Out in the ‘Hood: Young, Gay and Hoping for Something Better

5 minute read

Pulitzer Prize-winning photographer Preston Gannaway began documenting the life of Tavaris “Teddy Ebony” Edwards when they met during Pride week at Norfolk State University last year. Teddy is young gay man living in Chesapeake, Virginia, who came out at 16 years old and dropped out of school. Today he’s attending college part-time and hoping to better his life. The following piece is by Edwards, along with excerpts from interviews by Gannaway.

My name is Tavaris “Teddy Ebony” Edwards and I’m a gay black man. I’m a 23-year-old college student at Norfolk State University and Tidewater Community College .

I’m in the Spartan Legion Marching Band at Norfolk State as a Spartan Guard and I’m also involved in the LGBT organization “Legasi” at Norfolk State.

I grew up in the hood. When you’re staying in a rough neighborhood, you always gotta keep your guard up.

I’m the first openly gay person in my family. As a young boy, I was always feminine. I always liked boys. I had to hide it, because people expected me to be who I wasn’t. Before I came out, I was the captain of the football team. I was living a dream that everybody wanted me to live. I came out when I was sixteen. I guess I got tired of hiding who I really wanted to be.

School was always tough on me. I was always teased about being gay. I didn’t wanna be around that. So I just left. [In my family] nobody’s got their high school diploma. But me and my mom got our GEDs.

My mom was both my parents. … My dad died when I was two years old and my stepfather was sent to prison when I was seven so my mom did her best at raising me. Growing up gay and without a father was very hard for me. Because there’s nothing like the support of your dad.

When I turned 16 I accepted myself as being gay. It was very hard because I didn’t know if I would be accepted by my family, how friends would feel. But I couldn’t keep hiding who I was anymore. It was becoming too stressful. When people called me names like gay or faggie, I used to be so sad. Because I was more than just gay or a faggie. It really bothered me, though, because before I came out I was cool with everyone. I had gay tendencies but I was a funny, so I always had everyone laughing. … But the hardest thing about coming out was telling my mom. I knew it was gonna crush her. But she took it better than I thought. She still loved me as her son. So once I had her approval, being gay became easier because I didn’t care what others thought anymore. My mom knew, and that’s all that mattered.

I believe in God. I go to church. God had been blessing me so much. I want a baby. I may be gay, but I want a baby. I plan to get married one day. Hopefully I can get married to a man.

Being gay, that’s the easy part. I’m happy being gay. You have no choice but to accept being gay, baby, because if you stress about it, you’re gonna hurt yourself.

I’ve been in the ballroom scene for almost six years now and I can honestly say the ballroom scene made me who I am today. Six years ago I was a 17-year-old high school drop-out, always fighting, doing things I wasn’t supposed to be doing, trying to fit in and be somebody I wasn’t. As the years went past and I started to get older I realized there is so much out there in life. Like school, dancing, traveling, marching band. I started off by getting my GED in 2012 and joining my church, Enoch Baptist church, where I’m accepted for who I am.

One thing I can say [is that] over the years, being gay has changed completely. It’s more accepted and respected by some. Nowadays I see gays wear short shorts, girl shirts, tights, girl shoes and they walk around comfortable. Back in ’06, ’07, you would have been jumped or joked. Yes, that’s still around, but I don’t see to much of it anymore. I think that within the next five years being gay will be even more accepted. And I can’t wait to see it!

It’s gotten so much better over the years. It’s comfortable now. I walk through the hood like it’s nothing. Everybody knows me now. This is me. I’m gay and I accept that.


Preston Gannaway is a photographer based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her documentary story on the St. Pierre family, Remember Me, was awarded the 2008 Pulitzer Prize for feature photography.


Tavaris "Teddy Ebony" Edwards plays with his pet Chihuahua Diego in his bedroom in Chesapeake, Va. "When I'm crying, he licks my tears." Teddy dropped out of high school when he was 16. "School was always tough on me. I was always teased about being gay," he said. "I didn't wanna be around that. So I just left."Preston Gannaway
Teddy shaves at home in Chesapeake, Va. He usually cuts his own hair every Friday and often talks about becoming a professional barber. Preston Gannaway
One of his favorite things to do is twirl his flag outside his family's apartment in public housing. "It's not the best, but it's not the worst," he says of where they live. "I want to get away from the hood, I want to know something else. When you're staying in a rough neighborhood, you always gotta keep your guard up. I'm ready to let my guard down." Preston Gannaway
Teddy helps watch out for the Hot Ice dancers as part of the Spartan Guard during the season's first football game at Norfolk State University on Saturday, September 1, 2012. Since childhood, Teddy has loved Norfolk State’s marching band. Around the time he came out as gay, he began hanging out on the NSU campus. He met a couple guys who were gay and members of the Spartan Guard. He thought then, “I want to be where they're at." Preston Gannaway
Teddy and his best friend Jamesie Johnson take self-portraits for Facebook in Jamesie's bathroom. Preston Gannaway
Teddy vogues on the dance floor after being named godfather (a prestigious leadership role) in the Virginia chapter of the Ebony house in June. Though Teddy's real family was pretty supportive when he came out, his friends in the ballroom scene were instrumental during that time. "They was my family,” he says of his friends. “That's how I found myself." Preston Gannaway
Teddy, who has spent years voguing in the ballroom scene, dances suggestively with a friend while practicing with his Ebony family before a gay ball. Members of the ballroom subculture are organized into "houses" and share the same last name as their gay family members. "Voguing is something I love doing," he said. "I love dancing. It's a part of dancing that a gay person understands." Preston Gannaway
Rick Ross Ebony hugs Teddy after a ball in Hampton in December.Preston Gannaway
At a candlelight vigil he organized for a friend who died, Teddy, third from left, comforts Anthony Winters. Punch Ebony, who died of cancer, was part of Teddy's ballroom family. The vigil was held in part because Punch's gay friends were afraid they wouldn't be welcome at the funeral. At left is Ja'Quan Harvey and Twiggy Garcon.Preston Gannaway
A friend films Teddy during a birthday party at his neighbor's apartment. Teddy's 22nd birthday was the same day President Obama made his historic announcement in support of same-sex marriage.Preston Gannaway
Teddy's cousin Bean Hall, who is also gay, yells up to a friend during a party. They are part of a vibrant black gay community that often goes unnoticed in a predominantly conservative area of Virginia. Preston Gannaway
Teddy hands his phone to his great grandma so she can talk to Teddy's mom, as he checks in on her between classes at Tidewater Community College. At left, a family friend looks on. Teddy's father was killed when Teddy was 2 years old. "My mama raised me on her own. She had me when she was 14. She did a good job. I made some bad decisions, but she did a good job." Preston Gannaway
Teddy stretches out on the floor while hanging out with some of his neighbors in Chesapeake, Va. His friend Jamesie teased him. "Girl, look at you laying down there like a rug." "I see myself being somebody, some day," Teddy said, "But I'm still looking. I'm still finding."Preston Gannaway
Teddy plays with his neighbor's son Keion Johnson. "I want a baby - I may be gay - but I want a baby." Though he knows by watching the young mothers around him that he's not ready yet. "Babies is a lot. Sometimes I watch my friends and I think I couldn't do that." Preston Gannaway
Teddy and his new boyfriend Chris Lowery spend time together outside Teddy's home in Chesapeake, Va., on Friday, June 14, 2013. Preston Gannaway

More Must-Reads From TIME

Contact us at letters@time.com