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February 3, 2015 2:09 PM EST

This post is in partnership with Inc., which offers useful advice, resources and insights to entrepreneurs and business owners. The article below was originally published at

If you truly want to be successful and happy, make these powerful promises to yourself, today and every day:

1. I will be self-aware but not self-centered.

Only losers are self-centered. They view the world through a lens of “what’s in it for me.” They have little insight into their own motivations.

Rather than self-centered, I will be self-aware. I will strive to recognize what I’m feeling and why I feel that way. I will consider how my feelings might influence my decisions.

2. I will be assertive but not aggressive.

Only losers are aggressive. They feel that they must control every conversation and win every argument.

Rather than aggressive, I will be assertive. I will have the self-confidence to state my positions firmly without feeling attacked if and when somebody disagrees.

3. I will be empathetic but not dramatic.

Only losers are dramatic. They crave attention so much that they turn every situation into a crisis or a conflict.

Rather than dramatic, I will be empathetic. I will work hard to understand and appreciate the thoughts and emotions of my team.

4. I will be independent but not isolated.

Only losers isolate themselves. They build barriers that keep them from connecting with other people.

Rather than isolated, I will be independent. While knowing I am complete unto myself, I will build bridges that connect me to others.

5. I will be proud but not prideful.

Only losers are prideful. They believe in their own superiority and see everyone as unworthy.

Rather than prideful, I will be proud. I will take pleasure in my own achievements and in the achievements of my team.

6. I will be flexible but not passive.

Only losers are passive. When their plans go astray, they passively allow the flow of events to determine the direction.

Rather than passive, I will be flexible. I will adapt to circumstances and change my plans as necessary to achieve my goals.

7. I will be straightforward but not rigid.

Only losers are rigid. They stick to their guns even when they’re know they’re in the wrong.

Rather than rigid, I will be straightforward. I will let my moral compass point me in the best direction.

8. I will be optimistic but not gullible.

Only losers are gullible. They believe in the impossible, even when it’s literally “too good to be true.”

Rather than gullible, I will be optimistic. I will cultivate a positive attitude that will sustain me through both good times and difficult times.

9. I will be realistic but not pessimistic.

Only losers are pessimists. They either believe that change is impossible or fear that any change, should it happen, will always be for the worse.

Rather than a pessimist, I will be a realist. I will see the world as it is and then strive my best to make it better.

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