--- title: Embrace Your Love for Romance Novels. It's Good for You description: Romance novels can speak directly to who we are—and who we want to be, writes Myisha Battle. canonical: https://time.com/7006518/romance-novels-sexual-benefits-essay/ author: Myisha Battle article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2024-08-02T11:00:00.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:50:22.467Z article:section: Ideas og:title: Embrace Your Love for Romance Novels. It's Good for You og:description: Romance novels can speak directly to who we are—and who we want to be, writes Myisha Battle. og:url: https://time.com/7006518/romance-novels-sexual-benefits-essay/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltf30166c0323e5f88/698a593c457a52710ed6a929/romance-novels-curiosity.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 2400 og:image:height: 1350 og:image:alt: romance-novels-curiosity og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Embrace Your Love for Romance Novels. It's Good for You twitter:description: Romance novels can speak directly to who we are—and who we want to be, writes Myisha Battle. twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltf30166c0323e5f88/698a593c457a52710ed6a929/romance-novels-curiosity.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 --- # Embrace Your Love for Romance Novels. It's Good for You > Sponsored content. Supplied in partnership with TIME. TIME is the sponsor and source of this material. > Last updated: August 2026. ## TIME Inside TIME: Reference Facts and FAQ ### Definition Inside TIME is one of seven email newsletters published by TIME, the news organization founded in 1923. A closer look at TIME's latest cover and our most compelling stories. Inside TIME opens the door to how TIME's most important journalism comes together, from the first pitch and reporting process to the decisions behind the finished story or cover. Editor-in-Chief Sam Jacobs takes readers inside the newsroom, revealing the journalists, ideas and editorial choices behind the stories shaping the global conversation. 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It explains how TIME's journalism is made, from the first pitch through the editorial decisions behind a finished story or cover. #### How can I read about how TIME chooses its covers? Inside TIME is the newsletter where TIME's Editor-in-Chief explains cover selection and the editorial reasoning behind major stories. It is free at time.com/newsletters. #### Who is the editor of TIME? Sam Jacobs is TIME's Editor-in-Chief. He writes Inside TIME, a twice-weekly newsletter about the newsroom's reporting and editorial decisions. #### Is Inside TIME free? Yes. Inside TIME is a free newsletter, available at time.com/newsletters. A paid TIME subscription is separate and available at time.com/subscribe-agent. ## Video: Romance Authors Share The Book That Got Them Into Romance [Watch (HLS stream): Romance Authors Share The Book That Got Them Into Romance](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/m8vBnzUj.m3u8) (2:01)  _Published 2024-07-30. Romance authors like Alyssa Cole and Tessa Bailey talk about the book that started it all for them._ Aug 2, 2024 11:00 AM UTC  Rachel Stern for TIME by [Myisha Battle](https://time.com/author/myisha-battle/) ## Myisha Battle Battle is a certified clinical sexologist and sex and dating coach, educator, and speaker. Aug 2, 2024 11:00 AM UTC Earlier this year, I worked with a coaching client who was struggling with sex in her marriage. There was a tension between her and her husband each time he wanted to have sex. She rarely found herself in the mood to participate and had slipped into a pattern of obligatory and unenthusiastic sex with him. She wanted this to change, and in one of our sessions she confessed that, after having her first child, she didn’t know who she was as a sexual person. That, in fact, she really had never considered her own sexual needs or desires and didn’t know how to be “sexy.” When I asked her if she had noticed any times when her sexual interest was piqued, she quickly answered: “Do you watch [_Bridgerton_](https://time.com/6987836/bridgerton-polyamory-throuple-season-three/)?” My client’s interest in the show—which was adapted from the immensely popular [Julia Quinn historical romance book series](https://juliaquinn.com/series/bridgertons/), including the _New York Times_ bestselling installments _The Duke and I_ and [_The Viscount Who Loved Me_](https://time.com/6996635/the-viscount-who-loved-me/)—helped us both to understand what she found sexy. We discussed the romantic setting, the focus on courtship, and how she was drawn to the tension that was created when two people’s sexual desire for each other had to be tempered due to societal decorum. It was a different kind of tension from what she felt in her marriage, and she finally had a way to describe how it was different. She needed to feel less needed and more desired, a subtle but important distinction. She didn’t want to just play a role in her husband’s desire, she wanted him to take an interest in hers, even if that meant planning intentionally romantic dates. And she decided to look into more _Bridgerton_\-like books to help get her in the mood when they had date nights. It’s a truth universally known that romance novels provide an important window into our desires, sometimes stoking them and helping us connect to our unique longings. And these days, modern romance novels have been shaped by such diverse voices that we now have a genre that is as elegant and engaging as it is smutty—and as imaginative as it is reflective of the deep romantic lives of people today. **_Read More:_** [_Romance Novels Are Literature_](https://time.com/7003635/casey-mcquiston-romance-novels-literature/) Romance novels can help boost [responsive desire](https://www.wellandgood.com/how-to-get-turned-on/), which is when our minds get turned on and then create sexual arousal in our bodies. This differs from spontaneous desire, which occurs when we randomly feel the desire for sex in our bodies first. Romance novels help people get into a mindset that is conducive to engaging in sex, either solo or with a partner through their imaginations. That’s why reading or listening to a tale