Fifty Shades of Grey is expected do big business at the box office when it opens in time for Valentine’s Day weekend. But the film adaptation of E.L. James’ wildly popular erotic novel, starring Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson, is hardly everyone’s taste. Plenty of couples — and single people — will be so opposed to getting to know their inner goddesses that they’ll skip the theater altogether.
But if your idea of a successful Valentine’s Day involves sitting in the dark for hours without looking at or talking to your partner, there’s still hope. Take TIME’s quiz, below, to figure out which of these new or recent releases is right for you.
You can also try TIME’s flowchart to aid your Valentine’s Day decision-making:
- The Fall of Roe and the Failure of the Feminist Industrial Complex
- What Trump Knew About January 6
- Follow the Algae Brick Road to Plant-Based Buildings
- The Education of Glenn Youngkin
- The Benefits and Challenges of Cutting Back on Meat
- Here's Everything New on Netflix in July 2022—and What's Leaving
- Women in Northern Ireland Still Struggle to Access Abortion More Than 2 Years After Decriminalization