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title: Dawn Porter: The Racial Politics of Abortion
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og:title: The Racial Politics of Abortion
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# The Racial Politics of Abortion

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<!-- video src="https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/gUTa6KyP.m3u8" -->
## Video: True Stories, Hard Choices: Part 2

[Watch (HLS stream): True Stories, Hard Choices: Part 2](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/gUTa6KyP.m3u8) (13:48)

![True Stories, Hard Choices: Part 2](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/v2/media/gUTa6KyP/poster.jpg?width=720)

_Published 2016-09-28. Filmmaker Dawn Porter looks at the racial politics of abortion in America today._


by 

[Dawn Porter / Essence](https://time.com/author/essence/)


## Dawn Porter / Essence


Contributor

Sep 29, 2016 1:00 PM UTC

by 

[Dawn Porter / Essence](https://time.com/author/essence/)


## Dawn Porter / Essence


Contributor

Sep 29, 2016 1:00 PM UTC

_In partnership with ESSENCE and TIME, acclaimed filmmaker Dawn Porter (_Gideon’s Army, Trapped) _reports on the often-overlooked Black women who seek out reproductive services in America. This two-part docu-series gives a snapshot into the lives of Black healthcare providers, mothers and pro-choice and pro-life activists and shows how laws that restrict abortion access impact Black women and their families._

_Below, Porter writes about her inspiration for the film._

When ESSENCE and TIME asked me to make this short two-part film about the racial politics of abortion, I discovered that I have a very personal connection to the subject. Despite the fact that I had already made a documentary called _Trapped_ about abortion, I didn’t fully understand how it had affected my own family history, how it had even triggered an incident with the KKK and one of my relatives.

Making a film about abortion can unsettle you for many reasons. Hearing women tell you they would love to have another child if only they could feed the ones they already have will break your heart. I heard these stories over and over while making my documentary, and I know every woman I met faced tremendous internal conflict over choosing to terminate a pregnancy. But this choice might be even more complicated for Black women.

Race still plays a role in abortion politics. At abortion clinics across the South, White protestors hold pictures of Black babies as they shout at women entering the clinics. And it’s not just White protesters. Even though polls show that most African-Americans describe themselves as pro-choice, there are scores of Black anti-abortion activists who also use race in their anti-choice rhetoric. The truth is, most women who [receive abortions are White](https://www.guttmacher.org/about/gpr/2008/08/abortion-and-women-color-bigger-picture), but Black women [are five times more likely](https://www.guttmacher.org/about/gpr/2008/08/abortion-and-women-color-bigger-picture) than White women to get an abortion. But this statistic doesn’t tell the full story. It doesn’t tell you that the overwhelming reason the women I met gave for having an abortion was that they simply could not afford another child. And it doesn’t tell you the heartache behind these decisions.


Often our stories, the stories of Black women, are too often lost or overlooked, but I hope this film will give new voice to the hard choices that so many women face.

_Dawn Porter is an award-winning filmmaker whose 2013 documentary GIDEON’S ARMY won the Sundance Film Festival Editing Award and the Tribeca All Access Creative Promise Award, along with an Emmy nomination. Her 2016 film, “TRAPPED,” which centers on abortion rights in America, won the Special Jury Award for Social Impact Filmmaking at the Sundance Film Festival._

_This_ [_article_](http://www.essence.com/culture/black-women-abortion-dawn-porter) _originally appeared on_ [_Essence.com_](http://www.essence.com)


## Transcript

Hey, before you leave come and talk to me just for a second. My name is Tonya, I'm a registered nurse. Used to do Momma- baby nursing. I can tell you how abortion is gonna hurt you. You'll never be the same again. [ MUSIC ] When I started filming Trapped, my film about the struggles of abortion providers in the south I never thought I'd meet a protestor like Tanya. [ BLANK_AUDIO ] In the black community most people describe themselves as religious. And even if they don't personally support abortion, they also describe themselves as pro- choice. [ MUSIC ] I'm the media spokesperson for Pro- Life Mississippi.

