--- title: Psychology: 11 Tips to Get People to Help You description: Mimic their body language canonical: https://time.com/4019067/psychology-people-tips/ author: Business Insider article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2015-09-02T16:56:55.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-08-04T07:41:34.147Z article:section: Ideas og:title: 11 Psychological Tips to Get People to Help You og:description: Mimic their body language og:url: https://time.com/4019067/psychology-people-tips/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltde093bcdab65f2d0/6988d9b9bc6cfc69913e2a3c/time-logo.jpg?branch=production og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: TIME og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: 11 Psychological Tips to Get People to Help You twitter:description: Mimic their body language twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltde093bcdab65f2d0/6988d9b9bc6cfc69913e2a3c/time-logo.jpg?branch=production --- # 11 Psychological Tips to Get People to Help You > Sponsored content. 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It explains how TIME's journalism is made, from the first pitch through the editorial decisions behind a finished story or cover. #### How can I read about how TIME chooses its covers? Inside TIME is the newsletter where TIME's Editor-in-Chief explains cover selection and the editorial reasoning behind major stories. It is free at time.com/newsletters. #### Who is the editor of TIME? Sam Jacobs is TIME's Editor-in-Chief. He writes Inside TIME, a twice-weekly newsletter about the newsroom's reporting and editorial decisions. #### Is Inside TIME free? Yes. Inside TIME is a free newsletter, available at time.com/newsletters. A paid TIME subscription is separate and available at time.com/subscribe-agent. ## Video: IKEA: The Psychology Behind Why We Overshop [Watch (HLS stream): IKEA: The Psychology Behind Why We Overshop](https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/0fFiBuse.m3u8) (2:31)  _Published 2015-03-11. Here's how IKEA gets us to buy more than we need, explained by TIME writer Josh Sanburn_ by [Shana Lebowitz / Business Insider](https://time.com/author/business-insider/) ## Shana Lebowitz / Business Insider Sep 2, 2015 4:56 PM UTC by [Shana Lebowitz / Business Insider](https://time.com/author/business-insider/) ## Shana Lebowitz / Business Insider Sep 2, 2015 4:56 PM UTC You don’t need to be the CEO to get people to listen to you. Psychological research suggests there are plenty of ways to get people to do what you want — without them even realizing you’ve persuaded them. We’ve rounded up 11 science-backed strategies for getting people to like you, to buy stuff, and to give you what you’re after. All of them will leave you feeling more powerful. **1\. Use a “decoy” option to get people to buy your product** In his [TED Talk](http://www.ted.com/talks/dan%5Fariely%5Fasks%5Fare%5Fwe%5Fin%5Fcontrol%5Fof%5Four%5Fown%5Fdecisions?language=en), behavioral economist Dan Ariely explains the “[decoy effect](https://faculty.fuqua.duke.edu/~jch8/bio/Papers/Huber%20Payne%20Puto%201982%20JoCR.pdf)” using an old Economist advertisement as an example. The ad featured three subscription levels: $59 for online only, $159 for print only, and $159 for online and print. Ariely figured out that the option to pay $159 for print only exists so that it makes the option to pay $159 for online _and_ print look more enticing than it would if it was just paired with the $59 option. In other words, if you’re having trouble selling the more expensive of two products, consider adding a third option whose only function is to make the “expensive” product look more enticing. **2\. Tweak the environment to get people to act less selfish** “Priming” is a powerful psychological phenomenon in which one stimulus produces a particular response to another stimulus, often unconsciously. One study, cited in the book [_You Are Not So Smart_](https://books.google.com/books?id=lqgev9c3clwC&printsec=frontcover&dq=you+are+not+so+smart&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0CCYQ6AEwAGoVChMIsuys2P%5F6xgIVS1U-Ch1bRQ8V%23v=onepage&q=priming%2520offer&f=false#v=onepage&q=priming%20money&f=false)_,_ found that participants playing the [ultimatum game](http://money.howstuffworks.com/ultimatum-game.htm) opted to keep more money for themselves when they were seated in a room with a briefcase, a leather portfolio, and a fountain pen than when they sat in a room with neutral items. Even though none of the participants were aware of what had happened, the business-related objects may have elicited competitiveness. This tactic could potentially work when you’re bargaining with someone — instead of meeting in a conference room, consider convening in a coffee shop so your partner is less inclined toward aggression. **3\. Help advance someone’s goals to get them to do you a favor** Psychologist Robert Cialdini says one way to influence people is to invoke the [reciprocity norm](https://hbr.org/2013/07/the-uses-and-abuses-of-influence). Basically, you help someone with something they need so they feel obliged to return the favor. And when you’re thanked for helping out, Cialdini advises saying something like, “Of course, it’s what partners do for each other,” instead of “no problem,” so they feel like they’re expected to do the same for