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A Sext from Ernest Hemingway (Sort Of)

Hemingway-to-Marlene-Diet-024
AuctionMyStuff.com

The sexy note that Hemingway wrote to legendary actress Marlene Dietrich in 1955 could draw as much as $50,000 in an online auction. Dietrich's grandchildren plan to sell her belongings in an AuctionMyStuff.com sale from March 19 to April 6

Auctions of celebrity possessions can benefit even those who aren’t buying or selling — case in point: an upcoming AuctionMyStuff.com sale of property from Marlene Dietrich’s grandchildren, all of which belonged to the legendary actress. Highlights include a tuxedo of hers and a letter to Dietrich from Noel Coward — and this 1955 gem of a note from Ernest Hemingway.

The two had a 30-year epistolary affair and this letter makes it clear how they kept it up even though their love was long-distance. Sure, there’s some work chat. Hemingway describes the filming of The Old Man and the Sea and also mentions what appears to be her dissatisfaction with her stage show in Las Vegas, and what seems to be an idea that he might write something for her to perform — and that’s not where it gets good. In describing what he would do if he were writing her act, here’s some of what he had to say:

As you landed on the stage drunk and naked I would advance from the rear, or your rear wearing evening clothes and would hurriedly strip off my evening clothes to cover you revealing the physique of Burt Lancaster Strongfort and and [sic] announce that we were sorry that we did not know the lady was loaded… This is a scene which is really Spine Tingling and I have just the spine for it. I play it with a Giant Rubber Whale called Captain Ahab and all the time we are working on you with pulmotors and raversed [sic] vacuum cleaners which blow my evening clothes off you.

The letter is estimated to draw a price, during the Mar. 19–Apr. 6 bidding period, that may go as high as $50,000 — which means it’s a very good thing she ignored his instructions, later in the letter, to cut the missive into pieces.

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