My mother asked what my husband does all day. Like, how much housework could there possibly be that warrants him not being in full-time employment while our child is in daycare?
A friend talked about having house-envy and suggested that everyone feels envious about houses that other people live in (and suggested that I feel that envy too. Well, no…)
I said “participate in an investor bootcamp”, rather than “speaking at an investor bootcamp” in a radio interview, making it sound like I was receiving investor education, instead of positioning myself as an expert speaker.
I missed picking up one of my child’s small toys while we were travelling and for a week she kept asking where the cat was. I had to tell her that the cat stayed behind in Seattle.
Each of these incidences niggle me. They are examples of people unintentionally negging or small mistakes that I’ve made. The niggles follow me around demanding more attention that they are worth in an attempt to become bigger and bigger issues that they actually are. I find that big issues are sometimes easier to deal with. It’s the little things that grate on me and squawk in my mind’s ear. So I actively deal with them.
1. Shake it off. Literally. Shake your arms or brush the niggle off as if you are physically removing something from your body. The physical action and shift in energy can help shift your attention.
2. Cold turkey. I used to worry a lot. I read lots of books to try to deal with the worry and I then I figured out that the only way to stop worrying is to stop worrying. Cold turkey. Nothing fancy. Just stop thinking about the thing that is bugging you.
3. Meditation. This helps make cold turkey easier to do. Practice quieting your mind. In meditation, thoughts may enter your mind, but you practice noticing the thoughts and then letting them go.
4. Focus on the positive. Focus on things that are good and counter-arguments to the things that you feel have gone wrong.
5. Smile. Or laugh and you’ll start to feel better and then be in a better position to deal with whatever is troubling you.
6. Take action. Calmly work through the problem and try to resolve it, knowing that it’s not the end of the world.
7. Talk it out. Talk to someone about it, get a different perspective on it, or ask for help.
Best of luck and I hope your day ends on a bright note.
This question originally appeared on Quora: How do I learn to stay positive when things go wrong? Even if something tiny goes wrong my whole day is ruined. What do I do?
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