September 8, 2015 10:11 AM EDT

Even though John Oliver’s Last Week Tonight is still on summer hiatus, the comedian took time from his vacation to make a handy video guide for kids headed back to school.

Oliver sums up which lessons you can ignore—you really never use math beyond arithmetic as an adult—and which ones your teachers will screw up—those European explorers are actually genocidal maniacs. He ends with a list of who dies at the end of some syllabus staples like Romeo and Juliet, The Great Gatsby and Of Mice and Men.

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Write to Eliana Dockterman at eliana.dockterman@time.com.

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