you. **4\. Mimic people’s body language to get them to like you** The next time you’re trying to impress a hiring manager or the object of your affection, try subtly mimicking the way they’re sitting and speaking — they’ll probably like you more. Scientists call it the “[chameleon effect](http://www.yale.edu/acmelab/articles/chartrand%5Fbargh%5F1999.pdf)”: We tend to like conversation partners that mimic our postures, mannerisms, and facial expressions. The strangest part of this phenomenon is that it happens largely unconsciously — most participants in the “chameleon effect” study weren’t even aware that they were being copied. **5\. Speak quickly to get an argument opponent to agree with you** How you communicate your ideas can be just as important as the substance of your argument. [Research](http://psp.sagepub.com/content/17/6/663) suggests that when someone disagrees with you, you should speak faster so they have less time to process what you’re saying. On the contrary, when you’re delivering an argument that your audience agrees with, it helps to speak more slowly, so they have time to evaluate the message. **6\. Confuse people to get them to comply with your request** The “disrupt-then-reframe” technique is a sneaky way to get people to cooperate. One [study](http://psycnet.apa.org/?&fa=main.doiLanding&doi=10.1037/0022-3514.76.2.192) found that when experimenters went door-to-door selling note cards for charity, DTR helped them make twice as much money as when they simply told people they were selling eight cards for $3\. In the DTR scenario, they told people it was 300 pennies for eight cards, “which is a bargain.” [Researchers say](http://www.spring.org.uk/2013/02/the-single-most-effective-method-for-influencing-people-fast.php) that DTR works because it disrupts routine thought processes. While trying to figure out how many dollars 300 pennies comes out to, people are distracted, and so they just accept the idea that the price is a deal. **7\. Ask people for favors when they’re tired to get them to cooperate** An alert mind may express some doubt when approached with a request. Yet someone who’s [tired or distracted](https://books.google.com/books?id=iXgEAAAAQBAJ&printsec=frontcover#v=onepage&q=tired&f=false) will likely be less critical, and will simply accept what you say as true. So if you’re planning to ask a coworker to help out with a project that will supposedly only take an hour, it’s best to ask at the end of a workday. That way, they’ll be drained from the day’s tasks and won’t have the mental energy to realize that the project will probably take up more of their time. **8\. Display an image of eyes to get people to behave ethically** In one [study](https://www.staff.ncl.ac.uk/daniel.nettle/ernestjonesnettlebateson.pdf), people were more likely to clean up after themselves in a cafeteria when they saw an image of eyes than when they saw an image of flowers. The study authors say that eyes typically indicate social scrutiny. Whether you’re trying to prevent littering or encourage people to return the books they borrow from the office library, it helps to give people the impression that they’re being watched. **9\. Use nouns instead of verbs to get people to change their behavior** In one [study](https://books.google.com/books?id=mMoWWbJDcf8C&printsec=frontcover&dq=How+To+Get+People+To+Do+Stuff&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0CB0Q6AEwAGoVChMI9onmqeKexwIViSceCh3RQgrH#v=snippet&q=belong&f=false), people were asked two versions of the same question: “How important is it to you to _vote_ in tomorrow’s election?” and “How important is it to you to be a _voter_ in tomorrow’s election?” Results showed that participants in the “voter” condition were more likely to cast their ballots the next day. That’s likely because people are driven by the need to belong, and using a noun reinforces their identity as a member of a specific group. **10\. Scare people to get them to give you what you need** [Research](http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S002210319791341X) suggests that people who experience anxiety and then a sense of relief usually respond positively to requests afterward. For example, people who heard an invisible policeman’s whistle while crossing the street were more likely to agree to complete a questionnaire than people who didn’t hear anything. That’s possibly because their cognitive resources were occupied thinking about the potential danger they encountered, so they had fewer resources left to think about the request that was just posed. **11\. Focus on what your bargaining partner is gaining to get them to agree to your offer** While negotiating, [research](http://www.businessinsider.com/a-linguistic-trick-for-negotiations-2015-8) suggests you should emphasize to your partner what they’re about to _gain_ as opposed to what they’re _losing_. For example, if you’re trying to sell a car, you should say, “I’ll give you my car for $1,000,” instead of, “I want $1,000 for the car.” That way, you’ll persuade your partner to see things from a different perspective, and they’ll probably be more likely to concede. _This_ [_article_](http://www.businessinsider.com/psychological-tricks-to-influence-people-2015-8) _originally appeared on_ [_Business Insider_](http://www.businessinsider.com) _More from Business Insider:_ * [17 mind-blowing psychology findings