--- title: This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day description: Use more rituals. canonical: https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/ author: Eric Barker article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2015-10-27T04:01:41.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:43:18.392Z article:section: Ideas og:title: This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day og:description: Use more rituals og:url: https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt2ba57fbfcbf1a358/698869cbbc6cfc165c3da123/hand-writing-pen-notebook.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 3744 og:image:height: 2106 og:image:alt: hand-writing-pen-notebook og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day twitter:description: Use more rituals twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt2ba57fbfcbf1a358/698869cbbc6cfc165c3da123/hand-writing-pen-notebook.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day > Sponsored content. 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It explains how TIME's journalism is made, from the first pitch through the editorial decisions behind a finished story or cover. #### How can I read about how TIME chooses its covers? Inside TIME is the newsletter where TIME's Editor-in-Chief explains cover selection and the editorial reasoning behind major stories. It is free at time.com/newsletters. #### Who is the editor of TIME? Sam Jacobs is TIME's Editor-in-Chief. He writes Inside TIME, a twice-weekly newsletter about the newsroom's reporting and editorial decisions. #### Is Inside TIME free? Yes. Inside TIME is a free newsletter, available at time.com/newsletters. A paid TIME subscription is separate and available at time.com/subscribe-agent. ## Video: How Complaining at Work Hurts Your Career [Watch (HLS stream): How Complaining at Work Hurts Your Career](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/BiVS6RWX.m3u8) (2:04)  _Published 2015-08-10. The Science of Motivation: Rick Tamlyn on Complaining at Work_ by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Oct 27, 2015 4:01 AM UTC  Womans hand, ball pen and organizer. Womans hand, ball pen and organizer. Getty Images by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Oct 27, 2015 4:01 AM UTC You read a lot on the internet about rituals that can help you be better in the morning or leap over tall building with a single bound. Maybe some celebrity does this one or that one. Yeah, wonderful. But what’s a simple solution customized for you — yes, you — that can make your happy moments happier, can help you overcome grief, increase your performance at work, and even stop procrastinating? The #1 ritual to do every day is: _use more rituals._ Confused? Science is realizing that often just _having a ritual_ is the important part — and it’s been validated in a number of studies. It doesn’t matter that Warren Buffett does it before breakfast — the most important thing is that you do it. It’s your ritual. And the more personal you make it and the more consistently you use it the more powerful it can be. Often we just rush from thing to thing but having a little ritual you always do before a big (or little) moment that sets you at ease, focuses your attention or steels your resolve can have a huge effect on how you feel and how well you perform. I spoke to Harvard professor [Francesca Gino](https://twitter.com/francescagino), author of [_Sidetracked: Why Our Decisions Get Derailed, and How We Can Stick to the Plan_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1422142698/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1422142698&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=4VVOPQJETXXJR6SM), about her research on the power of rituals to improve our lives. Okay, let’s learn how you can use little rituals to help you be happier and perform better… ## Rituals Increase Happiness Ever do a toast before you drink? It made the drink taste better. Really. Ever take joy in the ritual of preparing your morning coffee? It made that cup of joe that much better. By focusing your attention on what you drink or eat, little rituals help you enjoy these moments more. Here’s Francesca: --- > “” --- It’s called “[savoring](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/08/how-to-be-happier/)” and I’ve posted before about how research shows it’s [one of the most powerful happiness boosters](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/08/how-to-be-happier/). (It’s a big part of that [mindfulness](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/05/how-to-stop-worrying/)thing you hear so much about these days.) But rituals don’t just improve the taste of food. They can also make your kids healthier, more engaged with their family and help them get better grades. Via [_Buyology: Truth and Lies About Why We Buy_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0385523890/ref=as%5Fli%5Fss%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&tag=spacforrent-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0385523890): --- > “” --- What’s a good family ritual? When I spoke to [Bruce Feiler](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/08/happiest-families/), bestselling author of [_The Secrets of Happy Families_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0089LOHHO/ref=as%5Fli%5Fss%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B0089LOHHO&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20), he suggested having simple ol’ family dinner together. As Bruce writes in his [book](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0089LOHHO/ref=as%5Fli%5Fss%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B0089LOHHO&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- Can rituals make your relationship happier? You betcha. What’s a good one? When you see the person you love, [share good news with them](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2010/08/whats-an-easy-way-to-strengthen-your-relation/) and have them share good news with you. This is a happiness one-two punch. It helps you savor _and_ improves your relationship. ### 5 Horrible Habits You Need to Stop Right Now  Do Not Email First Thing in the Morning or Last Thing at Night “The former scrambles your priorities and all your plans for the day and the latter just gives you insomnia,” says