Updated: February 3, 2017 1:56 AM ET | Originally published: January 27, 2014 11:15 PM EST

1. How lifting the lid off one of these still gives you a feeling of totally childish joy.

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2. How no Chinese mall’s entrance is fully dressed without this inflatable.

A view of a giant rooster sculpture with a Donald Trump hairstyle, installed to celebrate the Chinese Year of the Rooster outside a shopping mall, on Dec. 29, 2016, in Taiyuan, China
Barcroft Media/Getty Images

3. How this tune can both grate and be deeply comforting at the same time.

4. Rising to the sartorial challenge set by each year’s changing Chinese Zodiac.

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5. This song about the inevitable, annual questions from prying relatives on each and every stage of the life cycle.

6. The lure of this date-for-hire app, with its promise to shut family members down. But with festive surge pricing sending daily rates as high as $1,500, your equally mandated great-paying job might actually need to exist.

A page of a date-hiring app "Hire Me Plz," which says "Rent now for 999 yuan an hour," is shown in this picture illustration in Beijing on Jan. 26, 2017
Damir Sagolj—Reuters

7. Feeling crazily incomplete without at least one of these on the lawn or patio or balcony.

8. The schadenfreude you feel on seeing someone who’s clearly been coerced into sporting traditional garb.

9. Why this is the most important flowchart you’ll ever come across in your young (or older-but-still-not-rolling-in-it) life.

10. That there’s never been a better year to gift your baby cousin a Rocky Rooster Cabbage Patch doll.

And whatever you’re doing this Lunar New Year, here’s wishing you an amazing and wonderful Year of the Rooster! Cock-a-doodle-doo!

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