--- description: Photographer Ilona Szwarc's camera has brought her closer to her mother-in-law than she could ever imagine. LightBox presents Szwarc's on-going project in honor of Mother's Day. title: The Camera as a Bridge: A Daughter-in-Law’s Tale on Mother’s Day image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltc6742501e33a0ed8/6987a4ebe20a873022a87bc9/szwarc_ilona-12.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  * [World](/section/world/) ## World Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close * [LightBox](/tag/time-section-lightbox/) ## LightBox Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close # The Camera as a Bridge: A Daughter-in-Law's Tale on Mother's Day  by [Lily Rothman](/author/lily-rothman/)  ## Lily Rothman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Rothman is managing editor at TIME. May 10, 2013 8:00 AM CUT  The photographer's mother-in-law Anna Rainska waits for her laundry in the basement of her building in Rego Park, Queens. The photographer's mother-in-law Anna Rainska waits for her laundry in the basement of her building in Rego Park, Queens.Ilona Szwarc  by [Lily Rothman](/author/lily-rothman/)  ## Lily Rothman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Rothman is managing editor at TIME. May 10, 2013 8:00 AM CUT When Ilona Szwarc and her husband moved from Poland to New York in 2008, she had never met her mother-in-law, Anna, who had made the same move decades earlier. Other daughters-in-law might have endured awkward meals or family vacations until the relationship got comfortable, but Ilona Szwarc is a photographer and she took a different approach. Although it’s only been a few years between that beginning and this Mother’s Day, Szwarc and her mother-in-law now enjoy a warm relationship. And photography helped get them there. “We have a unique relationship where we connect through the camera and through the act of photographing,” says Szwarc. “This is a way for us to spend time together. It brings us close.” Perhaps even closer than other daughters-in-law are to their husband’s mothers. Szwarc’s pictures of Anna—whom she calls by her first name—capture a broad range of emotions. Despite their family connection, the photographer does not always present a rosy picture of Anna’s life; neither does Anna hide from the camera. Szwarc says Anna loves to be photographed and is courageously open. The pictures chronicle moments of joy, as well as instances of loneliness. That juxtaposition of fun and melancholy was manifest in the very first picture in the series: right after Szwarc suggested that they do a project together, Anna picked up a Venetian-style mask and held it in front of her face. “I think this very much reflects her personality,” says Szwarc. “She likes to laugh, though not all of the pictures show that; she’s a free spirit; she loves costume parties. But for me, as a photographer it brings another layer of significance, thinking about identity.” Thinking about the idea of masks—which show up several times throughout the series—was one of the ways in which the photographer grew closer to her subject. As immigrants, both Anna and Ilona have had to deal with the decision of whether, and to what degree, they want to blend in or distinguish themselves, to grapple with what it means to be a Polish woman in America. (Or a woman, period: like much of Szwarc’s other work, the Anna photographs also touch on a fascination with other sorts of masks, like beauty and appearance.) Immigration inevitably means that people become physically distant from one another. Although Anna left Poland partly to make a better future for her family, she was not able to arrange for her son—Szwarc’s husband—to join her until he was 19\. (He traveled back and forth between the U.S. and Poland several times between then and 2008.) Her husband, who appears in one of the photographs, does not live in the U.S.; she has not yet fully found her place in the community of her new homeland. The process of the family coming back together is still a work in progress, and Anna’s life is often, as Szwarc’s photographs show, a solitary one. The immigrant’s story especially stands out in the one photograph in the series that Szwarc did not take, a snapshot of Anna in front of the Statue of Liberty, taken by Szwarc’s husband Bartek Rainski shortly after his mother arrived in the United States. The composition is noteworthy—Anna’s figure and the statue’s seem to echo one another—as is its meaning for Szwarc. “It represents Anna’s journey to fulfill her dreams and hopes for a brighter future in this country,” Szwarc says. When it comes to Szwarc’s photographs, Anna is more concerned with the journey than with the destination. She wants to be photographed and to spend time with her daughter-in-law, but Szwarc gets the impression that when Anna sees the pictures of her own life, they seem so ordinary as to be uninteresting. Szwarc feels differently: though her period of intense work on the Anna series has finished, she says it’s an open-ended project and will continue to evolve. Just as their relationship has. “It’s gone from not knowing someone at all,” she says, “to knowing this person very intimately, in a sense, and witnessing this person’s ups and downs, witnessing her life.” --- [**_Ilona Szwarc_**](http://www.ilonaszwarc.com/ "undefined") _is a photographer based in New York City. Her work often examines gender, identity and beauty in context of American society._ **_Lily Rothman_** _is a writer-producer for TIME.com._ ---  The photographer's mother-in-law Anna Rainska waits for her laundry in the basement of her building in Rego Park, Queens. Ilona Szwarc  Anna spends time with her husband Jerzy, who has just returned home for a short period of time after being away for several months of work. Ilona Szwarc  Anna falls asleep after work. She is tired from taking apart her dried Chirstmas tree, which she keeps until March each year. Ilona Szwarc  Anna tries on her Venetian mask. Ilona Szwarc  A crucifix and duck decoration hang on the wall. Ilona Szwarc  Anna watches Fit TV. Ilona Szwarc  Anna plays with Toffee in her living room. Ilona Szwarc  Anna attends the costume party at St. Stanislaus church in the East Village of Manhattan. Ilona Szwarc  Anna waits for her favorite knish at the local Knish Nosh in Rego Park, Queens. Ilona Szwarc  Anna looks at herself in the bathroom mirror. Ilona Szwarc  A close up of Anna's eye as she holds a mirror. Ilona Szwarc  Anna gazes out the window after taking a shower. Ilona Szwarc  Anna often can't fall asleep easily due to irregular work hours. Ilona Szwarc  Anna relaxes in the early morning after coming back from a night shift. Ilona Szwarc  Anna enjoys a snack in her living room. Ilona Szwarc  Anna enjoys the first day of Spring at her favorite park. Ilona Szwarc  Anna takes a walk to her favorite antique store, just around the corner from her house. Ilona Szwarc  Anna sits among her new flowers. Ilona Szwarc for TIME  Anna hosts Thanksgiving dinner. Ilona Szwarc  A dessert plate and coffee cup on a table in Anna's living room. Ilona Szwarc  Anna applies makeup in her bedroom. Ilona Szwarc  Anna lying down. Ilona Szwarc  Toffee relaxes on Anna's dinner table. Ilona Szwarc  Anna walks down the jetty towards the ocean in Rockaway Beach, Queens. Ilona Szwarc ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/3799281/the-camera-as-a-bridge-a-daughter-in-laws-tale-on-mothers-day/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/3799281/the-camera-as-a-bridge-a-daughter-in-laws-tale-on-mothers-day/"},"headline":"The Camera as a Bridge: A Daughter-in-Law's Tale on Mother's Day","datePublished":"2013-05-10T08:00:28.000Z","dateModified":"2026-05-11T04:40:48.095Z","description":"Photographer Ilona Szwarc's camera has brought her closer to her mother-in-law than she could ever imagine. 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