TIME

High “High Elf” Attacks Woman’s BMW With A Sword

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Daniel Allan—Getty Images

Evil Morgoth can come in many forms

She thought it was a pirate. That’s what she told 911 when she called for help, that a pirate was attacking her car with a sword. As it turns out, it was a “high elf”.

The woman, who chose to remain anonymous, was driving in the southeast section of Portland, Oregon, when a man wearing a helmet and shield and carrying a sword and staff ran into traffic and started attacking her BMW. As is the recommended course of action in such circumstances, she called 911 and explained the situation. Police responded to the call, and when they arrived on the scene, they found Konrad Bass dressed in chain mail, holding a sword. The woman’s car had several puncture marks.

Bass told officers that he wasn’t a pirate, but was a “high-elf engaged in battle with the evil Morgoth.” He also told officers that he had taken LSD, which may be the reason he believed a BMW was an instrument of Morgoth, the evil villain from J.R.R. Tolkein’s “Lord of the Rings” prequel, “The Silmarillion”.

He was taken to the hospital and cited for criminal mischief, but was not booked into jail.

[Via KATU]

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