Ferriss, who insists “email can wait until 10am” or after you check off at least one substantive to-do list item. Chris Pecoraro—Getty Images  Do Not Agree to Meetings or Calls With No Clear Agenda or End Time “If the desired outcome is defined clearly… and there’s an agenda listing topics–questions to cover–no meeting or call should last more than 30 minutes,” claims Ferriss, so “request them in advance so you can ‘best prepare and make good use of our time together.'” Sam Edwards—Getty Images/Caiaimage  Do Not Check Email Constantly Batch it and check it only periodically at set times (Ferriss goes for twice a day). Your inbox is analogous to a cocaine pellet dispenser, says Ferriss. Don’t be an addict. Tools like strategic use of the auto responder and Boomerang can help. Jetta Productions—Getty Images  Do Not Carry a Digital Leash 24/7 At least one day a week leave you smartphone somewhere where you can’t get easy access to it. If you’re gasping, you’re probably the type of person that most needs to do kick this particular habit. by nacoki ( MEDIA ARC )—Getty Images/Flickr RF  Do Not Let People Ramble Sounds harsh, but it’s necessary, Ferriss believes. “Small talk takes up big time,” he says, so when people start to tell you about their weekends, cut them off politely with something like “I’m in the middle of something, but what’s up?” But be aware, not everyone agrees with this one (and certainly not in every situation), and you may want to pay particularly close attention to norms around chit chat when traveling internationally. Reza Estakhrian—Getty Images Via [_The How of Happiness: A New Approach to Getting the Life You Want_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0010O927W/ref=as%5Fli%5Fss%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B0010O927W&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- And when they share their good news with you, don’t just grunt or nod. Show them some admiration. When I spoke to relationship expert [John Gottman](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/12/relationship-problems/) he said this was one of the most powerful things you can do to show your love. (To learn the 4 rituals new neuroscience says will make you happy, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/09/make-you-happy-2/).) So using a ritual during the good times can make them better. But what about the bad times? ## Rituals Help You Overcome Grief When loved ones die or relationships end you can be overwhelmed with grief. You feel like you have no control over your emotions. What’s fascinating is Francesca’s research shows that rituals during the tough times can give us back that feeling of control and reduce the painful feelings. Here’s Francesca: --- > “” --- So what’s a good ritual when times are hard? Try writing about your feelings. When I spoke with [Jamie Pennebaker](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/11/how-to-deal-with-anxiety/), a professor at UT Austin, he said the ritual of writing about your problems has been proven in literally hundreds of studies to make people feel better. But don’t just document the event like you’re writing a police report. Get emotional. Open up and let those feelings out. Again, the best rituals are personal to you. Via [_Expressive Writing: Words That Heal_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00JUXQ6G0/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00JUXQ6G0&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=ZJQIIDQWGX6AH3GY): --- > “” --- (For more on how to overcome grief, anxiety or heartache with writing, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/11/how-to-deal-with-anxiety/).) Okay, so you have a ritual for when bad things happen. What about when you’re afraid bad things will happen — and you start procrastinating? ## Rituals Kill Procrastination You’re worried about that presentation at work. So you procrastinate. So you have less time to work on it. Which makes you worry more. So you procrastinate more. So… Francesca’s research showed that rituals can help reduce that terrible anxiety. Here’s Francesca: --- > “” --- So what’s a good way to help beat anxiety and reduce procrastination? When I spoke to Charles Duhigg, bestselling author of [_The Power of Habit_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0055PGUYU/ref=as%5Fli%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B0055PGUYU&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20&linkId=ROGPYKPDOY5C7URA), he suggested you use a “personal starting ritual.” Here’s Charles: --- > “” --- And here’s the best part: your personal starting ritual can be something fun. Anything that puts you in a good mood and gets you going. And that can mean video games, surfing the web or whatever little indulgence you love. Here’s Charles: --- > “” --- Research shows that procrastination is often [caused by a bad mood](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/01/improving-mood-productive/). So don’t beat yourself up and grit your teeth. Make it a ritual to give yourself a little of what you love to get you feeling good and ready to get to work. (For more on how to stop being lazy and get more done, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/08/how-to-stop-being-lazy/).) Okay, so all these change how we feel. But can rituals actually make us perform better when it counts? Yup. Here’s how… ## Rituals Make You Better At Your Job Athletes have all kinds of crazy rituals like not changing their socks or carrying a good luck charm. And you know what? This stuff _works_. Here’s Francesca: --- > “” --- In Richard Wiseman’s [research on luck](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/07/how-to-attract-good-luck/) he found good luck charms make you feel more confident and that makes you perform better. And wishing others luck [makes them do better too](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2011/08/can-someone-wishing-you-luck-really-improve-y/). Little rituals don’t just boost your ability, they can also make you more creative. Via [_The Winner’s Brain: 8 Strategies Great Minds Use to Achieve Success_](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0738214698/ref=as%5Fli%5Fss%5Ftl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0738214698&linkCode=as2&tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- What have you