The pro- life side has won, we've already won. How did you get involved with Pro- Life Mississippi? I had gone to Saturday morning mass. And someone came up to me and said, would you like to go and pray at the abortion clinic with us? I said, sure! And I went out to the clinic and I saw a picture of an aborted baby, and I fell on my knees and I wept. I couldn't I could not believe it. I had an abortion when I was coming along and it was at that time that I realized what I had done. I weep for women who are gonna go down the same road that I go down And I know how painful it is. At the time what made you think that you couldn't.

Fear. What were you afraid of? Everything. You name it I was scared. Were you married? No. If I had been married I wouldn't have been afraid of anybody finding out about my fornication. Which is a large part of why women have abortions. Can't let anybody know I was doing that. Ooh, can't let anybody know I'm pregnant and I'm not married. Ooh, can't let, just fear, just fear. And trying to keep the secret. Give me [ UNKNOWN ] before you leave, let me give you some [ CROSSTALK ] You cannot be on the streets like that. I can't, I can't even do this? You guys on the air, ma'am? You need to get up off the ground.

Who's ready for motherhood? Who's ready? No one's ready. But you accept, you accept. And we're talking about money and a baby sitter. My dad was a family medicine doctor, then I have several cousins who are physicians. The black community is lukewarm. I've got people in my family that got so angry with me. When I started doing pro- life work, they're sitting on the fence. With the bush there is no middle brown. Be hunger or be cold, but if you look warm, God will literally vomit you out of this mouth. You know make up your mind. Choose good or choose evil. There's so much about Tanya that's really fascinated to me.

She has family members who are pro choice, family members who are physicians, just like I do. But when I think about how she told me, It's just about money and a baby sitter, I get really upset. According to the Guttmacher institute 59 % of American women who have abortions are already mothers. They know how hard the job is. [ MUSIC ] It took me 10 hours to get to this clinic. My area in Mississippi it didn't have a clinic for abortion, so I had to my hometown where I'm from. To see if they would do it for me, but they told me I was too far along. A lot of people are stopping at 9 weeks and 12 weeks, and I'm 17.

Right now, I'm kinda relying on government assistance until I find a job. So I just don't have the money for the abortion. That applied to me so long. 460. I paid 600 total. I just had a birthday, so I took some of the birthday money that I had. And it was also a fear. My mom, she doesn't believe in abortion. I need you to sign here. I have a six month old baby I'm sorry. There's just a lot that goes with taking care of one child, let alone two. I thought, I can't, I can't do it. I can't do it again, not by myself. Like my child's father, he's not involved as he should be. Yeah. [ INAUDIBLE ] Before I came, I was kinda scared.

I hope it's not a sketchy clinic, but Everybody is so nice, the place is clean. Hi, how are you doing? Cramp a little bit Okay, you cramp a little bit? What are we gonna do is give you some medicine and have you put in on your cheeks. Just put it in your cheeks, don't swallow it. Let it dissolve. Yep, just put it in your cheek. Well, I wasn't really planning on staying as long as I did When I came in Tuesday I thought that I was gonna be gone by Thursday, which was yesterday, but it didn't happen like that. [ MUSIC ] When I came in it was a lot of girls in here, so I guess he tried to schedule them first come first serve.

And I had to wait until today to get the procedure done. Breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth. Deep breaths. Your cervix is dilated the way I need it to be. So this is where you start to feel something pulling. Ms. Gloria, the operator of this clinic. I'm happy that she fought keep it open. A lot of young ladies like me don't have a second chance, even look to other places to get this done, so I'm kind of happy about that. Yeah, I made it. [ LAUGH ] My [ UNKNOWN ] with my kid Thinking about. Tell me what him to be when he grows up. What do you want for his life? I'm sorry but I'm about to start crying but, [ BLANK_AUDIO ] [ SOUND ] I just want him to be better than me.