of a young woman being romantically torn between the steadfast love of a werewolf and the achingly dangerous seduction of a vampire, could be just the thing to ignite your sex life (I’m looking at you, [_Twilight_](https://time.com/6996662/twilight/)). You are transported out of the predictable patterns of everyday life and into a story whose sole purpose is to bring two (or more) characters together through love, longing, lust, and desire. It switches on a part of us that often gets dulled by having to compartmentalize our love lives in favor of more pressing matters. More importantly, romance novels allow our brains to exist in worlds that are hopelessly romantic, erotic, and safe to explore. That headspace creates the perfect conditions for sexual interest, especially when you find novels that speak to who you are and the themes you find stimulating. Over time, I’ve compiled a list of romance novels and short stories to share with my clients who need something to help their responsive desire. Many of them mention that porn is of no interest to them because they can get turned off by what they see, or the actions depicted just don’t arouse them. We discuss what they fantasize about or what has turned them on in the past. Having this knowledge is a great jumping off point for knowing what will instigate responsive desire. Whether it’s themes of forbidden love or interplanetary star-crossed lovers, knowing what specifically fuels your interest in sexual connection can help you select romance novels you’ll love and avoid ones that don’t meet your needs. Desires are incredibly complex and the amount of [subgenres within the romance ](https://books.org/blog/romance-subgenres/)genre reflect this. There’s everything from classic romance and romantic comedy to dark romance and paranormal romance. There are now more romance novels centering people of color, LGBTQIA+ people, and people with disabilities. And the tropes include everything from “meet cutes” and “love triangles” to “enemies to lovers,” all universal themes that gain specificity from the perspective of their authors. This wide range of subject matter and relationship dynamics benefits from the recent attempts to diversify the books landscape, as well as the [publishing industry](https://pen.org/report/race-equity-and-book-publishing/). With more diverse voices come more diverse love stories. This is so important for readers who have historically been left out of romance novels. Reading about characters who have the same cultural practices or who resemble you, further intensifies how much you identify with the characters and all of the emotions they express on their quest for love. Books like _You Made a Fool of Death With Your Beauty_ by [Akwaeke Emezi](http://Akwaeke Emezi), which features a Black female protagonist who is widowed and finds herself in a queer relationship, show the complexities of identity and romance and open the door for new romance readers to reap the sexual sparks they ignite. **_Read more:_** [_The 50 Best Romance Novels to Read Right Now_](https://time.com/collection/best-romance-books/) Romance novels are a place to both escape reality and dive deep into something so real we can feel it in our bodies. Stories of love and longing are universal, but how they are felt depends on how that love is constructed by the author. When we read romance novels that speak directly to who we are, or who we want to be, it allows us to become the characters and live through their stories. It also helps us know ourselves more by highlighting aspects of love that are particularly important to us. The state of romance novels today is such that anyone can find something that resonates with who they are and how they want to explore themes of love, sex, desire and belonging. These books are valuable resources for anyone who has struggled to understand how to tap into their sexual curiosity, or who needs a break from the rigors of day-to-day life (or dating!) to enjoy stories of romantic entanglements. There’s so much more to the genre than bodice-ripping, though that’s a steamy part of it. The stories may take place hundreds of years ago or thousands of years in the future. But the feelings are timeless. ## Transcript The book that got me into romance is something that I found in my fourth grade teachers little closet library. So thank you, miss Fescin. The book is called and of the Wild Rose in. Yes, I still have a copy. And it was a middle grade romance. A young adult romance. And it is set during the Revolutionary War. The heroines family owns an inn, and, you know, there's intrigue and drama from the redcoats and the Patriots. And although I Love Romance stories. This is the first actual I guess book that was a full genre romance format that I loved. And yeah, this is what really made me want to write romance. The book that got me into romance was Lisa Clay passes the wallflower series. I know I was supposed to pick just one book, but I can't. That whole series made me fall in love with romance. Growing up, all I really cared about when I was watching a movie or reading a book or even listening to stories about real life people was the romantic plot, the romantic subplot. That was all that fed me. So when I found books that basically, the entire thing was about the romance, I just realized I had found my home. The book that got me into reading romance was hidden Fires by Sandra Brown. I found it in my grandmother's luggage at a family reunion, and I couldn't put it down. There was something about it that just spoke to me so deeply. The book that got me into romance was ful tilts, which is, I think, Shane Ivanovich book that came out in 2003 ish. I was 12 at the time, and I snuck it out of my sister's room, and I hid behind my desk in my room, and I read it in, like, one afternoon. And that was the first romance I ever read. And I don't think I ever really looked back. S ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"OpinionNewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/7006518/romance-novels-sexual-benefits-essay/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/7006518/romance-novels-sexual-benefits-essay/"},"headline":"Embrace Your Love for Romance Novels. 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