TIME Bizarre

Indonesian Police Want To Stop Sales of Children’s Shirts Showing Pandas Mating

Giant Pandas Tian Tian And Yang Guang Ahead Of The 2014 Breeding Season
Jeff J Mitchell—Getty Images Tian Tian the female panda at Edinburgh zoo sits inside her enclosure on April 4, 2014

But it seems as if the "obscene" apparel might be a hoax

According to the Indonesian police, pandas mid-coitus is not an appropriate design for children’s t-shirts.

The public relations division of the force issued a Facebook appeal Wednesday asking anyone who knew about the circulation of these “obscene” shirts to report it to their nearest police station immediately. The post was accompanied by the following picture:

But, as local blog Coconuts Jakarta points out, the police may have been had. The photo the police posted reads “9gag.com” in the corner — a website that is famous for memes and photoshopped illustrations. Considering how often The Onion has fooled reporters and politicians alike, this wouldn’t be entirely out of the ordinary.

But, regardless, pandas engaging in the Kama Sutra probably isn’t something you’d want your children to wear

TIME Bizarre

Kentucky Police Blame Cold Weather On … Elsa From Frozen

Frozen
Disney

"Suspect is a blonde female last seen wearing a long blue dress and is known to burst into song 'Let it Go!'"

Cold weather hasn’t stopped a Kentucky police department from showing its sense of humor.

The Harlan City Police Department posted on its Facebook page Wednesday that it blamed poor weather on Elsa from Frozen, and that it had taken out a warrant for the snow princess’ arrest.

For the uninitiated, Elsa possesses the magical power to create snow and ice.

Shortly after, the Harlan police posted another message warning residents that, joking aside, the weather was still serious business.

While we might not be able to blame Elsa for the weather, how about issuing an arrest warrant for getting “Let It Go” stuck in our heads for the past year and a half?

TIME Bizarre

Pizza Hut Just Released a Very Exclusive Line of Nail Polish

The dream we never knew we had

Pizza Hut Australia has proved to be the best Valentine in the southern hemisphere if not, well, the entire universe.

As a part of a holiday promotion, the chain created limited-edition pizza-themed nail polish to bestow upon 30 people who wrote the best pizza-themed poetry. It’s the dream you never knew you had.

Colors include “Meat Me After Midnight,” “Dough You Need Me” and more pedestrian options like “Say Cheese.” Combined, these colors can create incredible nail art like this:

The only thing that could make this better was if the polish was scented. And, you know, available for purchase by the general public. Pizza Hut announced winners — and their cheesy poems — Monday:

 

TIME Bizarre

This Guy Made a Snow Plow He Can Use While Sitting on the Toilet

Genius idea or loo-ney idea?

A hardware store in Bethesda, Md., demonstrated a novel way to plow snow on the street Tuesday morning after a winter storm pummeled the Washington D.C. area.

David Goldberg of Union Hardware whizzed down the street on this motorized toilet with a snow plow attached — nicknamed “Loo-cy” (it has also gone by “Loo-Cille”). He told WUSA 9 he made the contraption for the local pride parade last summer and just tacked on the snow plow recently.

No word on whether this snow plow is heading up to Boston.

 

TIME Bizarre

A Man Is Listening to 168 Hours of Nickelback for Charity

Celebrities Visit SiriusXM Studios - November 20, 2014
Monica Schipper—Getty Images Nickelback musicians, from left, Mike Kroeger, Daniel Adair, Chad Kroeger and Ryan Peake visit SiriusXM Studios in New York City on Nov. 20, 2014

Give generously

People are willing to do all sorts of humiliating, torturous and even downright dangerous things for a good cause.

Take podcaster Jesse Carey.

On Monday, Carey, from Relevant magazine’s podcast, began a self-imposed “ultimate test of endurance” when he started listening to the entire Nickelback catalog, on repeat, for the entire week — amounting to a total of 168 hours.

With the help of an organization called Charity: Water, Carey wanted to raise $10,000 to build a well in one of the developing nations supported by the group. The campaign has already topped $17,000.

“$10,000 is an incredible amount of money to raise. I mean it’s amazing, our average campaign raises about $1,000,” said Kaitlyn Jankowski, supporter-experience manager for Charity: Water, on last Friday’s podcast.

While the primary goal is to build the well, Carey thinks his endeavor may produce other positive side effects.

“I want someone who’s going through a hard time next week to be like, ‘Huh, I’m really down and out, life’s really got me down, but right now there’s a guy who’s been listening to Nickelback for days straight,’” he said on the podcast.

Right now it has been two days, and Carey is already showing signs of fatigue. Let’s hope he can power through:

“If you’ve got a better idea, I would have loved to have heard it two weeks ago,” he told his listeners last Friday.

TIME film

Drive-In Movie Theater Shows Fifty Shades of Grey, Causes Traffic Jam

Universal

Parents were less than pleased

Traffic piled up on Sacramento, Calif.’s Highway 50 this weekend after unsuspecting motorists got an eyeful of Fifty Shades of Grey, which was playing at a nearby drive-in movie theater, Good Morning America reports.

