Sochi Mayor Declares City 100 Percent Straight

The mayor of Sochi rolled out the welcome mat to gay visitors during the winter Olympics, promising a pleasant stay for any homosexuals who “don’t impose their habits” on the community, which is apparently 100 percent straight.

Anatoly Pakhomov told the BBC that Russia’s gay speech restrictions would force none of Sochi’s gays into hiding, as the city had no gays in the first place. Asked how he could know, Pakhomov responded, “I am not sure, but I don’t bloody know them.” Thus concluded the not quite scientific, but official survey.

[BBC]