--- title: Debate: Donald Trump’s P-ssy Comment Inspired Women to Share description: Donald Trump's "grab them by the p-ssy" comments are not just words. They normalize actions that harm us canonical: https://time.com/4525201/donald-trump-kelly-oxford-sexual-assault/ author: Darlena Cunha article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2016-10-10T16:42:31.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:55:05.120Z article:section: Ideas og:title: Donald Trump’s ‘P-ssy’ Comment Inspired Thousands of Women to Share Assault Stories og:description: "We can defeat ISIS and also not assault women" og:url: https://time.com/4525201/donald-trump-kelly-oxford-sexual-assault/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt8f13d345a278a9b8/6988a960524fc01907df9ca7/trump2.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 4000 og:image:height: 2250 og:image:alt: Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump speaks during the second presidential debate at Washington University in St. Louis, on Oct. 9, 2016. og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Donald Trump’s ‘P-ssy’ Comment Inspired Thousands of Women to Share Assault Stories twitter:description: "We can defeat ISIS and also not assault women" twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt8f13d345a278a9b8/6988a960524fc01907df9ca7/trump2.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # Donald Trump’s ‘P-ssy’ Comment Inspired Thousands of Women to Share Assault Stories > Sponsored content. 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A paid TIME subscription is separate and available at time.com/subscribe-agent. ### Sources * TIME Newsletters: [time.com/newsletters](/c/time-nl-inside-2026q3/newsletters?i=934bc7df-4a3b-4f93-ab22-c9fdc8810baa&cr=time-nl-inside-2026q3-v1) ## Video: The Biggest Moments from the Second Presidential Debate [Watch (HLS stream): The Biggest Moments from the Second Presidential Debate](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/0oFylqsH.m3u8) (3:19)  _Published 2016-10-10. The two candidates face off in the second of three presidential debates._ by [Darlena Cunha](https://time.com/author/darlena-cunha/) ## Darlena Cunha Oct 10, 2016 4:42 PM UTC  Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump speaks during the second presidential debate at Washington University in St. Louis on Oct. 9, 2016 Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump speaks during the second presidential debate at Washington University in St. Louis on Oct. 9, 2016 Robyn Beck—AFP/Getty Images by [Darlena Cunha](https://time.com/author/darlena-cunha/) ## Darlena Cunha Oct 10, 2016 4:42 PM UTC “Just words.” That was one of Donald Trump’s myriad of defenses during the [second presidential debate](http://time.com/4523325/read-the-transcript-of-the-second-presidential-debate/) about the [leaked tape from 2005](http://time.com/4523653/donald-trump-leaked-audio-women/) that recorded him telling Billy Bush, formerly of _Access Hollywood_, about how he can’t stop himself from groping and kissing women without asking and how he tried to “f-ck” a married woman. But the self-described “locker room” talk isn’t just “words” to 51% of America’s population and the majority of America’s voters. About [1 in 5 women](http://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/files/publications%5Fnsvrc%5Ffactsheet%5Fmedia-packet%5Fstatistics-about-sexual-violence%5F0.pdf) experiences sexual assault in their lives in the U.S., according to one estimate. Because too many think that words like “grab them by the p-ssy” are acceptable, actions that emulate them follow. And women are the victims. In the wake of the video release, best-selling author Kelly Oxford [tweeted](https://twitter.com/kellyoxford/status/784541062119456769) a request to her more than 700,000 followers. “Women: tweet me your first assaults. They aren’t just stats. I’ll go first: old man on city bus grabs my ‘p-ssy’ and smiles at me, I’m 12.” Within minutes, Oxford’s feed was overrun with stories, and they’re still pouring in. And those are only the women who are brave enough to share their stories with the world. I know I’m not that brave. And, yes, I have a story. In fact, I have eight stories. I’m guessing one of the most overlooked part of Oxford’s request is this: “first assaults.” Oxford, like most women, knows there is more than one. Too many women have suffered a dozen times over from damage by the hands of men conditioned by “locker-room talk.” Trump tried to downplay his words several times over, consistently maintaining that “no one has more respect for women” than he does. Given [the Howard Stern recordings](http://www.cnn.com/2016/10/08/politics/trump-on-howard-stern/), the [Miss America allegations](http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/15/us/politics/donald-trump-women.html?