: a Bible, a pint of whiskey.

Hawaii Moon. In Honolulu, boom days at the maternity hospitals were attributed to the first blackouts of last December.

Sea Birds. In Portland, Ore., Harold Parrett and George Kanary joined the Navy.

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