Samantha Bee was not happy with Sunday night’s presidential debate. Calling it “Debate 2: The Night We Gave Up,” Bee wasted no time on Monday’s Full Frontal in dissecting the horrors of the debate.
“And so America, already heartbroken and spattered with sleaze, dragged itself to the second debate between a well-prepared if uninspiring public servant and a crotch-fondling slab of rancid meatloaf,” Bee said. “Moderators Anderson Cooper and Martha Raddatz gamely carried on as if this whole evening weren’t completely insane, because as we all know, presidential debates typically feature one candidate threatening to jail his opponent, then stalking her around the stage like he’s Leatherface, and finally fornicating with a chair.”
Bee added: “When you’re a star, the chairs let you do it! Instead of the dynamic lunatic Trump we got in the first debate, we got the Fat Elvis version: sluggish, bloated, and judging by his answers, possibly medicated.”
The big issue hanging over the entire debate, of course, was the recently-released tape of Trump and Billy Bush making graphic comments about women and their bodies. During the debate, Trump tried to brush off these remarks as “locker room talk,” but Bee was having none of that excuse.
“Oh, that thing I still have nightmares about was just locker room talk and not sexual assault? Woo! Goodbye, PTSD!” Bee said. “Also, you weren’t in a locker room, you sleazy pair of sweat socks — you were at work!”
Watch the clip above.