%5Fr=0) of Trump kissing her on the mouth, [the rape](http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/donald-trump-accused-underage-rape-lawsuit-a7352976.html) [accusations,](http://fusion.net/story/328522/donald-trump-accused-rape-sexual-assault/) and the verifiable, recorded[ instances](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/politics/donald-trump-sexism-tracker-every-offensive-comment-in-one-place/) of Trump disparaging women over their looks, race, weight and more, if that sentence is true, the country is in horrible shape. They’re not just words. They normalize actions that harm us. Oxford received upwards of 50 tweets a minute from women sharing their stories. This is our reality. Women demand more respect than being addressed as the worth of our parts to a man. And yet, despite being “the single most talked about story of the entire 2016 election on Facebook with millions of people discussing it,” [according to debate moderator Martha Raddatz](http://www.politico.com/story/2016/10/2016-presidential-debate-transcript-229519#ixzz4Mh5RMcho), the tape took up only the first few minutes of the debate, with Trump deflecting to ISIS [in his replies](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trump-remains-defiant-ahead-of-debate-as-surrogates-grapple-with-tape-fallout/2016/10/09/9a95a09a-8e28-11e6-9c85-ac42097b8cc0%5Fstory.html): “Yes, I’m very embarrassed by it. I hate it. But it’s locker-room talk and it’s one of those things. I will knock the hell out of ISIS, we’re going to defeat ISIS.” This deflection tactic is see-through and weak. It’s a fallacy. We can defeat ISIS and also not assault women. Toward the end of the short segment dedicated to Trump’s tape, [he said](http://www.npr.org/2016/10/09/497056227/fact-check-clinton-and-trump-debate-for-the-second-time?utm%5Fsource=facebook.com&utm%5Fmedium=social&utm%5Fcampaign=npr&utm%5Fterm=nprnews&utm%5Fcontent=202609), “We can get on to much more important things, much bigger things.” To some of us, the important things are on that tape. And we’re tired of being thrown under a bus full of locker-room talk. ## Transcript [ APPLAUSE ] Hello. Hello. Certainly, I'm not proud of it. But this is lock- a- room talk, you know. When we have a world. Where you have Isis chopping off heads, where you have, and frankly drowning people in steel cages, where you have wars and horrible, horrible sights all over. I think it's clear to anyone who heard it that it represents exactly who he is, because we've seen this throughout the campaign. We have seen him insult women. We've seen him rate women on their appearance, ranking them from one to ten. We've seen him embarrass women on TV and on Twitter. It's just words folks. It's just words. If I win, I am going to instruct my Attorney General. To get a special prosecutor to look into your situation. Our intelligence community just came out and said in the last few days that the Kremlin, meaning Putin and the Russian government, are directing the attacks, the hacking, on American accounts to influence our election. And believe me, they're not doing it to get me elected. To solve a problem, you have to be able to state what the problem is, or at least say the name. She won't say the name and President Obama won't say the name. But the name is there. It's radical Islamic terror. It's also very shortsighted and even dangerous. To be engaging in the kind of demagogic rhetoric that Donald has about Muslims. It is sort of amusing to hear somebody who hasn't paid federal income taxes in maybe 20 years talking about what he's going to do, but I'll tell you what he's going to do. His plan will give the wealthy and corporations The biggest tax cuts they've ever had. Did you use that $ 960 million loss to avoid paying personal federal income taxes for- Of course I do! Of course I do! And so do all of her donors, or most of her donors. I know many of her donors, her donors took massive tax write- offs. [ CROSSTALK ] Personal federal income tax- A lot of my write- off was depreciation and other things that Hillary, as a senator, allowed. Russia hasn't paid any attention to ISIS. They're interested in keeping Assad in power. You're two minutes is up. I don't like Assad at all, but Assad is killing ISIS. Russia is killing ISIS. And Iran is killing ISIS. And those three have now lined up Because of our weak foreign policy. Would either of you name one positive thing that you respect in one another. [ LAUGH ] [ APPLAUSE ] Look, I respect his children. His children are incredibly able And devoted, and I think that says a lot about Donald. I will say this about Hillary, she doesn't quit, she doesn't give up. I respect that. [ APPLAUSE ] And that's it, the 90 minute debate is now over. History has been made. 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