suspected always brings you luck? Doesn’t matter if it’s silly. Whatever gives you confidence will work. What gives you that feeling that you can take on the world? That’s your new ritual when you need to be at your best. (For more on how you can be luckier, click [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/07/how-to-attract-good-luck/).) Okay, we’ve got some great rituals. Let’s round them up and learn the final secret to rituals that makes them even more powerful… ## Sum Up Here’s how to use rituals to improve your life: * **Savoring Ritual**: Make the good times better by having something you do to focus on the good things. Share good news with a partner or have a regular mealtime with your family. * **Grief Ritual**: When something has you down, write about your feelings. It’ll reduce the pain and help you cope. * **Personal Starting Ritual**: Beat anxiety and procrastination by having a fun ritual that says it’s time to get to work. * **Peak Performance Ritual**: If it makes you feel lucky, you will _be_ lucky. Rituals increase confidence and performance. Are you skeptical? Here’s the best part: it doesn’t matter. In Francesca’s research she found that you don’t even need to believe in the power of rituals for them to [provide benefits](https://dash.harvard.edu/bitstream/handle/1/10683152/norton%20gino%5Frituals-and-grief.pdf): --- > “” --- So it doesn’t matter if the ritual comes from Warren Buffett or Steve Jobs. What matters is that it’s your ritual and that you actually do it. The best rituals don’t come from celebrities. They come from your heart. **Join over 220,000 readers. Get a free weekly update via email** [**here**](http://eepurl.com/o6uAD)**.** **_This piece originally appeared on_** [**_Barking Up the Wrong Tree_**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/10/ritual/)**_._** Related posts: [How To Get People To Like You: 7 Ways From An FBI Behavior Expert](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/10/how-to-get-people-to-like-you/) [New Neuroscience Reveals 4 Rituals That Will Make You Happy](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/09/make-you-happy-2/) [New Harvard Research Reveals A Fun Way To Be More Successful](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/09/be-more-successful/) ## Transcript what complaining does to our life and our career is huge. Our life moves in the direction of what we think about, what we talk about to each other primarily. So if we spend a good portion of our day complaining about what's not working, it actually starts to generate more of what's not working. [ MUSIC ] Motivation comes from having a conversation about what do we Create. Rather than the complaining conversation that we have most of our days. Many of use get caught here. Because it's easy to complain with each other, it feels good. As a coach and as a trainer, a motivator. I come along and say let's flip that. Rather than talk about what are you complaining about in your life, what's not working. Lets talk about what's working. Because then all of a sudden your life will start to go in that direction. There's little fibers in the brain, like the neural pathways they're called. And the more we complain, that neural pathways of that complaint actually grows a little bit every time you think about it. Remember the vinyl records? You play that record over and over again in the same groove, what happens it gets stuck in that groove and that's what happens in the brain. So it literally becomes a habit because the chemical nature of the brain says I have a thicker wire over there. I'm going to go there. We don't even notice it. We don't even notice it. So I come along and start to have a person think and really push against that and say stop doing that. Let's flip the conversation What is it you want to create? What is it you want to have in your life? Rather than what's not working in your life. A game to play is literally what are the thoughts that come in and what are you talking about? Catch it and have a little post it. Go okay, that was a negative moment and do a little check mark to negative moment or creative moment. Because I think those are the distinctions. Make two little lists and the end of the day go oh 80 % was spent over there. No wonder. These are very simple tool but it creates consciousness. It's a habit and it just starts spinning in that direction and we forget we can change the conversation. ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"OpinionNewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/"},"headline":"This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day","datePublished":"2015-10-27T04:01:41.000Z","dateModified":"2026-08-04T07:43:18.392Z","description":"Use more rituals.","url":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/","keywords":["Psychology","Lifestyle"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt2ba57fbfcbf1a358/698869cbbc6cfc165c3da123/hand-writing-pen-notebook.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Eric Barker","jobTitle":null,"url":"https://time.com/author/eric-barker/"}],"articleSection":"Ideas","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt2ba57fbfcbf1a358/698869cbbc6cfc165c3da123/hand-writing-pen-notebook.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"hand-writing-pen-notebook","caption":"hand-writing-pen-notebook","creditText":"Getty Images","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/section/ideas/","name":"Ideas"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"/tag/psychology/","name":"Psychology"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/","name":"This Is the No. 1 Ritual You Need to Do Every Day"}}]},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"VideoObject","name":"How Complaining at Work Hurts Your Career","description":"The Science of Motivation: Rick Tamlyn on Complaining at Work","thumbnailUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/v2/media/BiVS6RWX/poster.jpg?width=720","uploadDate":"2015-08-10T17:52:49.000Z","contentUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/BiVS6RWX.m3u8","embedUrl":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/","duration":"PT2M4S","potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","target":"https://time.com/4086909/daily-ritual/?jw_start={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"}}] ```