It’s overnight date time on The Bachelorette, and the best place to fulfill those Fantasy Suite dreams is in Thailand. Becca has flown half-way around the world to find a soul mate. As she stood on the balcony of her hotel room and stared off into the middle distance, she explained that she was in love with two men and falling in love with a third. She was confident that she was close to finding a husband and just needed to break two more hearts before she could level up.
The best way to determine which man would earn the unique privilege of slipping yet another Neil Lane diamond on her finger was to take Blake, Garrett, and * does quick Google search * Jason to Thailand — and possibly to the Fantasy Suite.
Here’s what happened this week on The Bachelorette:
Thais That Bind
Becca met Blake in Chiang Mai, and because absence makes the heart grow fonder, she promptly took him to a hilltop monastery where it is forbidden to kiss or even touch on the grounds. They ogled each other, while hiking through the woods to a temple where they were greeted by a Buddhist monk. Becca said it felt very “old and cultural” to be speaking to a monk and was glad she got to share the experience with Blake. Speaking of sharing experiences, Blake had some doubts about sharing his girlfriend with two other guys. He admitted that he needed to know if Becca was hugging and kissing and loving on the other guys as much as she was hugging and kissing and loving on him.
Later that night, Blake told her his fears and more or less recited Oasis lyrics at her (“I don’t believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now”) while she tried to assuage his concerns by saying she gets it and he should just stay strong. Blake said he was the type of guy who “looks for a reason to stay, not a reason to go.” That melted Becca’s heart and she handed him the Fantasy Suite card. He said, “heck yeah” and the camera followed them to the room. Cut to the next morning, a shot of Becca’s dress on the floor, and Becca and Blake in bed talking about last night. She eventually ushered him out of the suite without even giving him time to put a shirt on. No time for that, because she had another date.
Becca claimed she always had such a good time with Jason, including when they were eating crickets at the market. Becca walked out of the temple, made a passing comment about living in Seattle, and then seemed to have a panic attack — or perhaps a delayed reaction to eating a cricket? As she started to hyperventilate, the producer pulled her aside for a sit-down in the shade. Becca admitted that she couldn’t really see a future with Jason. Even though she didn’t love Jason, Becca decided she owed it to him to continue the date. They made pleasant chit-chat as Jason attempted to be open and honest and vulnerable. Becca tried to dump him, but started hyperventilating instead. She excused herself and, while it could have been the cricket judging by how she grabbed her stomach while dashing off, it turned out that she just didn’t love Jason the way she loved Blake and Garrett. She was upset about wasting a perfectly good guy when there are so few in the world. She let him down easy — or as easy as possible when you’re telling a guy that you like your two other boyfriends more than you like him. After loading him into the car, Becca cried over her decision. After all, why get rid of the guy you say is the best kisser before Fantasy Suites?
Thai Me A River
The producers may have planned a romantic water rafting date for Becca and Garrett, but if so there’s an intern somewhere who’s about to be fired; turns out it was a Thai national holiday and the river was packed with locals on their day off. Instead of a private journey down the river, they were surrounded by elephants and villagers on rafts, pointing, laughing and splashing at the couple. While they didn’t get to canoodle as much as they may have wanted, Garrett appreciated their “teamwork” and the chance to “overcome obstacles” together.
Later that night they sat on blankets surrounded by mosquito repelling candles and Becca let Garrett talk about how much he liked, wait, loved her. And he claimed that by the way she kissed him, she loved him, too. She handed him the Fantasy Suite card and they head to a tree house, with Becca tottering along in heels through the jungle. They woke up in their tree fort talking about how they liked waking up next to each other, ignoring the camera and the camera operator in the room with them.
Give It a Thai
In a repeat of Arie’s season when Becca’s ex popped up to ruin her post-Fantasy Suite buzz, as soon as she was back in the city, there came a knock on Becca’s hotel room door. It was Jason, who either couldn’t get a flight out of Thailand or just wanted to get some closure before heading back to Buffalo. He handed her a scrapbook that he put together through his tears. Even more impressive for a reality show contestant, Jason calmly listened to her explanation, accepted her feelings as valid, didn’t get aggressive or angry, and wished her the best on her journey. He left her with a firm hug and a heart-felt good luck, all of which put him in the running to be the next Bachelor. I mean, who doesn’t want a Bachelor who scrap-books?
Thai the Knot
Chris Harrison was flown all the way to Thailand just to make it seem as though he was one of Becca’s trusted advisors. He listened to her as she explained that she sent Jason away and then pointed in the direction of her two remaining suitors. She handed Garrett one rose, and Blake the other, and you could practically see the thought bubble forming over Blake’s head as he tried to figure out what it meant that he got the second rose.
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