Parents were not pleased that their curious children were treated to some sexy scenes when driving into the theater.

“We just drove in and these two- he’s 12 and he’s 10- were very interested watching it coming in,” John Schmidt, who came to the theater with his family to celebrate his son’s 10th birthday, told a local Fox affiliate.

The Spongebob Movie was playing on a different screen.

Schmidt continued, “I’d think it’s a safety issue; people trying to sneak a peek as they are going 70 miles-an-hour down the freeway and looking not where they are supposed to be going, but looking at the movie.”

Whoops.

Read next: 7 Totally Unexpected ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Products

TIME Bizarre

The Time Valentine’s Day Was 96 Hours Long

A heart is painted in the snow on a tabl
Jochen Luebke—AFP/Getty Images A heart is painted in the snow on a table of a sidewalk cafe in Berlin on another snowy Valentine's Day, in 2005

Thanks to one romantic governor

Valentine’s Day of 1978 shouldn’t have been a particularly special one — in fact, for a while it looked like it might end up being one of the worst in history.

That year, early February brought with it the legendary Blizzard of ’78 to Massachusetts. It was, quite literally, a perfect storm: certain meteorological conditions combined to keep the storm off the Atlantic coast for a few days, where it built up force. When it hit, around February 5 of that year, thousands were stranded or worse, having been unprepared for the magnitude of the blizzard. The storm continued for days. Dozens of inches of snow were recorded, along with flooding and high winds.

Massachusetts Governor Michael Dukakis declared three days of official holiday, to keep people off the road — and, about a week later, he made a similar declaration. Though the storm had finally passed, Valentine’s Day was still disrupted, at great cost to the hearts and wallets of the state — so he decided to act. As TIME reported on the Feb. 27, 1978, issue:

Valentine’s Day was different this year in Massachusetts: it was 96 hours long. The extension was due to Governor Michael Dukakis, who realized that the recent blizzard had left ardent suitors trapped in several feet of snow. Worse, merchants estimated that they would lose $10 million worth of sales of candy, flowers and greeting cards. So Dukakis extended the Tuesday holiday to Friday, for “spiritual as well as economic reasons.” To fulfill the spirit of the thing, he sent Valentine messages to his wife Kitty all week long.

Those four days of Valentine’s celebration are unlikely to be repeated any time soon — but there’s always a chance: Boston’s forecast for Saturday shows a chance of snow.

Read more about love, with TIME’s 2008 cover story about the science of romance, here in the TIME Vault: Why We Need Love to Survive

TIME Bizarre

London Firefighters: Please Don’t Get Stuck in Handcuffs After Seeing Fifty Shades of Grey

The department has seen an increase in the number of these incidents since the best-selling trilogy became popular

On Thursday, the London Fire Brigade warned lovers who are inspired to use handcuffs after seeing Fifty Shades of Grey to keep the key within reach so firefighters can spend time attending to actual emergencies.

The department published a similar alert in summer 2013, arguing that it has seen an increase in the number of these incidents since E.L. James’s best-selling erotic trilogy became popular. “In 2013-14, firefighters attended 472 incidents involving people being trapped or stuck, often in everyday household items,” according to a release.

The authorities release cheeky alerts about the most bizarre 999 calls, from the man who got his “manhood” stuck in a toaster to the man who had “fallen behind a toilet and become trapped.”

Read next: The Fifty Shades of Grey Movie Won’t Arouse You Like the Book Did, According to Science

TIME Bizarre

A Texas Teenager Got Fired for a Tweet Before Starting Her Job

Employers use social media too, kids

A Texas teenager got fired from her new job less than 24 hours before she started after she used a couple of choice expletives to describe it on Twitter.

“Ew I start this f*** a** job tomorrow,” tweeted the teen with username @Cellla_. CBS reports that the job she was referring to was at a branch of Jet’s Pizza in Mansfield, Texas. Unfortunately for the luckless teen, her tweet was spotted by store owner Robert Waple.

“And no… you don’t start the FA job today! I just fired you!” he replied, “Good luck with your no money, no job life.”

Waple reportedly last tweeted in 2009, and logged on only to publicly terminate Cella’s employment.

His tweets have since been deleted, and the pizza chain’s corporate office told CBS: “We regret to see the manner in which this situation has been handled by both parties involved.”

Not that Cella seems too heartbroken about it.

TIME Bizarre

Here’s What Happens When You Pour Molten Aluminum Over an iPhone 6

Don't watch if you've been pining for one

In this video, Ukrainian YouTube celebrity TechRax pours molten aluminum over an iPhone 6 — what he says are a few drops of hot liquid made from melting soda cans. Not surprisingly, dark circles form around the blobs, and the screen quickly changes colors before going blank. In fact, it kind of looks like they form a creepy face on the phone, like something out of a horror film.

The Internet star’s previous stunts include boiling one of the devices in Coca-Cola and baking it inside a turkey.

Read next: The 5 Best iPhone Games to Play This Week

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