--- description: "People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made." title: Joan Rivers Dead: Her Funniest Quotes and Jokes image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt0c1a0b84c608994c/6986a21b35ba6f3974c03aa0/joan-rivers-dead-31.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  * [Living](/tag/time-section-living/) ## Living Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close # These Are Joan Rivers' Best One-Liners  by [Eliana Dockterman](/author/eliana-dockterman/)  ## Eliana Dockterman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Correspondent Sep 4, 2014 8:48 PM CUT  Comedienne Joan Rivers wearing black mesh dress and heels, while talking on the phone in a bathtub in New York City on March 1, 1966. Comedienne Joan Rivers wearing black mesh dress and heels, while talking on the phone in a bathtub in New York City on March 1, 1966.Truman Moore—The TIME & LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images  by [Eliana Dockterman](/author/eliana-dockterman/)  ## Eliana Dockterman Update your preferences in [Account Settings](/account/preferences/) Close Correspondent Sep 4, 2014 8:48 PM CUT The world lost one of its most biting comics when Joan Rivers died Thursday at the age of 81. Rivers acted and performed comedy for 55 years, writing most of her own material. She was known for her unapologetically blunt humor and she was egalitarian about it, too: nobody was safe from becoming the butt of a Joan Rivers joke, including Rivers herself. Distilling Rivers’ funniest jokes into a short list is an impossible task: her best material could fill several books. So, in honor of the iconic comedienne TIME has gathered just a few of her best jokes: --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- --- > “” --- ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/"},"headline":"These Are Joan Rivers' Best One-Liners","datePublished":"2014-09-04T20:48:30.000Z","dateModified":"2026-04-13T08:55:55.440Z","description":"\"People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.\"","url":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/","keywords":["Living","remembrance"],"thumbnailUrl":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt0c1a0b84c608994c/6986a21b35ba6f3974c03aa0/joan-rivers-dead-31.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","author":[{"@type":"Person","name":"Eliana Dockterman","jobTitle":"Correspondent","url":"https://time.com/author/eliana-dockterman/"}],"articleSection":"","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/blt0c1a0b84c608994c/6986a21b35ba6f3974c03aa0/joan-rivers-dead-31.jpg?branch=production&width=1200&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=1200:675&height=675","width":1200,"height":675,"headline":"Joan Rivers Dead Obit","caption":"Joan Rivers Dead Obit","creditText":"Truman Moore—The TIME & LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images","representativeOfPage":true}],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Time","url":"https://time.com/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://time.com/images/logo.png","width":528,"height":156},"foundingDate":"March 3, 1923","sameAs":["https://www.facebook.com/time","https://www.instagram.com/time/?hl=en","https://twitter.com/time","https://www.pinterest.com/timemagazine"]}},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"item":{"@id":"/tag/time-section-living/","name":"Living"}},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"item":{"@id":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/","name":"These Are Joan Rivers' Best One-Liners"}}]},{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"VideoObject","name":"Joan Rivers: A Hilarious and Unapologetic Career","description":"Joan Rivers: A Hilarious and Unapologetic Career","thumbnailUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/v2/media/URFsJdAT/poster.jpg?width=720","uploadDate":"2014-09-04T19:01:48.000Z","contentUrl":"https://cdn.jwplayer.com/manifests/URFsJdAT.m3u8","embedUrl":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/","duration":"PT1M39S","potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","target":"https://time.com/3270645/joan-rivers-dead-one-liners/?jw_start={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"}}] ```