This won't work for very obvious reasons
A minor league baseball team has confused the ability of completing an act of heroism with the ability to grow an opposable thumb.
The Bakersfield Blaze invited Internet celebrity/hero Tara the cat—recently caught saving her 4-year-old human from an attacking dog—to “throw out” the first pitch on Tuesday night’s game. Fans who bring in unused animal toys and unopened pet food to donate to charity will also get a discounted ticket.
A more appropriate athletic tie-in would probably have been allowing the cat to make a guest line backer appearance at a pre-season NFL game, but whatever. At least Tara fans know that no matter how bad her hand-eye coordination, it can’t possibly be worse than that time Carly Rae Jepsen tried to throw a pitch.