As NewsFeed has been compiling its annual list of the best April Fools’ pranks pulled by major companies, from edible pizza boxes to a networking platform for cats, we have also been daydreaming about the pranks that should have been pulled today, such as:
Oculus Ruff: Oculus Rift headset for dogs, which plays videos designed to keep dogs entertained while their owners are out of the house.
Timber: In Tinder’s new app for lumberjacks, users saw right and left instead of swiping right and left.
Napchat: Snapchat sends out photos of people drifting off in unlikely places around the world.
Insta-graham Crackers: A new Instagram feature that prints photos onto graham crackers.
Chartbeet: Chartbeat rolls out a real-time analytics software for vegetarian clients.
Surfborts: At midnight, inspired by the lyric in her song “Drunk in Love,” the pop star Beyoncé quietly debuts a line of surfboards called surfborts with accompanying music videos of Blue Ivy flawlessly catching waves.
Reality Tear-V: Live television of someone cutting an onion for 29 hours straight, sponsored by The Onion and Norway’s national broadcasting service NRK, which has been known for airing slow-going shows like 18 hours of salmon swimming upstream.
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Write to Olivia B. Waxman at olivia.waxman@time.com