--- title: Breastfeeding in Public: Mother Writes Letter to Man Who Shamed Her description: Conner Kendall was at a T.G.I. Friday's in Indiana when the man took the photo. canonical: https://time.com/3902715/young-mother-breastfeeding-public-shaming-letter/ author: TIME article:opinion: false article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2015-05-31T19:21:00.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-05-11T04:47:30.184Z og:title: Read a Mother's Note to a Man Who Facebook-Shamed Her for Breastfeeding in Public og:description: Conner Kendall was at a T.G.I. Friday's in Indiana when the man took the photo og:url: https://time.com/3902715/young-mother-breastfeeding-public-shaming-letter/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltde093bcdab65f2d0/6988d9b9bc6cfc69913e2a3c/time-logo.jpg?branch=production og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: TIME og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: Read a Mother's Note to a Man Who Facebook-Shamed Her for Breastfeeding in Public twitter:description: Conner Kendall was at a T.G.I. Friday's in Indiana when the man took the photo twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltde093bcdab65f2d0/6988d9b9bc6cfc69913e2a3c/time-logo.jpg?branch=production --- # Read a Mother's Note to a Man Who Facebook-Shamed Her for Breastfeeding in Public > Sponsored content. Supplied in partnership with TIME. 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Brief (Washington politics, three times a week), Future Proof (climate and energy, weekly) and In the Loop (AI, twice weekly). All are free at time.com/newsletters and together reach more than 1.1 million engaged readers. #### Which TIME newsletter should I subscribe to? It depends on what you follow. For a daily briefing, The Brief. For health, Health Matters. For Washington politics, D.C. Brief. For AI and technology, In the Loop. For climate and energy as a business story, Future Proof. For culture recommendations, Worth Your Time. For how TIME's journalism gets made, Inside TIME. Readers can select any combination at time.com/newsletters. #### Are TIME's newsletters free? Yes. All seven TIME newsletters are free to join at time.com/newsletters. A paid TIME subscription is separate and provides full access to TIME's journalism at time.com/subscribe-agent. #### Who writes TIME's newsletters? TIME journalists write them. Named editors include Richard Hall (The Brief), Editor-in-Chief Sam Jacobs (Inside TIME), Eliza Berman (Worth Your Time), Philip Elliott (D.C. Brief), Justin Worland (Future Proof) and Harry Booth (In the Loop). Health Matters is written by TIME's health desk. #### How do I sign up for a TIME newsletter? Go to time.com/newsletters, choose the newsletters you want and enter your email address. There is no cost and no subscription requirement. by [Maria Mercedes Lara / People](https://time.com/author/people/) ## Maria Mercedes Lara / People Contributor May 31, 2015 7:21 PM UTC by [Maria Mercedes Lara / People](https://time.com/author/people/) ## Maria Mercedes Lara / People Contributor May 31, 2015 7:21 PM UTC One young mother is fighting back after a stranger criticized her for breastfeeding her child in public on Facebook. According to mom Conner Kendall, a male stranger snapped a photo of her breastfeeding her young son at a T.G.I. Friday’s in Terre Haute, Indiana. The picture, which was taken without her knowledge, was then uploaded on Facebook on Instagram where the unidentified man asked mothers to weigh in on the appropriateness of breastfeeding in public. “I went \[sic\] to know if this is appropriate or inappropriate as I’m trying to eat my Fridays, there are little kids around,” the man wrote along with the picture, according to a screenshot shared by Kendall. “I understand feeding in public but could you at least cover your boob up?” “He snapped the photo and then put it up on social media (Facebook and Instagram), many of the comments that followed were nothing less than harassing and shameful to, not only me, but every past, present, and future nursing mother,” Kendall [wrote in a lengthy Facebook post](https://www.facebook.com/conner.kendall/posts/993428820669198:0). “I was really very hurt by this act, because I was in no way bothering him, so what gave him the right to shame me?” Kendall decided to contact the stranger with a strongly worded letter, standing up for her right to breastfeed in public. She shared her letter on Facebook as well. “You’ve shown your true colors to many and you’ve exposed others who are likewise simpleminded,” she wrote. “While you meant to come across as exposing a violation of your rights and the rights of others, you fell into your own hypocrisy. You violated the rights of not only me, but my child. Did you know it is illegal to share the pictures of minors without the expressed permission of their legal guardian? I get that you felt uncomfortable looking at my breasts. Here is a novel idea, don’t look at them.” “I am also intelligent, I know all the facts about breastfeeding and I know what I am doing is best for my child,” Kendall continued. “I chose to do it not only because it’s rewarding, but because it is what is best for them. I am resolved, not only in my choice to breastfeed my child, but to do it whenever and wherever I want. “You have given me a platform and a drive to advocate breastfeeding ferociously. You’ve inspired me into a call of action. Rest assured, there will be action. Not only by me, the one you violated, but others like me who feel you violated them and their rights. Those that you are degrading by shaming the act of feeding their child. How I pity those who would actually belittle a mother for taking care of her child. According to Kendall, the man responded with what she called an “insincere apology.” “It is not the fact that the picture was taken, or even that it was put on social media that bothers me. If he wanted a picture he should have just asked, I would have gladly smiled,” Kendall continued. “It is the fact that it was done so in a way that aimed at shaming my child and I, as well as every other nursing mother, for taking care of my baby.” She ended her Facebook post with a special message, “ALL MOMMIES SHOULD BE ABLE TO FEED THEIR BABIES WHENEVER, WHEREVER, AND HOWEVER THEY CHOOSE!” _This_ [_article_](http://www.people.com/article/breastfeeding-mom-responds-stranger-tgi-fridays) _originally appeared on_ [_People.com_](http://people.com) ### Behind the Cover: Are You Mom Enough?  Martin Schoeller photographed four mothers who subscribe to attachment parenting for this week's cover of TIME. TIME  Jamie Lynne Grumet of Los Angeles and her son, age 3\. "I don't consider breast-feeding immodest at all. I'm not shy about doing it in public." Martin Schoeller for TIME  Dionna Ford of Kansas City, Mo., and her children, ages 4 years and 5 months. "It's so funny that the women who ask breast-feeding parents to cover up wouldn't write to Victoria's Secret to ask them to take down their ads." Martin Schoeller for TIME  Jessica Cary of Brooklyn and her daughter, age 3\. "I don't think about when I'll stop. For us, it's a life philosophy." Martin Schoeller for TIME  Melinda Larson of Long Island, N.Y., and her children, ages 6, 4, 2 1/2 and 9 months. "The philosophy resonated with us, and it felt comfortable. Other forms of parenting felt like I wasn't in my own skin." Martin Schoeller for TIME  Visual references of mother and child, at the cover shoot. 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