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Myspace’s Brilliant New Marketing Strategy: Reminding You How Awkward You Were in Middle School

Courtesy Myspace

Once the most popular social network on earth, Myspace has sunk to new lows to lure you back

Like an obsessive ex who just can’t let go, Myspace is sending emails to people who haven’t logged in since the aughts to remind them of the good old days. And like anyone who pines for the past –the social network had more than 300 million users (70 million of them in the U.S.) in its heydey — Myspace hasn’t forgotten a single moment you spent together.

First of all, it kept your pictures (shudder), all 15 billion of them. Remember that time you and your best friend wore matching Fall Out Boy crop tops and took mirror selfies? So does Myspace. To help refresh your memory, it’s been including a snap or two in emails begging folks to give it one more chance. You’ll have to log back in to get a better look at photos from your ill-spent youth and delete them.

Myspace isn’t just trying to win you back by assaulting you with nostalgia, though. It’s changed and grown too. Really. The site that Rupert Murdoch famously paid $580 million for back in 2005, then dumped in 2011 for a paltry $35 million, is now partly-owned by Justin Timberlake. Claiming the world’s largest digital music library, it feels more like Spotify or Pandora than its one-time rival Facebook.

That’s great and all, but the vintage pics need to go, ASAP.

TIME Photos

Feel Good Friday: 14 Fun Photos to Start Your Weekend

From mermaids to heat waves, here's a handful of photos to get your weekend started right

TIME Photos

The Most Surprising Photos of the Month

Time looks back over the past month to present a selection of underreported, improbable and astounding images that caught the attention of our photo editors. From Darth Vader to cheese rolling, each photograph, we trust, will surprise you.

TIME Food & Drink

Photos: Southern Eats To Get You Ready for Memorial Day

With Memorial Day upon us, the season of burgers, dogs and BBQ kicks off. Photographer Andrew Hetherington shares pictures from his "5,000+ calories a day" Southern Eats Road Trip

TIME Photos

Motorcycle Stunt Riders Soar Past a Gorgeous Japanese Pagoda

They're training for the Red Bull X-Fighters World Tour

TIME Photos

Feel Good Friday: 22 Fun Photos to Start Your Long Weekend

TIME Environment

The World’s Most Endangered Freshwater Turtles and Tortoises

Slow and steady may win the race, but on World Turtle Day, these animals are struggling to survive

Is there anything more harmless than a turtle? (Unless, I suppose, you’re a nice, leafy vegetable.) Turtles and tortoises—the main difference is that turtles dwell at least partially in water, while tortoises live exclusively on land—are slow-moving, peaceful animals whose main form of protection from the outside world is a hard shell. Not for nothing do we have the fable of the slow and steady tortoise winning the race. Turtles have existed in some form for more than 220 million years, outlasting their early contemporaries the dinosaurs. Long-lived turtles and tortoises are symbols of perseverance in the natural world.

Unfortunately, the rules of the race are changing. Turtles and tortoises are among the world’s most endangered vertebrates, with about half their more than 300 species threatened with extinction. Only primates—human beings expected—are at greater risk of being wiped off the planet. The threats are many. The animals are collected by traders, eaten in the wild and in fine restaurants, used as pets or for traditional medicine, and sometimes simply killed. The very adaptations that once made them so successful—their long adult life span and delayed sexual maturity—has made them vulnerable as the world around them changed, mostly thanks to human beings. Climate change threatens them as well—a recent study found that as the water warms, more and more sea turtle hatchlings are being born male, which could eventually make it impossible for the species to reproduce successfully.

A 2011 report from the Turtle Conservation Coalition makes it clear: we need to act now if we’re to save the turtles and the tortoises:

We are facing a turtle survival crisis unprecedented in its severity and risk. Humans are the problem, and must therefore also be the solution. Without concerted conservation action, many of the world’s turtles and tortoises will become extinct within the next few decades. It is now up to us to prevent the loss of these remarkable, unique jewels of evolution.

As we mark World Turtle Day on May 23, spare a thought for these armored but endangered creatures.

TIME

You Can Now Turn Your Instagrams Into Shoes

Adidas is letting consumers turn Instagram photos into shoe design Adidas

It was bound to happen sooner or later

Have you ever looked down at your gym shoes and thought, “If only my sneakers were plastered in pictures of yesterday’s Crab Cakes Egg Benedict… then I’d really be fashion forward.”

Yes? Anyone?

No matter.

Adidas thought it would be a great idea to allow consumers to design their shoes with photos they’ve taken on Instagram — finally combining the world of food porn and footwear. By using the adidas Photo Print App, people can print and paste photos on their ZX Flux shoes. And while while adidas suggests buyers slap on their pictures of hamburgers, cherry blossoms and giant rock formations, we have a more hip and with it list of Instagram suggestions: a friend doing duck face, your hot dog legs at the beach, or a very self-aware shot of a circle of your friends’ shoes.

It seems like you can turn an Instagram photo into just about anything these days. There are even Instagram inspired marshmallows. Marshmallows! At least shoes are a more traditional choice. Can’t wait to gram the grammed shoes. Meta is so in right now.

TIME Photos

Barbara Walters: A Career in Pictures

It’s hard to imagine a world where Barbara Walters isn’t on television. After all, this is a woman who entered the news business (as a segment producer on NBC’s Today Show) in 1962 and has been on the air longer than many of her fans have been alive.

But, as she announced nearly a year ago, the groundbreaking journalist will retire from the small screen today after hosting one last episode of The View.

To celebrate her 50 years in television, we’ve assembled a gallery of images from her long and storied career.

 

 

TIME Photos

Feel Good Friday: 21 Fun Photos to Start Your Weekend

From rocket launches to Conchita Wurst, here's a handful of photos to get your weekend started right

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