--- title: Sleep: Your Partner Could Be Making Your Insomnia Worse description: A new study finds that the majority of bed partners encouraged behavior that could exacerbate their partner's sleeping woes. canonical: https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/ author: Real Simple article:opinion: false article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2017-06-14T12:56:22.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:54:15.433Z article:section: Health og:title: Your Significant Other Could Be Making Your Sleep Worse og:description: A new study finds that people often exacerbate their bed partner's imsomnia og:url: https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltef07f16ca448c81b/6988d16e196cf44251040925/couple-sleeping-bed.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 5144 og:image:height: 2894 og:image:alt: Couple napping on sofa og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Your Significant Other Could Be Making Your Sleep Worse twitter:description: A new study finds that people often exacerbate their bed partner's imsomnia twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltef07f16ca448c81b/6988d16e196cf44251040925/couple-sleeping-bed.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # Your Significant Other Could Be Making Your Sleep Worse > Sponsored content. 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There is no cost and no subscription requirement. ## Video: Why Sleeping In May Be Dangerous [Watch (HLS stream): Why Sleeping In May Be Dangerous](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/bQ3Ors7A.m3u8) (1:30)  _Published 2017-06-12. ocial jet lag—the term for what happens to your body when you stay up late and sleep in on the weekends—may contribute to poor health, worse mood, and fatigue_ by [Amanda MacMillan / Real Simple](https://time.com/author/real-simple/) ## Amanda MacMillan / Real Simple Jun 14, 2017 12:56 PM UTC  Getty Images by [Amanda MacMillan / Real Simple](https://time.com/author/real-simple/) ## Amanda MacMillan / Real Simple Jun 14, 2017 12:56 PM UTC Having trouble sleeping? If your significant other has tried to help, take their advice with a grain of salt: In a new study from Australian researchers, the majority of bed partners encouraged behaviors that could actually [make insomnia worse](http://www.aasmnet.org/articles.aspx?id=6923). Insomnia is largely seen as an individual condition, the authors wrote in the study’s abstract, even though about 60 percent of adults sleep with a partner. To examine the relationship between insomniacs and their bedmates, they gave questionnaires to 14 women and 17 men whose partners were participating in a separate clinical trial for insomnia. They found that even though these partners didn’t have sleep issues of their own, they often made accommodations for their loved one’s insomnia, such as modifying their own sleep schedules, work schedules, or leisure activities. **_RELATED:_** [**_This Sound Machine Changed the Way I Sleep_**](https://www.realsimple.com/health/preventative-health/sleep/sound-machine/?xid=time-rs) When people said they tried to be helpful with regards to their loved ones’ sleep problems, they were certainly appreciated for it; their partners reported their relationships to be more satisfying than those whose partners didn’t offer assistance. But it did take a toll: Partners who did attempt to help reported more anxiety than those who didn’t. What’s more, the “help” they offered wasn’t necessarily good advice. A whopping 74 percent of partners encouraged early bedtimes or late wake times, even though sleep experts recommend against this type of behavior for people with insomnia. Other common suggestions included reading or watching TV in bed, taking naps, using caffeine, taking it easy during the day, and taking sleeping pills or alcohol before bed. These things go against sleep-hygiene guidelines and the practices laid out in [cognitive behavioral therapy](https://www.realsimple.com/health/preventative-health/sleep/how-to-cure-insomnia) (CBT), the top-line treatment recommended for people with chronic insomnia. During CBT sessions, people learn to not get into bed until they feel sleepy, to get up at the same time every day, to use their bed for sleep and sex only, and to avoid napping, especially close to bedtime. Exercise during the day is generally encouraged to help promote shuteye at night, while alcohol (which can disrupt deep-wave restorative sleep) is not. “Despite what are likely good intentions, bed partners may contribute to the [perpetuation of insomnia](http://www.sleepmeeting.org/docs/default-source/attendee-documents/abstractbook2017.pdf?sfvrsn=2),” the authors wrote in the study’s abstract. At the same time, they add, those people may also be experiencing anxiety related to their loved one’s sleep issues. Lead author Alix Mellor, PhD, postdoctoral research fellow at Monash University, says more research is needed on insomnia treatments that can benefit patients themselves as well as their other halves. Treatment programs should involve both partners in a relationship, he adds, and proactively address how one partner’s behaviors could be helping—or harming—the other’s sleep. _This_ [_article_](https://www.realsimple.com/health/preventative-health/sleep/your-bed-partner-could-make-insomnia-worse/?xid=time-rs) _originally appeared on_ [_RealSimple.com_](https://www.realsimple.com/?xid=time-rs) ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/"},"headline":"Your Significant Other Could Be Making Your Sleep Worse","datePublished":"2017-06-14T12:56:22.000Z","dateModified":"2026-08-04T07:54:15.433Z","description":"A new study finds that the majority of bed partners encouraged behavior that could exacerbate their partner's sleeping woes.","url":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/","keywords":["Sleep","health","onetime"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltef07f16ca448c81b/6988d16e196cf44251040925/couple-sleeping-bed.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Amanda MacMillan / Real Simple"}],"articleSection":"Health","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltef07f16ca448c81b/6988d16e196cf44251040925/couple-sleeping-bed.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"Couple napping on sofa","caption":"","creditText":"Getty Images","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/section/health/","name":"Health"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"/tag/sleep/","name":"Sleep"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/","name":"Your Significant Other Could Be Making Your Sleep Worse"}}]},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"VideoObject","name":"Why Sleeping In May Be Dangerous","description":"ocial jet lag—the term for what happens to your body when you stay up late and sleep in on the weekends—may contribute to poor health, worse mood, and fatigue","thumbnailUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/v2/media/bQ3Ors7A/poster.jpg?width=720","uploadDate":"2017-06-12T17:44:59.000Z","contentUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/bQ3Ors7A.m3u8","embedUrl":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/","duration":"PT1M30S","potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","target":"https://time.com/4816186/significant-other-sleep-insomnia/?jw_start={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"}}] ```