TIME NextDraft

Generation Text and Other Fascinating News on the Web

June 12, 2014

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1. The Internet Ate Teenagers

Remember when you fought, scratched, coughed, and vomited your way through high school? Well, times have changed. According to the latest government study of worrisome behavior, teens are drinking less than their counterparts from years past. They are less likely to use a weapon. They don’t fight as often. They don’t smoke as much. And they don’t tend to engage in nearly as much risky sex. Basically, they just text. They are Generation T.

+ And sort of related: “They used to match their bands for debauchery, now they have degrees and drink tea – the billion-dollar live-music business is staffed by techs who would never throw a TV out the window.” The Guardian on the end of the roadie.

2. Don’t Lean Too Far

In The New Yorker, Maria Konnikova takes a look at some studies suggesting there are consequences (sometimes dire) for women who negotiate. “It’s not that men are immune from being seen as tough or unlikeable when they make aggressive demands … But it’s only women who subsequently suffer a penalty: people report that they would be less inclined to work with them, be it as coworkers, subordinates, or bosses.

3. There Are No Lines in the Sand

A couple days ago, the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) captured Mosul and began heading towards Baghdad. Meanwhile, Kurdish soldiers have seized the city of Kirkuk. And according to WaPo: Iraq is on the brink of disintegration.

+ The New Yorker’s Dexter Filkins:: “The rapid advance of Al Qaeda-inspired militants across the Sunni heartland of northern and western Iraq has been stunning and relentless– and utterly predictable. Here’s a forecast: the bad news is just beginning.”

+ ISIS not only took Mosul without much of a fight, they also took about $425 million, making them “the world’s richest terror force.”

+ Here’s a map that details how ISIS is carving out a new country.

+ Vox: “The Iraqi army outnumbered ISIS by about 40:1 in Mosul. Yet the army still turned tail and ran — ran so fast, in fact, as to leave some of their tanks and helicopters behind.”

+ MoJo: What the Hell Is Happening in Iraq Right Now?

4. The Legend of the Holy Kale

“At first I was dubious. And derisive. And dismissive. If slightly covetous. For me, the power of food — the processed, wretched kind — has usually made me look like hell, snuffing out whatever glow I had. I eat to carpet bomb disappointment and anxiety, if only temporarily, and with disastrous results to my health.” But then GQ’s Ben Marcus decided to find out how the other half eats. And here’s his report: This is Your Body on Superfoods.” (Some of this will seem like old to news to those of us who live in the Bay Area where you get dirty looks if your Quinoa isn’t artisanal.”)

5. Waxing Brazilian

Please, don’t blame the Messi-ger: The games are finally here. But before you start watching, you might want to consider this: Watching your team in the World Cup triples your chance of having a heart attack.

+ “Brazilians sense that this opportunity offers more bad than good. They await the Cup’s arrival the way high school students might await a test they haven’t studied for.” From FP: Brazil is totally screwed.

+ If you haven’t been paying attention, then watching and discussing the World Cup can feel like taking a test. Let’s get you ready with Slate’s guide to faking your way through the tournament. (And here’s a guide to all the scandals plaguing the World Cup.)

+ The biggest shootout of them all: Can Nike Beat Adidas?

+ Hate sports but love brackets? Here’s WSJ’s guide to the World Cup of Everything Else. Tons of interesting data.

6. Grandpa Jones

“What the troopers found amid piles of old clothes and food wrappers were five duffel bags. And inside the duffel bags were 104 kilos of cocaine.” They weren’t entirely surprised to find the stash since the DEA had spent months investigating the Sinaloa cartel’s most prolific drug mule. On the other hand, it was a bit surprising that that the man driving the truck was nearly 90 years-old. (They probably pulled him over because his left blinker was on for a few hundred miles.) From the NYT Magazine, the somewhat incredible story of the Sinaloa Cartel’s oldest drug runner.

+ Related? Harrison Ford injured his ankle on the set of the new Star Wars movie.

7. Open Source on the Open Roads

Elon Musk wants to speed up the rate at which electric cars kill their gasoline-powered rivals. So he just announced that Tesla will allow anyone to use its patented technology on electric vehicles.

+ Thousands of London cabbies took to the streets to protest against Uber. One of the results: A whole lot of Londoners just downloaded the Uber app.

8. Pol Positions

People love to remind us that political polarization is nothing new and that we’ve always been divided. But the truth is that, by recent historical standards, we really are wildly polarized. And our contempt for the members of the opposite party has bled over into everyday life.

9. Killing You With Kindness

“It is a kind of clay and it is directly responsible for Internet culture.” That’s the short version. The longer version is even better. Here’s Paul Ford with some important kitty litter questions answered. I switched to a wheat-based litter. With my luck, my cats will be gluten intolerant.

10. The Bottom of the News

“The relationship between Lovatt and Peter was certainly unnatural, but not unheard of. Still, I strongly urge you to stay away from dolphins in a sexual capacity.” The Wire reports on the science experiment that led to close encounters between a woman and a dolphin. (In some corners of the Internet, this story will completely overshadow the World Cup.)

+ Syndicated from Kottke: The IPPAWARDS has been judging an iPhone photography competition since 2007 and they recently announced the winners of their 2014 competition.

+ 16 Pictures Of Beyoncé Where She’s Not Sinking In Quicksand. Plus, 7 Pricks Who Defied The Odds And Didn’t Go Into Finance. Yes, The Onion has officially launched its parody of buzzy sites. Welcome to the Clickhole. But will anyone know it’s a parody?

+ Mike Evans worked a crazy schedule as the co-founder of GrubHub. Now, he’s taking some time off from the grind of work. But his schedule is even tougher. He decided to ride his bike across America. And you can join me and follow along.

+ Bill Murray is everywhere these days. Including your wedding photos.

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