[ SOUND ] I kinda went through a lot growing up or whatever. As far as my parents. I just want him to be better than me. I ran. I was in the streets a lot. I've actually kinda sorta just got out the streets like a few years ago. And I just want him to be better than me .

>> I'm a big believer in God and Jesus Christ. And [ MUSIC ] Only God can judge you. He knows where you heart is, so just do what you need to do. [ INAUDIBLE ] in the day, God, in our hearts, minds, know God that will separate us from you God, but we repent of it God, right now God. If I was [ UNKNOWN ] I ask you God to restore us God and to ride standard God with you God. [ INAUDIBLE ] I live in Montgomery. Not only do I work at my home church that I grew up in, I still live in the same house I grew up in. There's nothing like home and I think the greatest thing is to be able to be home. You still in high school?

You ever finish high school? When I introduce myself to the women I tell them that I am otherwise they say I ain't here to study you know. And I'm not here to force anything on anybody And I feel that my role here is not to judge anybody, but to let them know that hey, God forgives you. We have all sinned and come short of the glory of God. But God is a forgiving God. For whatever reason, you feel this is the best decision for you. So you got to be able to- I prayed, I prayed. God forgives us but the thing is sometimes we can't forgive ourself. So you got to forgive yourself or you got to find peace anytime of the storm.

Okay? My experience and my relationship with Christ makes a big difference in the recovery room because Women are having a hard time. And I have the opportunity to administer to them and stuff. They appreciate that. Good morning, Reproductive Health Services, how may I help you? Callie, here you go, baby. All right, we'll find it. All right. God gave us choice. No one have the right to take that choice from anyone, I feel. You don't have to agree with it, that person's deal to have that choice that make your own decisions. The protestors say that I'm wrong, that but just because you closed the clinic, that's not gonna change the fact that women are gonna still have abortions.

And I think you need to be more concerned that they're gonna have it on the safe place Will they gonna get the treatment that they need and the care that they need versus on a back alley, in a dark room. That's the one they don't really know what they doing. [ SOUND ] Let him who's without sin cast the first stone. [ MUSIC ] None of us know what tomorrow holds. So if you wake up in the morning and you don't have that bank account like you have now and something would happen to one of your kids. What would you want? How would you feel? You ready? If you have never lived it, then you need to think about [ UNKNOWN ].

What can I do to help someone else? And making it hard is not helping. [ MUSIC ] Working on this film, I realized I actually had no idea what my mother thought about abortion. Like most kids you think you know everything. But I realized I had never asked her. Okay, don't say anything I know I never told you. So I'm gonna say, when I was around, 40? We're talking thirty years go. You must have just started college. And I discovered that I was pregnant. I mean to the doctor I think I was about somewhere between four and six weeks How. I never knew that. There's a lot of stuff you don't know but I'm telling you now was a very part time for us economically.

I had four children who were late teenagers. We had unbelievable financial troubles. At that time we didn't know if we were gonna be able to make the house payment the next week and it just seemed like just too overwhelming. And we made a decision to have an abortion. It was really a hard decision .

>> And what I was thinking is, my father died. My step- father, he married when I was a teenager. He had two children. So we had this splendid family. And all of us always wished we had, I don't know why, we always wanted you to have a baby. Did you know that? No, But don't tell me that now. Still to this day, when I look at all of you I think in terms of what this child would have been to you at this age. LIke this child would be 30 now. I look at my grandchildren and I will tell you it's something that never has gone away. It's funny that all the talks about abortion, I don't really think about my abortion.

But what makes me think about my abortion are my children and my grandchildren and I just will probably never get over it. Are you religious? I am very religious. How do you reconcile faith and your choice? I believe that God is forgiving. I think that people use God to justify whatever they want it to justify, but I don't think that God or Jesus really would chastise anyone. I think that God and Jesus will be pro- choice. Me too. [ MUSIC ]

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