that explain the baffling choices you make every day](http://www.businessinsider.com/mind-blowing-psychology-findings-2015-7) * [Here are the major differences between successful and unsuccessful people](http://www.businessinsider.com/major-differences-between-successful-and-unsuccessful-people-2015-9) * [One word successful people never use at work](http://www.businessinsider.com/one-word-successful-people-never-use-at-work-2015-8) * [6 writing tips from a sitting Supreme Court justice](http://www.businessinsider.com/us-supreme-court-justice-gave-some-amazing-tips-on-how-to-be-a-better-writer-2015-8) * [13 surprising ways your name affects your success](http://www.businessinsider.com/how-your-name-affects-your-success-2015-8) _Read next:_ [_How to Deal With a Narcissist, Backed by Research_](http://time.com/4018776/narcissist-advice/?iid=time%5Freadnext) [_Download TIME’s mobile app for iOS to have your world explained wherever you go_](https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/time-mobile/id328218429) ### 5 Horrible Habits You Need to Stop Right Now  Do Not Email First Thing in the Morning or Last Thing at Night “The former scrambles your priorities and all your plans for the day and the latter just gives you insomnia,” says Ferriss, who insists “email can wait until 10am” or after you check off at least one substantive to-do list item. Chris Pecoraro—Getty Images  Do Not Agree to Meetings or Calls With No Clear Agenda or End Time “If the desired outcome is defined clearly… and there’s an agenda listing topics–questions to cover–no meeting or call should last more than 30 minutes,” claims Ferriss, so “request them in advance so you can ‘best prepare and make good use of our time together.'” Sam Edwards—Getty Images/Caiaimage  Do Not Check Email Constantly Batch it and check it only periodically at set times (Ferriss goes for twice a day). Your inbox is analogous to a cocaine pellet dispenser, says Ferriss. Don’t be an addict. Tools like strategic use of the auto responder and Boomerang can help. Jetta Productions—Getty Images  Do Not Carry a Digital Leash 24/7 At least one day a week leave you smartphone somewhere where you can’t get easy access to it. If you’re gasping, you’re probably the type of person that most needs to do kick this particular habit. by nacoki ( MEDIA ARC )—Getty Images/Flickr RF  Do Not Let People Ramble Sounds harsh, but it’s necessary, Ferriss believes. “Small talk takes up big time,” he says, so when people start to tell you about their weekends, cut them off politely with something like “I’m in the middle of something, but what’s up?” But be aware, not everyone agrees with this one (and certainly not in every situation), and you may want to pay particularly close attention to norms around chit chat when traveling internationally. Reza Estakhrian—Getty Images ## Transcript IKEA. Many of us have shopped here. But more importantly, many of us have over- shopped here. Its layout may seem benign, just a meandering path past living room sets, storage units and so much else. But it's actually a conscious effort to get us to not only buy but to buy things we didn't have on our list when we walked in. [ MUSIC ] Here's some of the psychology behind how IKEA's maze works. We're about to walk through the first part of IKEA's store which should be familiar to anybody who's been to IKEA, and that's the showroom. IKEA is very unique. And very different from, from other stores. You start going through this maze, through what's essentially a virtual catalog. Most of the time you can't actually pick up things and put them in your cart. That can actually prime customers, says Alan Penn, a University of College- funded professor who studies Ikea. It creates a sort of anticipation for when we get to a section where we can actually toss things in our cart. We essentially have to walk through the entire store, past all its products. Unless we take advantage of all its short cuts. He believes it's also psychologically disruptive because we've essentially handed over our shopping experience to Ikea, we're at the store's mercy. And then once we get to a place where we can pick up items, we're worried about having to go back and find them again if we don't grab them, so we might as well throw them in our cart. [ MUSIC ] Over the last decade, the cost of consumer goods has plummeted, thanks in part to their manufacture overseas. But then we bring it all home. And oftentimes all the stuff that we thought would make us happier just sits there. It turns out we didn't need a lot of it after all. And to deal with the anxiety that our over- stuffed homes can often bring us, well, we go shopping. After all, that Ikea bookcase to help us organize everything we just bought is too cheap to pass up. [ MUSIC ] There are ways that you can gain the system. First of all, make a list of what you need and do your best to stick to it. Don't shop if you are feeling depressed or anxious, those emotions can often lead to over shopping. Bring cash and don't use credit or debit cards, which can often lead to over spending, because they make us feel disconnected from money [ INAUDIBLE ] And remember to use IKEA shortcuts when necessary. That way you can avoid parts of IKEA maze all together and hopefully end up on the other side with exactly what you need. 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