Secret Service Gives Toddler Time Out After Baby Breached White House Fence

A toddler mastermind breached White House security Thursday night after successfully squeezing through a fence, triggering security alarms and putting the White House on temporary lockdown, as per protocol.

Although the Secret Service had to race across the lawn after the tot made its carefully crafted move, they approached this particular case of trespassing with a sense of humor — hence this glorious official statement:

“We were going to wait until he learned to talk to question him, but in lieu of that he got a timeout and was sent on way with parents,” U.S. Secret Service spokesman Edwin Donovan told White House reporters Thursday.

No word on if the toddler made contact with the infamous White House fox.