--- description: Reviewing Flora Fraser’s new book The Washingtons title: In 'The Washingtons,' Marriage Tips From the First First Couple image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltde093bcdab65f2d0/6988d9b9bc6cfc69913e2a3c/time-logo.jpg?branch=production --- * [Entertainment](/section/entertainment/) ## Entertainment Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close # Marriage Tips from the First First Couple  by [Lily Rothman](/author/lily-rothman/)  ## Lily Rothman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Rothman is managing editor at TIME. Nov 12, 2015 2:37 PM CUT  by [Lily Rothman](/author/lily-rothman/)  ## Lily Rothman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Rothman is managing editor at TIME. Nov 12, 2015 2:37 PM CUT It’s a self-evident truth that George Washington set precedents. In her new book The Washingtons, a biography of America’s founding marriage, Flora Fraser makes the less evident point that Martha Washington set some too and that together they paved the way for First Couples to follow. The Washingtons can be a model for the rest of us too. George and Martha had a full partnership and a functional blended family, in which George fully embraced his stepchildren as his own. Privately and publicly, according to Fraser’s account, they weren’t stingy with affection. Martha, predating Joni Mitchell by about 200 years, called George her “Old Man”; his comrade-in-arms Henry Lee III once noted that George, in turn, was “exemplarily tender” to Martha. They also knew that marriage takes work. It’s pointless to “look for perfect felicity before you consent to wed,” George would write to a granddaughter in 1794–but whether or not he sought it, he and Martha are proof that you can get pretty close. –LILY ROTHMAN ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/4109874/marriage-tips-from-the-first-first-couple/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/4109874/marriage-tips-from-the-first-first-couple/"},"headline":"Marriage Tips from the First First Couple","datePublished":"2015-11-12T14:37:43.000Z","dateModified":"2026-02-22T12:33:23.575Z","description":"Reviewing Flora Fraser’s new book The Washingtons","url":"https://time.com/4109874/marriage-tips-from-the-first-first-couple/","keywords":["Books"],"thumbnailUrl":"","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Lily Rothman","jobTitle":"Rothman is managing editor at TIME.","url":"https://time.com/author/lily-rothman/"}],"articleSection":"Entertainment","image":[],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/section/entertainment/","name":"Entertainment"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/4109874/marriage-tips-from-the-first-first-couple/","name":"Marriage Tips from the First First Couple"}}]}] ```